


Towers & Towers: A Grand Tale

by QueenUruunSunflower



Category: Original Work, Towergirls (Video Game)
Genre: Attempted Sexual Assault, BDSM, Clothed Sex, Cunnilingus, Dominance, Dragons, Dry Humping, Elves, Facials, Fauns & Satyrs, Friends With Benefits, Furry, Gay Sex, Gender Dysphoria, Goblins, Kink Discovery, Knotting, Lesbian Sex, Light Angst, Masturbation, Monster Girls, Multi, Nipple Play, Nonbinary Main Character, Oral Sex, Orgy, Outdoor Sex, Pet Play, Plushies, Polyamory, Porn With Plot, Post-Canon, Praise Kink, Public Sex, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Sex Toys, Size Difference, Straight Sex, Submission, Teratophilia, Vaginal Fingering, Watersports, Werewolves, cartoon violence, headpats, it doesnt happen though dw everyone's okay, so many Headpats, uh ig she'd count lmao
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-12 05:46:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 40,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29130504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenUruunSunflower/pseuds/QueenUruunSunflower
Summary: Do you like the cute & sexual art of Towergirls, but want all the racism and incest taken out? Do you like harems of monstergirls where the girls also date each other and have their own agency as characters? Do you want an action-packed battle series with some sex scenes thrown in for good measure? Do you find the idea of a more inherently sexual world than our own fascinating, but still want to explore the ramifications of hypersexualization on a population over the course of decades and the effects that would have over culture as a whole? Do you like dick in an ass????If the answer to any of these questions was yes, I proudly welcome you and guarantee you'll have a good time. If the answer to all of those questions was no, go away. Like no offense but you're harshing my mellow.Follow the adventures of Grand Knights Oswald and Mara as they save princesses, fall in love, stop evil, and just have so much sex like holy shit these two are cum-addicts. At least one sex scene guaranteed per chapter, with a healthy dose of story-rich fantasy for those who care about the worlds these fucks are being given in.
Relationships: Male Knight/Squire Courtier, Original Female Character(s)/Original Female Character(s), Original Female Character(s)/Original Male Character(s)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 7





	1. Oswald and Mara

**Author's Note:**

> This fic (if you can even call a story and world only loosely based around any existing media, the media itself not even containing a story in the first place, a fan-fiction) may update irregularly, as I've had a very strong writing kick lately and don't know how long it'll last XD. I do have 5 chapters written already, though, so those'll be posted soon, and probably combine to be the longest Towergirls fic on this site already lmao.
> 
> My main goal with this is to take Towergirls, you know the thing that made big-ass kobolds popular, and take all the good stuff that it provided, like character concepts and sexy world-building, while also squeezing out all of that, you know, gross shit. No incest, no racism, no transphobia. Fair warning that the idea of sexual assault will come up, but will never be actually depicted in the work. I also have a custom-made Towergirls chart in the works currently, with one of the princesses planned to appear in it already showing up in this as early as chapter 3, so hooray for that!
> 
> Princesses from all of the 'canon' charts (Gen 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and all expansions of those) will be showing up at some point, along with Princesses from the fan-charts Two Towers, Materia Expansion, Crown County, Tarot Order, and The Great Caravan, along with all the canon & fan-made Factionless Companions. 
> 
> Anyway, will probably have more to say on future chapters, at least 4 of which will be uploaded soon. Enjoy the fuck.

It’s been a long time since the Dragon Queen of Grand Tower Kingdom had been defeated. The dragons ousted by knights, the princesses returned to their homes, and peace returned to the land. There’s almost no need for knights in this new age, but still they exist, taking up arms to protect their favorite waifimean princesses. It’s quite the respectable trade. People mostly become knights for honor, and for the tradition, and not at all to try and fuck royalty. A respectable lot, all of them.

While most kingdoms simply hire knights directly from their citizenry, a title granted by the princesses themselves to their favorite heroes, there also exists the New Grand Tower Council, created to knight esteemed warriors to aid in the general protection of the realm. And of its princesses, of course. These are the highest magnitude of warriors, defenders, and public servants. Only the brightest, bravest, and most capable knights in the land can even hope to be granted the title of Grand Knight.

Two such warriors are currently in the process of being knighted themselves, even as we speak. The first is Elite Oswald, human knight-errant from the High Forest Kingdom, a man noble of goal and strong of heart who has been preparing for this day for his whole life, or so he says. The second is Dusk Mage Mara, an elven girl from the Rustling Star Kingdom, and apprentice to the famed wizard Smuhg. After completing the arduous trials and tribulations to become Grand Knights, the two of them kneel before the Council, taking their oaths. 

“...do you swear on your heart that your intentions are pure,” the chancellor reads off, “and that your motivations are for the good of the realm?”

“I do!” Mara answers immediately, cheerily, just as she has for every prompt she’s received so far. The rosy smile she wore when she entered the hearing room hadn’t left her face even once during the knighting. 

“But of course,” Oswald answers after her, his expression ever unreadable under his close-faced helm. He was less emotive than Mara, but it was hard not to be, with the mood she’s in. He remained respectful and solemn, with just the slightest hint of his own jolly mood showing in his voice. 

“And lastly, most importantly,” the chancellor concludes, the minutes-long oath finally concluding, “Do you swear on your hearts that you will hold the safety of the citizens and princesses of this realm above all else, even your very lives?” 

To this, their most important task, both warriors simultaneously answer, “Yes.” Mara’s smile widens when they actually pull off having done it at the exact same time. They’d planned it out together beforehand, and it sounded so cool in the hearing room. Oswald’s expression, of course, was still hidden under his helmet, but he felt pretty good about it, too. 

The chancellor nods sagely. “Then by my right as the forefront of the Grand Tower Council,” he tells them both, stepping forward with his diamond scepter drawn, “I knight thee… Sir Oswald the Elite…” He places the scepter upon the man’s shoulder. “And I knight thee, Lady Mara the Learned...” And then, upon her’s. “Grand Knights.” 

The two knights bow their heads, then rise. They were official knights, Grand ones, even, protectors of the land and of the various princesses that resided there. While their trials were finally over, their journey was just beginning. 

“Well,” Oswald says as the two enter the hall outside the hearing room, the proceedings finished, “That went well.”

“Hehe, my heart’s still all fluttery,” Mara admits, fanning herself and puffing out the collar of her robes over and over to puff air into her face. “I can’t believe we’re really done~!”

“Well, my dear friend, you know what they say. As one door closes, another opens.” He opens the door leading out into the city, a bustling capital for the whole realm, neutral territory for those of all kingdoms to roam freely. “We have a duty to uphold now!”

“And such a sacred one~!” Mara responds teasingly. “One for which we must remain honorable and dutiful~! It’s our job to make sure the princesses we save will remain pure and innocent, after all~!”

“Yes, of course,” Oswald responds, waving a hand. “Their sanctity is of my utmost concern.” 

“Hm…” Mara answers, covering her mouth mischievously. “Sang-*Titty*, you say…?” She giggles madly into her hands at her own bad joke.

After a pause, Oswald places a hand firmly on the mage’s scalp, rustling her hair and saying, “That I do, dear friend, that I do.” 

“Princess titty?” she asks, looking at him side-long from over the top of her sleeves.

“Why bother?” he says knowingly, “I don’t seem to have any problem with less-than-sacred women.” 

She slaps his side with her sleeve a few times and says, “You’re so meeeean~!” It was only a few seconds later that her hand was wrapped around his arm, though, and that she was saying, “So is this going to count sacrilege, or…?”  
\- - -  
Within minutes, her back was pressed into the wall of a less-travelled alleyway, her robes pushed to the side, and her panties wrapped around a single thigh. The two friends would do things like this often enough, but ever since they began working as a team for their knightly trials, they’ve had trouble keeping their hands off each other. From the start, they were in this together, and the victory they won together would taste all the sweeter with shared, steamy breaths and satisfied loins. 

Mara squeaked happily when Oswald pressed the tip of his cock past her folds and into her pussy, her arms wrapped around his neck as he held her aloft in his arms. As far as knights went, he might not have been herculean, but she was slight even for an elf, and if he could lug heavy armor around all day, he could lift her long enough to pump a load into her. 

Speaking of armor… he sure did never take it off. Even Mara, his best friend, had never seen Oswald without at least his helmet on. At the moment, as he started to thrust his cock into her over and over again, he was wearing everything but the belt keeping his greaves aloft. “C’mon, Ozzy,” she cooed as he roughly fucked her, making her mewl with pleasure. “Don’t- ahn -I get a- mm~ -kiss fo- ah! -for the oc- ohhccasion~?”

“Sorry, but you know what I always say,” Oswald answers, as stoic during sex as he is during everything else. While Mara is cooing and moaning, he’s at most giving a small grunt of effort as he ups the speed at which he plows her. 

“Something something, mm, you’re a pussy~?” Mara answered, her nearly-naked form quaking as she’s reamed. The only thing keeping her from being stark nude was the mage’s robe around her shoulders, but it left little to the imagination - her thin waist, soft thighs, and small tits were on full display for him. She closes her eyes and just focuses on the sensation of it for a while, the outdoor air against her skin as her best friend fucks her, his grip against her midsection, the friction of the brick wall she’s pressed against… Her breaths are only moans now, shaking and inviting. 

“The correct answer was being prepared at all times,” Oswald corrects, not slowing down as he speaks calmly. “If I were to unequip my armor during coitus, why, a spy could take advantage of that! I’d be utterly undefended!”

Mara giggles through her moans, breathing in deeply and saying, “So glad you… ohhhh~... v-value your… nose over your… cock…” She’s tried getting him to at least wear something open-faced, but he’s always refused! At least she’s not one of the girls turned off by it - at worst, she thinks it’s silly, but not a deal breaker. Especially given his bitch-breaker… fuck, he was thick. 

“A blow to my genitals with a large club or axe, while unpleasant, is far less likely to be fatal than a blow to the head,” he says, reaching up and squeezing the slight swell of her breast, making her yelp happily. Mara’s been a slut as long as Oswald’s known her, so honestly? She’s probably in the right profession. Despite the oath they take, purity was… more or less an uncommon trait amongst knights. It was assumed they’d be awarded by the princesses they aided in… less-than-wholesome ways. 

After a few more moments of fucking, with Mara arching her back towards him, Oswald moving one thumb down to her clit, the distance between their chests closing, Mara has an idea. “Hey,” she says breathily, “If I s-save… mm, if I save a p-princess before you… you h-have- ahh~...- have to take your helmet off for me.” Her legs are curled around his hips now, and she only ever does that once she feels herself getting close. 

“Oh?” Oswald breaths back, intrigued. It was rare that a princess would be in enough danger to even need saving, nowadays, but it *was* their job, after all… What interesting conditions. “And what do I receive upon a theoretical victory in this wager, hm?” He gives no indication of whether he’s close or not, but he has been for 2 or 3 minutes by now. He’s just good at pacing himself and holding it in until it’s needed, is all. 

“What do you w-want?” Mara asks between moans. 

“Hm…” As Oswald thinks, he thrusts hard into her, pushing her back roughly into the wall and making her shout with ecstasy. As she balls up his cape in her fists, grasping at his back as she’s pounded, he says, “Ah, how about if I win, you don’t use your contraceptive spell next time we do this?” 

Mara’s lewd gasps are interrupted by a burst of healthy giggles, even as the legs she has wrapped around his waist begin to twitch. “W-what~?” she asks, still in good humor, “W-why do you e-even want th-thaaaaht~?” Okay, back to moans, it seems. 

“Every knight needs to spawn a legacy,” he answers as heartily as ever. As far as knights went, Oswald was as traditional as they came, and a large pool of descendants was part of the traditional image… “Might as well start with someone easy to trust, hm?” 

“Ah… ahn…” Damn, that really took her off guard. She guesses he’s right, knights do stereotypically tend to sire a lot of kids, though not typically with each other… Then again, she knew spells to keep term lengths down to a month at max, there were plenty of adventurer-oriented caregivers to make sure they would both be able to stay in their line of work… and in theory, she could probably just pop one out and never see it again, if he was the one who cared about ‘legacies’ in the first place… 

There were worse wagers she could stake herself on… “D-deal,” she moans, hugging him tightly as she cums, lewdly gasping for air as he can feel her whole body quake in his arms.  
“Did you just finish, Mara?” he asks softly, still roughly fucking her.

He’s only answered by a low, “Haaaaahhhhhh~,” as she continues to shake. Oswald follows up on that information by slamming himself as far into her as he can go, over and over, forcing her hard against the brick wall at her back, until he can feel his own orgasm spill out of him, filling her with heat. 

There are a few more moments of him fucking her against the wall as they both cum, but then, the motion slows, and droplets of fluid hit the ground beneath them. Mara slides down onto the stone ground at her companion’s feet, breathing hard as she settles, feeling his seed pool under her as it drips out of her cunt. Oswald places himself next to her, crouched with his back against the wall, just as she is, the two knights side-by-side as they calm. Mara rests her head on Oswald’s shoulder and happily mutters, “That was nice~…” Just what she needed after the stress of the trials had finally come to a close. 

Putting his arm around her, Oswald says, “It always is, my friend, always is.” Friends with benefits was all they’d ever been, but they both had to admit that those benefits were quite good. So good, in fact, that they never seemed to end, because to Oswald’s surprise, he can feel her mouth around his dick, suddenly. “M-Mara,” he says, so surprised that he falls into a brief state of less-than-composed, “Are you sure you’re not satisfied after all that?” 

“A’m jushd clennih yoo uph,” she mutters with the cock in her mouth, sucking the tip for just a few more seconds before letting it fall off her tongue and back into his lap. “You’re not the one with a spell for it, so I thought I’d help~.” Speaking of spells, she sits up and twirls her hand in front of her pelvis, every drop of cum that just shot into her pussy being pulled back out by a mystic force. Then, she snaps her fingers, making it all disappear. She cheerily sticks her tongue out at the other knight, lets him see that it’s drenched in his semen, then swallows hard, taking the whole load down her throat at once. 

“The eccentricities of a mage never cease to amaze,” Oswald says, dreamily watching the display. Mara certainly gave simple spells a bit of a theatrical twist. She didn’t have to swallow it all, but…  
“Jealous~?” she asks, putting a hand on his shoulder for leverage as she hoists herself back up, her naked, sweaty body jiggling with the jump. She offers a hand out to him, which he takes, and the two of them start the phase of clean-up that doesn’t involve Mara swallowing cum. She pulls her panties back on, he fastens his belt, she makes sure her dress is aligned properly, he… well, he didn’t need to do much, he was almost totally clothed the whole time. 

Well. There was no more putting it off, he supposes. “Ready to take the first steps of our new lives as protectors, my friend?” Oswald asks amicably, watching as Mara struggles getting her robe on right.  
“Ready to lose our bet~?” she asks, smiling up at him cheekily as she finishes redressing. 

With a chuckle, Oswald replies, “We’ll see.” Either way, a princess would need saving eventually, and there was only a small handful of Grand Knights to aid in such an event. Either she’d see his face or he’d knock her up, one of the two was an inevitability. 

Mara giggles, then hooks her elbow around his arm. “Oh, we sure will~! Come on, let’s get to the courtier’s guild before it closes~.” The two friends head off to their new lives, arm in arm, as happily as they’ve ever been. The presence of the other, of course, making things all the better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Profile #1: The iron-willed and steel-everything else’d, Elite Grand Knight  
> Real Name: Oswald  
> Species: Human (?)  
> Age: 24  
> Height: 5’10”  
> Hair: ?  
> Skin: ?  
> Position: Switch, Top  
> Love: 2, Lust: 3, Power: 3, Charisma: 5, Intelligence: 2  
> Turn-ons: Clothed Sex, Multiple Partners, Breeding, Sparring, Rough Sex  
> Turn-offs: CFNM, Kissing, Receiving Facials  
> Ability - Unbeknownst - Oswald has a tendency of acting on people’s kinks without knowing he’s doing it, or ever being told what those kinks are.  
> “Having trained for knighthood his entire life, his swordplay is unmatched. His heart is fully pure, and he only cares about helping others, even at his own expense.”


	2. Courtiers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> CW - Attempted Rape & Sexual Assault Imagery
> 
> Mara and Oswald end up at the courtier's guild to find partners for their journey, and some familiar faces turn up. 
> 
> Smut levels: About 2/5, a sex scene is present, but not the most detailed or lengthy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW - Attempted Rape & Sexual Assault Imagery
> 
> To be clear, no rape will ever be featured in this story; it's intended to be a lighthearted, sexy romp through a fantasy world, maybe with a few heavier themes up for discussion, but never anything that will cross that line. If you came to this story looking for a sexualized depiction of sexual assault, you won't find it here. Even if a villain in the story *attempts* something, like in this chapter, they won't get their way, and the main characters will never be in that kind of danger for real. 
> 
> In future chapters, there may be something akin to *consensual* non-consenting roleplay, where consenting characters agree to act out a scene for their own enjoyment, but those will come with their own content warnings as well. There will never be a sexual scene that leaves someone traumatized within this story.
> 
> All of that being said, don't expect this kind of content warning very often. Like I said, the story's supposed to be a lighthearted sex adventure, with heavier themes only up for discussion every once in a while for either world-building, character growth, or to dunk on how shitty I found certain parts of the original Towergirls cough rabbit princess cough. Whenever I give a content warning, though, people who want to continue with a story but not be confronted with a trigger can find a brief summary of the chapter in the end-notes.

The first step on any knight’s journey was to find a courtier, a faithful companion to accompany you on your perilous quests, standing devout by your side, always ready with an arm in battle or a shoulder to cry on. Of course, being a sidekick is a bit of a thankless position, so at times… pickings can be slim. 

When Mara dragged Oswald into the courtier’s guild, the lobby was entirely empty, save for the secretary at the front desk. Mara deflated, having expected a crowd of willing lackeys to come crashing into them as soon as they walked in. Having a bit more realistic expectations, Oswald walks over to the front desk and says, “Pardon me, dear lass, but is there anyone here available for recruitment into a pair of knights’ parties?” 

The goblin behind the desk rolls her eyes, then sneers, “I’ll see,” before getting up and heading up a set of stairs. 

Oswald claps once as he turns back to Mara, and optimistically chimes, “I’m sure this will only take a moment!”

Mara just groans. “Where the heck is everyone? Doesn’t anyone want to go on adventures anymore?” Her small frame sinks into her mage’s robe as she pouts, the vibrant brown of her skin disappearing into the midnight blues. 

“We’ve had peace for a while,” Oswald replies, the numerous bright lamps of the guild causing his helmet to gleam. “Not much glory to be found in routine side-questing.” He slaps the mage on the back lightly, adding, “At least we’ll know those left are of pure intention! No fame-finders or gold-diggers for us to wade through, eh? Only those who truly share our passion for protecting the weak!” Mara just rolls her eyes like the goblin woman did a minute prior, silently wondering if the rest of these ‘protectors’ will be never-nudes like her friend here was. 

After a minute or so, the goblin returns, saying, “These ones’re all we gots,” before sitting right back down at her desk. She doesn’t have time for any of this.

The ‘ones’ that follow her down the stairs are three incredibly varied figures. One, an androgynous human, short and meek-looking, who seems nervous just standing amongst the present company. The second, a tall and muscular woman of hobgoblin descent, the bulkier cousin of the standard goblin, her deep yellow skin tattooed with various swirling patterns, a spear clutched at her side. And the third…

“Well hell-ooooo~!” the seductress coos as she sees the two knights. The white-haired human runs up to them, and since Oswald and Mara were already standing so close together, she can throw one arm around each knight. Her manner of dress - almost nude, save for some pasties, panties, and latex gloves and boots - combined with her pressing herself into them, the softness and warmth of her body making itself immediately evident, all combined to immediately make Mara blush. Oswald simply tilts his head, giving off a small hum. “You two are simply adorable! I’m Chantae, it’s so nice to meet you~!”

After a brief pause, during which Chantae pressed herself even further into the two of them, letting Mara feel a lot of softness through her robes, the elf mutters, “Okay, changed my mind, this place is great actually.” 

“Greetings to all three of you brave warriors!” Oswald calls out from over the shoulder of the big titty latex lady. “I would bow, were my waist free to alter itself!” The tiny human muttered something unintelligibly quiet in response to Oswald, with the hobgoblin rolling her eyes and turning away at the same time. Well, at least *one* out of the trio was enthusiastic. 

“Oh, no, feel free to bend over as much as you like, mister~,” Chantae cooed at the tower of metal that was Oswald. Mara giggled at the obvious flirt, but Oswald didn’t react at all. It was honestly hard to tell where he was even looking right now. The enchantress takes a step back from her hug and asks, “So, are you two a couple~? Do I have to worry about servicing two people out on the road, then~?”

“Being in the service of,” Oswald corrects, not wanting to get things twisted. 

“That’s what I said~!” Chantae coos back. “Come on, big guy, I’m just tryin’ to have a little fun, here~.”

“Don’t mind the fuddy duddy,” Mara says, nudging him with her elbow. “And no, only in his dreams. We’re splitting up as soon as we each have a…” She looks over Chantae’s shoulder to the other two courtiers, one of whom is trembling and the other one ignoring everything around her. “...Sidekicks…” Well, Mara knows which one *she* wants. Tough luck, Oswald, good luck with whichever one of those two weirdos you end up with. 

“My name is Oswald the Elite, Grand Knight of the Realm!” He does bow now that Chantae has him free, and does not ogle at her thighs or crotch while he’s down there like he’s sure she wanted him to. “This here is my companion Mara the Learned, also Grand Knight of the Realm!”

Instead of bowing, Mara just focuses her complete attention on Chante, totally ignoring Oswald and the freaks he was talking to. “So do you fight with that whip, or do you use it for, like… you know~?”

“Hm, I have no idea what you could ever mean by that~,” Chantae answers, putting a hand on Mara’s shoulder. “But maybe we could go talk in private so you can let me know~.”

As the two sluts giggle amongst themselves and wander off, the hobgoblin spits out, “Real impressive knights we have these days. Hmph.” She seems about as impressed with Mara as Mara’d been with her. 

“Ah,” Oswald stammers as his friend walks off without properly introducing herself. How unknightly. What would the council think? “Well, nevertheless! I very much look forward to getting to know the two of- where is she going?” The hobgoblin was also walking off now, in a direction opposite the one Mara and Chantae had gone off in. 

The short human looks between the three escaping women for a moment, then back at Oswald. J-just the two of them… they guess…. gulp. “M-my name is, er…. S-Selby, s-s-sir…” They do their best bow, but then fall over. 

“...” Maybe Mara’d had the right idea, after all… That was neither here nor there, now, though… Oswald gets down on one knee and offers a hand to small Selby, saying, “It’s a pleasure to meet you, squire. Come, let us discuss the possibilities of adventure!” Selby looks up at Oswald kind of pathetically, but takes his hand. Guess this is just how the two of them were stuck, now… 

\- - -

A few minutes later, Mara was having a… different kind of conversation. One where her tongue wasn’t being used for talking, mostly just licking. Chantae was on her lap, the small scraps of coverings the enchantress had worn before being all but discarded. As the naked woman straddled her, Mara sucked at one of her voluminous tits, lapping at and nibbling her nipple while Chantae’s hand explored around the underside of Mara’s robes. It didn’t take long for the human to find a cunt to rub at, so she happily played with Mara’s folds while getting her bosom suckled. As far as first impressions went, Chantae would say she’s doing swimmingly. 

“I’m really~ looking forward to our working relationship, my dear,” Chantae mewled into Mara’s pointed ear. She pets the elf’s hair as she continues, “You were so ready to fuck me, I can only imagine how you’ll be when we encounter the royals, hm~?” 

Mara giggles into Chantae’s fat tit, gives it another long lick, then pulls her head up long enough to say, “Trust me, I’m so ready to get a princess into bed that I’ve started getting wet when I see pictures of crowns.” Of which there were many. The entire realm was full of crown imagery, given the importance of the magic princess crownings in the realm’s culture. Which meant Mara was wet frequently. “Put your fingers inside, already,” Mara adds, pushing her hips forward a bit, before lowering her head again to lick at Chantae’s 2nd breast. It’s been way too fucking long since Mara’s had gay sex, she’s *really* enjoying this. Guys were nice and all, but fuck did she love tits. 

Chantae obliges, sinking two fingers into the elf’s wet snatch, bringing out a moan from Mara. With a smirk, the seductress answers, “Well, that’s a healthy attitude to have. Just keep thinking about all those bitches you’ll have begging you for more while I fuck you, okay?” Mara giggles again, because if she wasn’t moaning she was giggling. It was kind of like an on/off switch. “Once you cum, I wanna get out of this dump as fast as possible.” 

“God, I know,” Mara mutters, her lips stick close enough to tickle Chantae’s nipple. She licks it a few more times, biting down softly once before going on, “These stupid knight trials took a year, on top of the three I already had with Master Smuhg.” Lick, bite, lick lick, kiss. “I want to be anywhere other than here as soon as elvenly possible.” Suck, suck, bite. 

Chantae laughs, not a light giggle like Mara’s, but a sultry bubbling from deep in her chest. *That* turned Mara on, to be perfectly honest. “Well, you won’t have to wait much longer,” Chantae says. “Let’s give you a nice, hard orgasm, then we can be off galavanting and looting and pillaging all we want, okay?” 

“Haha,” Mara responded without thinking, licking at the tit some more. Then, after a few more suckles, her cumbrain caught up with her. “Hold on, pillaging?” she asks, sounding like she didn’t get a joke or something. 

“Oh, you know what I mean,” Chantae says, patting Mara on the head in a subtle way to get her to keep sucking. She presses the tip of her thumb hard against Mara’s clit, forcing a moan out of the elf as she replied, “I mean name me a famous knight that could unambiguously be called a hero, you know? Warriors rape and pillage, that’s just how it is.” 

Despite the pleasure she was feeling, Mara couldn’t help but feel her inner Oswald absolutely horrified at that sentence. “W-well, it’s been a long time since the days of dragon queens,” she replies with a stubborn twinge to her voice, not letting Chantae push her face back down into the soft, warm heaven that was her amazing rack… god, those tits were so amazing, she wasn’t even wearing any support, how did she get them to be so- wait, what was she saying? Oh yeah, she was denying being evil, right. “The *last* thing I’m gonna do is rape someone, like are you kidding?” 

“Aw, sweetie,” Chantae says with a motherly lilt, cupping Mara’s cheek with the hand that isn’t ravishing her. “I’m sure every new knight says that, but trust me… You’re a strong warrior with the state at your back, no one would blame you for taking a bit of what you want every now and then.” As she speaks, her fingers are still roughly thrusting into Mara, pushing her more and more towards pleasure. It was honestly a very odd mix of emotions, hearing these words while her pussy feels so good. 

Chantae continues, “It’s fine for someone as important as you to get bored and wanna force someone to their knees every once in a while…” She hooks her fingers up to thrust right into Mara’s sweet spot, forcing a twitch through the elf’s body. “Press their face into your crotch as they struggle…” Her fingers get faster, a steady wet slapping being perfectly audible between her words. “Having your juices mix with their tears as you-”

“Stop it!” Mara shoves Chantae off her lap just as she was getting close. She did *not* want to let herself cum while listening to that shit, holy fuck. “What’s the matter with you!? That’s not what we’re doing! Oswald and I are here to help people, not- not whatever the hell *that* is!” Chantae just blinks up at her silently from her place on the floor, a bit of a shocked expression on her face as the elf berates her. “Are you only trying to find a knight to work for because you wanna fulfill your gross kinks!? Like hell I’m gonna go along with *that*!”

Chantae is quiet for a second, but then a smile spreads across her face. “Sweetie,” she says again, in her deep, sultry voice. She stands up, her full height seeming imposing to the small, seated elf, even if the woman was completely naked and Mara was still covered in her enchanted clothes. “You don’t need to stay up on that high horse, do you? Everyone knows knights are just sluts in armor, who only ‘help’ people to get their next lay.” 

“N-not like that!” Mara stammers out, pulling her robes over her chest, covering her dress and legs to keep this freak from ogling at her anymore. “I-I mean you’re wrong, there’s other reasons for people to help-”

“Oh, shut up,” Chantae snaps, taking a step towards the seated elf. “You’d get just as turned on by it as anything else and we both know it.” 

Mara doesn’t like where *this* is going! Whatever, she’s a fucking Grand Knight, like she’s gonna let some depraved courtier push her around. “Go to hell, creep.” She goes to get up and-

When did the whip wrap around her? How did Chantae- “What, trying to go somewhere?” the enchantress asks, the hilt of the whip in her hand now. Seriously, where did that thing come from? “Maybe I should just *show* you how much you’d like it. You know, from either side~.” 

Mara tries to move, to blast off a spell in Chantae’s direction, but she can hardly move at all. It was like the whip digging into her abdomen was paralyzing her. And with Chantae walking towards her like that…

Mara was only actually afraid for a second, though. A spear about twice the size of Mara’s body slammed into the wooden floor between her and the human, cutting the whip at the cord and keeping Chantae from walking forwards another step. Mara immediately jerked upwards, out of the chair she was in and to her feet, her hands boiling with magical energy in a second. Mara looks around to try and see what the fuck just happened, only to see the hobgoblin from before, towering behind Chantae, her hand still on the base of the spear. 

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Chantae asks amicably, turning to face the giant, golden-skinned goblin.  
Instead of answering, the hobgoblin plucks her spear out of the ground, steps between Mara and Chantae, and turns to look the enchantress in the eye. “Pull that shit again and the next one is going through your bitch head, got it?” the hobgoblin snarls at Chantae. 

Chantae looks… bored at that. No one even came, what was the point. She looks down at her limp, severed whip and mutters, “You’re the most boring person I’ve ever met, you know that Lydia?”

“Your shit opinions aren’t going to matter once you’re dead,” the hobgoblin spits back. “Get out of my sight before I fix your attitude permanently.” 

Chantae scoffs, drops her whip to the ground, and mumbles, “Didn’t even get to have any fun, for fucks sake,” before walking off, her latex and pasties magically reappearing on her body as she leaves. 

Lydia breathes out an angry sigh before turning and seeing… an elf on the ground, bowing like she was praying. “Wh-” is all the hob can get out before Mara stars shouting. 

“THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!” Mara screams from her prostrated position. “I don’t know what would’ve happened if you hadn’t shown up, I’ll do anything to make it up to you for saving me, thank you so, so, so much!!!”

Lydia looks down at Mara, blankly, before responding, “Make it up to me by never talking to me again. Bye.” She turns to leave. 

“Wait!” Mara springs to her feet and wraps her tiny hands around the hobgoblin’s wrists. Whoa, she was really buff… damn, why was Mara uninterested before, this lady is jacked, that’s super hot… Anyway, “Please, I really need a sideki- I mean a courtier, and you’re the only one left and I really, really want to-” 

“Stop,” Lydia says, cutting her off matter-of-factly. “If you only want me around because you think I’ll be what you thought she was, then save your damn breath and take a prostitute with you instead. I’m sure you can find plenty.” If there was anything the merc was opposed to, it was being someone’s sexy little fuck buddy. There wasn’t anything that’d disgust her more.

“No- no! It’s not that, I swear!!!” Mara gets back on her knees, pleading, “Please, that was just- You were amazing just now! You saved me and I want to travel with you so I can figure out a way to make it up to you!” Also she’d be fine with sexy fuck buddies at some point, but she was very happy to wait! After that little scare just now! Fuck, dude! “Please, I… I can’t imagine a better partner than someone like you, I’ll do anything if you’d reconsider!”

Lyida rolls her eyes and sighs. She knows she came here to be a good person or whatever, but god, she hated people being nice to her because of it. Wasn’t heroism supposed to be thankless, whatever happened to that? “I already told you what I want. Peace and quiet. Now, if you’ll excuse me-” 

Mara cuts her off by jumping in her path. She stares up at the taller woman with her big, bright, elven puppy dog eyes. “Please… I- I don’t know what’s out there, and I… I’m so used to having a partner around. If I’m alone out there, I’m scared of things like… that happening again…” When she wasn’t with Oswald, she was with Master Smuhg, or one of the orc guards from back home… she doesn’t remember the last time she was on her own. And she’d been so confident that she could fend for herself after being knighted, but maybe that was a bad idea… maybe she really needed someone watching her back. Someone who she picked because they knew how to fight and not because their titties were huge. “Please?” 

Lydia groans. “You don’t know what’s out there?” She can’t even take care of herself!? Why was she knighted in the first place then!? “Aren’t mages supposed to be intelligent and wise?” 

“That’s a very common misconception,” Mara whines, puppy eyes shining brightly again. 

Lydia furrows her brow. God dammit. “Give me a day, I’ll get back to you,” she says gruffly, before brushing past the mage and going on her way. 

“Thank you!!!” Mara says pathetically. Sure, she’d have to stick around town for another night, but if it meant having someone as cool and amazing as that sticking around, she’d go for it!!! “M-my name is Mara!” She just realized she forgot to ever say.

“Lydia,” the hob mutters as she wanders off. What the hell was she getting herself into…? 

\- - -

“Oh my god~!” Selby says happily, amazed at Sir Oswald’s skillful thrusting. “Do another!”

“Will do, squire!” Oswald holds his sword up high and does what he likes to call a Shining Chop at the training dummy set up in the guild’s training room. Why, what did you think was happening? 

Selby claps, cheering on Sir Oswald’s fighting techniques. “You’re amazing, Sir!”

As Oswald bows, Mara walks in, glancing over at the squire Oswald ended up with. They didn’t seem as bad when they were smiling, to be fair. Mara guesses she can leave Ozzy’s fat cock in good hands. Or, you know, whatever Selby has in their pants. “I’m back,” she calls out. 

Selby immediately clams up. They’d gotten caught up in the knight’s sword techniques, they forgot they were surrounded by virtual strangers. Damn their nerding out over combat techniques. “H-h-hello, Miss Mara… L-Lady! Lady Mara!”

Okay, Mara guesses that they could be *a little* cute when they were pathetic, too. “Just Mara’s okay! You don’t gotta worry about being formal with me, haha!” Trust her, she responds much better to ‘slut’ and ‘whore’ than ‘lady’ and ‘miss.’ 

“How did your rendezvous with Enchantress Chantae go, dear friend?” Oswald asks, stabbing the training sword into the dummy’s chest and leaving it there, turning his full attention to his compatriot. 

“Let’s never talk about Chantae again,” she immediately responds. “If I’m lucky, I’ll be able to convince Lydia to join me, though. She said she needed a night to think on it.” 

“O-oh…!” Selby mutters. Who knew Lydia would even talk to people, let alone agree to go with one? Selby was impressed she even left her room today… 

“The mercenary hobgoblin, correct?” Oswald asks, prompting a nod from Mara. He detected… a bit of an issue on Mara’s mind. Hm. “Well! I suppose one more night in the city for the two of us wouldn’t hurt!”

Mara raised her eyebrows. “The two of us? You’re not… leaving already?” It seemed like him and Selby were getting along so well, though.

“Nonsense! A true knight would never dishonor a friend by taking a day’s long unfair advantage, after all!” He pats Mara on the back, his armor gleaming in the torchlight. 

Mara pauses for a second… then smiles big up at Oswald. “Yeah, you’re way too much of a fuddy duddy to even dream of it, huh~?” She gives his helmet a teasing knock, but finds herself overwhelmingly relieved at his stalwart good intentions. Of course, if there was anyone she could rely on, it’d be him. “But tomorrow morning, I’m totally gonna kick your butt at princess-saving, you got it, buster!?”

“I doubt there will be one that needs saved *that* early, my dear,” Oswald says with a chuckle. “But yes. You are also, indeed, very much on.” 

Selby watches the two of them tease each other for a bit. They were excited to set out on the road with Sir Oswald, he seemed really cool and all, but… the way he was talking with Lady Mara… would he be okay just leaving her behind? They seemed like such good friends. Maybe even more… 

Well… they couldn’t be apart for very long. With everything at peace, they’d probably be back in each others’ arms in no time. Selby couldn’t help but smile a bit at the prospect of getting to know these two. 

\- - -

In a distant kingdom, dozens of paws clatter against desolate ground. 5 princesses watch over their army of wolves as they board airships and war-carriages, more than prepared for the realm-wide ambush at dawn. The youngest of the five drools sloppily as she giggles to herself. The 2nd youngest howled at the moon to get the soldiers’ blood pumping. The middle sister was busy going over the battle plans in her head, over and over again. The 2nd eldest was stroking her own tail to pass the time, bored by the whole endeavor. The eldest sister just watched the soldiers, making sure there wasn’t a single step out of place amongst the ranks. 

The Quiet Moonlight Kingdom was ready.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, Oswald and Mara take their first steps for their adventure: hiring courtiers, their sidekicks and closest allies on the road. Oswald ends up with the Squire Courtier, a meek human with a bit of a size difference compared to him. At first, Mara tries to recruit the Seducer Chantae, but when Chantae starts making her evil intentions known, the Merc Courtier Lydia steps in to save Mara. Mara is amazed by Lydia and convinces the gruff hobgoblin to join up with her party. At the end of the chapter, an upcoming struggled with an incredibly powerful kingdom is foreshadowed.  
> \- - -  
> Profile #2: The 2nd best erotimancer alive, Learned Grand Knight  
> Real Name: Mara  
> Species: Dusk Elf  
> Age: 22  
> Height: 5’0”  
> Hair: Brown  
> Skin: Dark Tan  
> Position: Switch, Vers  
> Love: 2, Lust: 6, Power: 1, Charisma: 3, Intelligence: 0  
> Turn-ons: Public Sex, Exhibitionism, Cum Play, Mutual Masturbation, Let's be fair: most things  
> Turn-offs: Edging, Prudes, Noncon  
> Ability - Erotimancy - Mara is a master of sexual magics, allowing her to perform weaker versions of almost any princess’s Lust Gift whenever she wants.  
> “The top student of everyone’s least favorite wizard, this dusk elf is a highly skilled mage with a near endless amount of sexy tricks up her puffy sleeves. This doesn't make her smart, though, please don't confuse her for an intelligent person.”


	3. The Big Bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Woken up in the middle of the knight (wink), Mara and Oswald have a princess to save!
> 
> Smut Rating: 1/5, only a small portion of this chapter involves sex, the rest is all action!

Oswald and Mara waved goodbye to Selby as the squire went to their own room at the courtier’s guild. The two of them would be staying the night there, just one more before their big adventure. Luckily, Lydia had made sure Chantae would not be on the premises while Mara was sleeping there, for which the mage was very thankful. Mara’d tried to tell Selby that they were happy to join the two of them in bed that night, but Selby simply turned around and walked back to their own room without saying a word in response, blushing the whole way. Mara remarked she was glad that Oswald had gotten the cute one. 

Before she could even get her legs spread, though, Oswald had a question to ask her once their door was closed behind them. “I can tell when something’s on your mind, friend,” he says. “Do you want to tell me what it is?” 

Mara didn’t realize until then that there even *had* been anything on her mind, but she guesses that there was. It had nothing to do with Chantae herself, Mara was fine ignoring that forever, especially since her big, bronze bodyguard seemed to have more than dealt with it. No, it was something a bit more personal… 

“Uh. I dunno,” she replied with a shrug, slowly setting herself down on the bed. “Maybe?” Mara wasn’t the type for deep, existential thoughts. She preferred being a bit more down to earth, leaving the big questions for other people. People probably thought she was weird for it, as a mage and all, but… ugh, it was so tiring. She just wanted things to be easy, like she was. Speaking of, “We can talk about it once you’re inside me, okay?” She reaches under her dress and pulls her panties off, all the preparation she needed for bed.

And Oswald, well… he also slept in all that armor. Was pretty alert about it, too, Mara'd tried prying that helmet off after he fell asleep once, and he snapped awake and held her above his head for half an hour as punishment. He rolls the eyes he probably has at Mara’s tendencies, but goes to her anyway, like he always did. He can poo-poo it all he wants, doesn’t change the fact he enables her every step of the way. Please do not judge him, she’s just very good at sex. 

After a moment, she’s on her back, he’s right over her, she’s pulling his cock out, and he’s hiking up her dress to get enough of her exposed. She wraps her arms around his neck lovingly as she feels him press softly against her folds, and then into her, filling her easily. She sighs happily next to where she assumes an ear exists, under that helmet. “I’m *so* gonna get to kiss you,” she whispers, immediately feeling more relaxed now that she’s being fucked.

Oswald thrusts himself forward a few times, gently but deeply, as he asks, “What’s been bothering you, Mara?” Not even going to grace that incorrect statement about her winning their bet with a response, because they both know it’s not happening. 

Mara huffs with indignation at being ignored, but tightens her grip on his body once she actually ponders the question. Why does she feel so weird about this? She already knew the answer to the question in her head… well, part of it, anyway. Ugh, she hates when things can’t just be simple. “We’re the good guys, right?” she asks quietly, slowly bobbing up and down as she’s penetrated. “Like… we’re going to help people no matter what, won’t we?” 

“?” Oswald is totally confused by that for a second, but then replies simply, “Of course we are!” He picks his pace up a bit, doing Mara just a bit harder as he continues, “We’re not just good, we’re great! Great Knights! The best protectors that the realm has to offer!” He plants a palm next to Mara’s head, a safer bet at intimacy than face-pets, considering the chainmail. Her breathing gets heavier. “Everything we’ve done up to now is to help people! To make the world a safer place! There’s no reason to believe anything else!”

Yeah… yeah, probably, right? She means, it was obvious that that much was true for Oswald. He would always be everything he was meant to be. And don’t get her wrong, Mara thought Chantae was disgusting, and she wanted nothing to do with the shit that woman wanted, but… she doesn’t know, maybe she’s not as righteous as Oswald was… She was a sex addict who studied fuck magic, not exactly the picture of honor…

“Mara.” She didn’t even realize she was looking away until he got her attention again by calling her. The pair’s movement had stopped momentarily, the words becoming more important than the pleasure. She looks back up at him, at the metallic surface she’d grown to see as a face of its own. “You’re amazing. I promise. I know you’ll do good because I know you are good. And you always will be.” 

...this asshole always knew what to say, didn’t he? Mara gave him a slight smile and hugged him tight again. “Yeah, well you’re perfect. Jerk.” And since he was so great, she’d just have to take his word for it. Being a good judge of character was probably one of his many talents, right? “Come on, what’d you stop for? Keep going before I fall asleep!” She reaches down and strokes the length of him that wasn’t still inside of her, feeling her wetness coating him. “I need this thick meat in me now~.”

“Well excuse me for taking the time for a friend in need!” Oswald faux-complains, beginning his rougher thrusting again, pushing her down into the mattress with his weight. 

“Excuse me for- nnf loving cock so much~.” She squeaks happily as Oswald picks his pace up more and more, sending jolts of pleasure up her spine. “Mm, fuck me~! Fuck me!” Mara lets all of the anxieties about imagined crimes melt out of her as she gives her mind over to her best friend. She gets what she wanted, and stops having to think about anything other than what a slut she is. She shouts and moans louder and louder, “MORE! HARDER, PLEASE HARDER~!” as she’s rutted, loving every second of it.

Meanwhile, as the evening went on, and as Mara’s screams of rapture leaked through the shoddy wood walls, Selby started to regret giving the pair the room right next to theirs. Selby, um… wasn’t getting any sleep until the two of them were done, were they…? Hm… :(

\- - -

By the time both knights had fallen asleep, Mara had discarded everything she’d been wearing other than her socks, and had her face pressed against Oswald’s chest as she laid on top of him. Oswald, of course, was fully decked out in his armor, but he put a pillow under Mara’s head once she’d started snoring. He’d learned to never fall asleep before she did for this very reason, because if she woke up with a sore neck there’d be hell to pay. Also because she’d try taking his armor off, once. Unforgivable. 

Selby had gotten a bit of a rest in the next room over, after clamping pillows over their ears. Chantae had been kicked out of the building, and who knows what Lydia was doing. Everyone that mattered was resting fine, up until screams and shouting started to be heard from outside. Sparse and quiet, at first, mistakable for the sounds of children at play. Granted, an odd sound to be heard in the middle of the night, but not immediate cause for alarm.

Then it got loud. Closeby. Accompanied with crashing and the crackling of flames. It wasn’t right away, nowhere near soon enough, but once the sounds of violence were unmistakable, Oswald’s eyes shot open. He sprang to his feet, sending Mara plummeting down to the mattress on her own, hard enough to wake her up. “Wh-what!? What’s happening, huh?” 

Even as she sputtered, though, Oswald was ready for action, his policy of always being prepared having paid off. He was halfway out the door already, and the only thing he had to say to Mara was, “Hurry.” 

Mara spent a good ten seconds groggy and confused, laying in place, before she processed the sounds outside and the situation, then scurried to her feet, muttering, “Shit, shit, shit,” over and over under her breath. She scrambled for her dress and robes, struggling to put them on while also following Oswald. The panic sort of made it harder, though, and she ended up leaving her room half-dressed, just clutching the rest of her outfit in one hand as she ran to the guild’s entrance. 

Luckily, Oswald hadn’t gotten far. He was still at the front door of the guild, obscuring himself from the outside against the inner walls. When he sees Mara come down, he presses a finger up to the spot on his helmet where his lips would be, and then motions with a thumb over his shoulder out the door, urging her to look. Still trying to zip her dress up in the back, Mara gets as close to Oswald as she can and glances out.

“Help!” a voice cries out, “Somebody, please!” There are countless figures out in the town, mostly of what seem like armed guards, but just two stand out above all the others. A soldier of some kingdom neither Oswald nor Mara are familiar with has a woman’s arms bound behind her back. Her dress and veil obscure her features, but it’s instantly recognizable what the woman is - the glimmering crown upon her head, the one that doesn’t budge at all no matter how much she shakes to get free of her captor, means she must be a princess. There was no denying it was a genuine one, either, even at a distance and even through the dark, the magical sheen of a true princess’s mark was unmistakable.

It was only after seeing her that Mara saw what was happening in the background. Armed men patrolling through the streets, people being dragged from their homes toward the central council building, storefronts being set ablaze amidst the chaos. This was a takeover. As far as Mara could tell, all of the lesser knights and guards keeping the city safe had been completely overwhelmed. Whoever this was, they’d sent a whole army. 

Mara’s teeth are gritted as she pulls her robe back over her shoulders, finally getting fully dressed. Well, fully dressed aside from her panties, which she’d dropped somewhere along the way. It’s fine, no one would notice unless she jumped or something. “What the fuck?” she growls in disbelief, completely taken aback by the sight. “Who are-”

“It doesn’t matter,” Oswald says, cutting her off. “There’s no time to waste, we need to save the princess. Two Grand Knights and a maiden of crown could be enough to take down any army.”  
Mara nodded. He was right, the guards were more or less scene dressing compared to the two of them, and some princesses had the kind of powers that would make them unstoppable with the proper protection. “What’s the plan?” 

“I’m rushing them,” Oswald says, slowly and quietly drawing his sword, making sure to keep it out of sight of the open doorway. “You sneak around while I distract the guard, and if I can’t talk him down, you take him from behind.”

“Why can’t you just cut him down!? You said yourself, these grunts can’t be a match for-”

“The princess’s safety is our top priority,” he says, interrupting her again. He needed to act now, or they could lose their chance. “She has to stay unharmed. Just follow my lead.”

“Wait, Os-!” Mara can’t finish, he’s already out the door, sword drawn and at his side. Was he really going to try and talk down an invading army after they’d already captured a princess? “Dude…” Mara didn’t like this. There wasn’t even supposed to *be* a princess here, what was she doing in neutral territory, away from her own palace? And why was an army attacking an unaffiliated city in the first place? What the hell was going on!?

“Unhand the royal, coward!” Oswald shouts at the guard holding the princess tightly. “Draw your weapon and face me like a true warrior!”

“Get him off me!” the princess screams, sounding teary-eyed. “Please, please help!” Even as he drew closer, Oswald still couldn’t discern the origin of this princess, but there were hundreds, so that didn’t mean much. She might’ve been recently crowned, too, it would explain why she was in neutral territory. Whoever she was, though, it didn’t matter, Oswald needed to get her safe before anything else. The rest of the citizens were as good as saved, with two Grand Knights and a princess working together. 

“Not a chance, tin can!” the brute holding her snarls. There’s a feral quality to his voice; he sounded more like a bandit or a wild animal than a soldier. “Just put yer poker down now before things get nasty!” He holds a jagged shortsword up to the princess’s veiled face, eliciting a shriek from the maiden.

“Harm a hair on her head, and yours will be on a pike,” Oswald retorts without swaying in his resolve. “I’m a Grand Knight of the Grand Tower Council, you stand no chance of survival against an all-out attack, good sir. Surrender while you’re able.”

“Fat chance!” the soldier spits back. The Princess tearfully reaches out for Oswald, nonverbally pleading for his rescue, a plea which he swears on his honor he will answer. “I hold all the cards here, you fancy pocket knife! Now drop the sword or else!” The eyes behind the soldier’s visor glisten brightly in the fire.

Oswald huffs. Does this front-liner think he stands a chance against a Grand Knight, even one without a weapon? That would be funny, in less dire straits. Oswald knows, however, that he could pummel the whelp into last Thursday with his bare hands, even without the stealthy mage he can see coming up behind the man. So for the princess’s sake, he lets his sword clatter to the ground, but keeps walking forward, cracking his knuckles as he approaches the goon. 

The soldier smirks and lowers his weapon momentarily, but then notices Oswald is moving just as fast towards him. “Hey, pal, what do you think you’re doing?” he asks. “Don’t come any closer, got it!?” He raises his weapon back up, pointing it directly at Oswald. “I’m warning you!”

Oswald doesn’t stop. He’s close now, just a few more steps away from where he needs to be to teach this clown a lesson. “Sorry for the wait, ma’am,” he says to the princess he’s about to rescue. “This will only take a second.”

“Sure will, dipshit.” Wait, that wasn’t the soldier’s voice. Oswald only realizes that a second before a large, canid leg shoots out the bottom of the princess’s dress and into his chest. The pawed foot plants itself in his core and rockets upwards, using the soldier holding her back as leverage to kick hard up into the air, sending Oswald skyward. Princesses did, indeed, have many unique abilities that could aid their knights, but sometimes all you really needed was to get jacked. 

More than just a kick, though, the princess’s attack sends Oswald soaring up into the sky in a high arc, flying up over the city walls and out towards the forest a few miles off. She leaps from her guard’s arms like a child leaping from a swingset at the highest angle they could manage to bring it to, ripping the dress and veil she’d been stuck in to shreds mid-air. Underneath, she was just as wolven as the rest of the soldiers, albeit with a distinctive crown around one ear. A tight, maroon one-piece clung tightly to her feminine curves, reminiscent of the fabled dragon bikinis of the old days. Her bared, sharp teeth glisten with drool, staining the brown fur of her jagged snout. And, as was probably apparent from the enormous leg she’d just used as a sneak attack, this princess was a big girl, approaching 8-feet tall. Not a dragon by any means, but she was as Big and as Bad as any of those useless old scalies were, anyway. 

She barks out a laugh that turns into a series of howling giggles as she regards the results of her trap. Well, her sister’s trap, it was one of their ideas, but she’d played the part so *damn well*! That idiot fell for it hook, line, and sinker! “Yehahehahaaa!” the Big Bad Wolf Princess howled into the waning moon, pleased as punch that she’d dealt with one of those nasty old Grand Knights so easily~! Now that just left one more…

“Heh,” the soldier barked out along with his princess, “I *did* warn him, didn’t I?” The princess didn’t react, she was too busy laughing maniacally. “Okay… so should I just gooooaaaUUGH!” He falls to the ground, landing in a heap next to the princess.

“Eh?” She turns around to see a little bit of smoke rising off her fallen guard, followed immediately by a tiny dusk elf rushing her, screaming. Ah, this must be the other one. Great! She didn’t even have to go very far. 

“RRRRAAAAHHHH!” Mara started running as soon as she saw Oswald get launched. She didn’t care if this bitch was a princess, she was going down for hurting Mara’ friend. Mara has another spell readied in her palm, gets ready to blast it right into the princess’s face, and-

-feels a big, furry fist hit her right in the stomach. “Cute,” is the last thing Mara hears before being punched straight up into the sky, right along with her friend, by the princess the two of them had been trying to ‘save’ in the first place. But hey, at least this large, evil dog thought she was cute!

Big Bad Wolf Princess sends Mara off the same way Oswald went, just with a different limb. Oh, and what’s that? Nice pussy, idiot, forget to clean your underwear before coming to fight? As she watches the knight and the knight’s bare taint go over the horizon, she howls, “SEEEEYAAAA! HAHAHEEHAW!!!” She’s *loving* this! She’s having the time of her life!!! Who knew taking over the realm would be so fulfilling!

“...spuh…” Oh, right, her guard. Well, he sounded alive, but he sure was in a heap. The princess rolled him over with her foot, examining him. Yup, still breathing! Big wet spot on his crotch, but hey, her too, that’s no big deal. This shit was exciting, after all! 

That makes this invasion a zero casualty, 10/10, PERFECT RUUUUUN!!! She throws her arms up into the air and howls again, a loud, triumphant, “AWOOOOOOOOOOO!!!” As the Big Bad Wolf celebrates, her soldiers continue to round up all of the new Quiet Moonlight Kingdom citizens up in the town hall or whatever it was. This ‘war’ was gonna be over in a night. Just the way BBW liked it. Less time fighting meant more time partying, ehahahehahe!!! 

The firelight glistens off her fur as she turns to face her new headquarters. She was gonna like it here, she could tell~.

\- - -

Mara wakes up next to a stream with a start, nearly bonking Selby on the forehead when she wakes up. “Yeep!” Selby makes a noise and then scurries off to the side, almost right into the river before Lydia keeps them steady with her foot. “Uh-uh-uh, h-hi, m-mis-LADY, Lady Mara…” She said not to call her that. Stupid Selby, stupid. 

“Wh-where? Where are we?” Mara asks, blearily trying to get to her feet before a sharp pain in her abdomen forces her back down to her knees. She looks around as she tries to blink sleep out of her eyes. It’s past dawn, it looks like, but just barely. Selby and Lydia are there, but where’s… “Oswald? Where is…?” 

“Shut up,” Lydia says rather forcefully. “God, you whine like a child.”

“She d-did, um… almost die…” Selby offers in Mara’s defense. Besides, it’s not like Mara was the one yelling and cursing every 5 minutes……wait, shit, she was asking about her best friend and also lover’s survival. “S-ssir Oswald’s okay! H-he’s m-making sure n-n-no wolves get us while you’re, um… recovering…!”

“Wh-wha…?” Wolves? What the fuck is going on? She’d barely been awake the last time, now she was dealing with this on top of all that. Ugh. 

“Just lay down until your boyfriend gets back, alright!?” Lydia barks. Not like a wolf would bark, just the gobliny kind.

Mara makes a grumpy face at Lydia and mumbles, “Not my boyfriend…” but lays back down in the grass anyway. It was… a lot better than trying to support her weight upright. “What are you two doing here?” she asks, feeling wet moss in her hair. Ew. “What happened to the city?” 

“We, um… snuck out, once we saw… what happened,” Selby answered meekly. “After what happened to you two… we, um… thought it’d be better if we regrouped instead of… uh…”

“Getting our asses kicked,” Lydia finished the sentence for them. “If that princess could send two Grand Knights flying with one hit, what are a wimpy kid and an out-of-practice merc going to do?”

“I’m twenty-three…” Selby mutters.

“The city’s sacked,” Lydia continues without paying that any mind. “Last we saw, all the civilians were holed up in the council chambers until the wolf guards swept the place and made sure there was no resistance left. You fucked up, everything’s fucked, congratulations.” She’s scowling down at the elf as if it was completely *her* at fault for what had happened. Maybe that’s just how Lydia looked at everyone. 

“Shit…” Mara whispers to herself. “How the hell is Selby older than me…?” 

“ARE YOU LISTENING!?” Lydia yells, stomping her foot down roughly next to Mara’s head and making Selby nearly jump into the river again. “A fucking feral army just took over the neutral capitol of the entire *realm* and declared war on *everyone*, and your concerns are SENIORITY!?”

“Dude, chill!” Mara snaps back incredulously. “We’re not going to get tricked by that dumb surprise attack bullshit twice! It’s one against four now, we can handle this!” She feels a sharp pang of pain in her ribs and mumbles, “As soon as I can stand again…”

“It’s more, um… l-like, uh… 1,000… against… three…” Selby stammers into their palms, trying to hold themself steady manually. 

“Yeah, yeah, but those soldiers are, like… who cares? The princess is the only one we need to worry about, whoever she is.” 

“She’s from the Quiet Moonlight Kingdom,” Lydia answers. “One of *five* daughters.”

“...” Well that… only changed things a little, right? “S-so what, we have two Grand Knights already,” Mara argues, “The other, what, eight? They’ll be around once they hear the news, we still have the numbers advantage.”

“They’ll probably be busy taking care of the *other* cities that are getting hit right now, actually.”

“...what?” Lydia has to be making that up, right?

“It was hard not to overhear those grunts bragging about it,” the hobgoblin responds, still with a decidedly miniscule amount of pity for Mara’s or anyone else’s conditions. She just seemed angry to have to be involved at all, like she’d rather have been another captive. “The wolves are trying to be the new dragons. They’re hitting everyone at once. They’re taking princesses to the towers and everything.” 

“...How!?” Mara yells back, sitting up again, pain subsiding to anger. “The kingdoms should’ve been stronger than ever after decades of peace, how the hell does *one* army take out every single other kingdom!? They have to have had a fluke with the council city, nowhere else is going to be-”

“They’re easy to knock over *because* of decades of peace, idiot,” the merc answers back. Selby, at this point, is cowering behind a rock as the two women scream at each other. “Everyone was getting complacent and relying on *you idiots* to keep them safe, and look at how that went! You think each individual kingdom and roving band of princess worshippers has a whopping two Grand Knights!? You just said there were only ten *at all!* Sure, maybe one or two princesses can hold their own for a bit, but an army this well-prepped has everyone else *fucked*, Mara! Everything’s gone to shit!”

“Well!!!” Mara only has that to offer. She has no retort, because if what Lydia’s saying is true, what the hell can *she* do about it!? She’s just one person. And if Lydia’s wrong… well, then she agreed to hire a crazy person as her courtier, and that’s no fun. 

“Well then we’ll un-shittify everything ourselves!” a strong voice calls out gleefully from behind her. Mara turned and saw Oswald standing proudly by the river…… with a huge dent in his helmet.

“BAH! Dude, your face!” Mara just saw the whole helmet as his head, there was nothing underneath that. 

“Just a scratch!” Oswald hums back to her. “Hit a branch on the way down, hoho, but nothing a bit of spit-shine can’t fix!” Mara feels like she hit the same branch, but she wasn’t the one wearing full platemail, so… “Listen, if these wolves want a fight, we’ll simply give it to them! Maybe not head-on, and maybe not all at once, but we can accomplish anything with a strong and determined spirit!”  
While Selby seems totally in awe of Oswald’s bravery, Lydia just scoffs and says, “You can’t be serious, can you?” 

“Oh, of course I am~!” the knight says. “It’s classic knightery, as a matter of fact. In the days of the dragons, knights would simply save princesses from their towers until the big bad dragoness herself would come to confront them! Then they’d either fight her and her army down…”

“Or seduce them into defeat!” Mara finished for him. They’d learned that kinda stuff together during the trials! She’s proud of herself for remembering! “He’s right! All we have to do is whittle away at them a little at a time until we can take them off guard! We can still keep people safe!”

“And according to Selby’s report,” Oswald continues, ignoring Lydia’s glare, “The wolves are only taking captives to maintain dominance. They don’t seem interested in killing any of the citizens themselves, no matter what they have planned for the knights and royals…”

“So we act fast!!!” Mara shoots to her feet, ignoring the pain and throwing a fist into the air. “We make sure we save as many princesses as possible, defeat the wolves, and everything will be okay!” Much easier said than done, but… Oswald had a way of making her believe she could do anything, to be honest. 

“Indeed we do!” he calls back to his companion. “And we all do it together! Or at least in two separate groups of together, to cover ground more quickly. But together!”

“Together!” Mara announces happily, echoing his enthusiasm.

“T-tog-gether…!” Selby offers hopefully, but relatively weakly compared to the two knights before them.

“. . .” Lydia does not engage in this tomfoolery. 

“Madame,” Oswald tells her. “I will not force you to join our crusade, especially seeing as its one for the sake of altruism alone, with no monetary gain to speak of.” Really selling it there, Oz. “But I for one would feel much more at ease were I to know you were lending arm to-”

“Just don’t be a pussy, shithead!” Mara chipped in, egging Lydia on. 

“Oh fuck you!” Lydia snaps back. Why the hell did she get herself involved in this stupid bullshit!? The wolves weren’t even that violent, she’s sure they had some good points to back up their takeover, maybe they were benevolent? Anything had to be better than these bozos, thinking they could topple a well-planned revolution with just the four of them. “Ugh! If I weren’t being forced to I’d never want to go near any of you for as long as I lived!” 

“But?” Mara asked.

“...but also I don’t want to be around you right now, anyway. And the only reason I’m going to be is because-”

“Yay!!!” Mara wasn’t going to let her finish.

“IT’S EITHER THAT OR PROBABLE EXECUTION-” Lydia’s gonna try anyway.

“YAY SHE LIKES US MORE THAN DYING YAY!!!” Mara screams, drowning her out as best as she can.

“SHUT UP YOU RANCID SKANK, YOU’RE THE ONE WHO’D DIE WITHOUT ME AROUND!!”

“SHE LOVES US SO MUCH!!!”

Oswald smiles under his helmet as he watches this sure-fire life-long friendship unfolding before him. Selby seems utterly wonderful to be around, and Lydia and Mara would surely make fast allies. He’s content with the scene in front of him, even if his head is still killing him after that fall from earlier. Hopefully… the first princess he rescued would be of a clerical nature. That would be of great help…  
In the meantime, though, he’s more than content to just prepare for adventure with his allies and friends. There’d be a long road ahead, assuredly, but they’d be able to handle it. Eventually.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Profile #3: Quiet Moonlight Kingdom’s, Big Bad Wolf Princess  
> Real Name: ???  
> Species: Wolfkin  
> Age: 21  
> Height: 7’9”  
> Hair: Pink  
> Fur: Brown and Blonde  
> Position: Dom, Vers  
> Love: 1, Lust: 4, Power: 4, Charisma: 2, Intelligence: 0  
> Turn-ons: Sex Parties, Casual Nudity, Leashes, Being Loud, Being Rough  
> Turn-offs: Missionary, Breeding, Mommy Doms  
> Heirloom: Wolf Queen’s Earring - In the princess’s possession, she can hear her close allies’ whispers from any distance. In a knight’s possession, it’s 1/5th of what’s needed to summon her majesty.  
> Lust Gift - Bad Girl’s Leash - Whoever is hooked up to the end of this thing has three times the strength and endurance they normally do, but only when horny.  
> “The youngest of the wolf sisters, this bad girl likes to party and have fun first, take responsibility for anything later. She just goes along with whatever her family tells her to do…”


	4. Splitting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mara and Oswald concoct a plan and split up to rescue princesses - Selby gets along with Oswald much better than Lydia does with Mara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut Rating - 1/5, there's a short excerpt of explicit content, but most of this chapter is story progression. It'll be made up for in the next chapter, don't worry. 
> 
> Anyway does anyone else writing running stories kick themselves really hard at longer than average chapters, because this one was much harder to edit than anything else... especially bc its almost no porn TToTT  
> At least the next one that'll be this long is mostly porn, even if its way more self-indulgence than anything else XD. That won't be for a few chapters, though, so... I hope someone likes it lol

“But wouldn’t it have been… better? To travel with everyone at once?” Selby asks quietly as they sit beside Sir Oswald. They were both in the front seat of a carriage that Mara had summoned for them. Selby’s never seen someone turn a few twigs and leaves into a fully functional wagon with a flick of their wrist before… especially not… with the adult horses pulling it around included… But that’s a Grand Knight for you. Mara must’ve been one of the best wizards out there, huh? 

“Safety in numbers is for the inexperienced and unconfident, dear squire!” Oswald answers happily. “But Mara and I will serve the realm better by covering as much ground as possible in as short a time!” He gives his courtier’s head a few pats, which immediately makes Selby turn their head away from him to hide the intense blushing it causes. “The four of us hardly need the extra help, eh~? More than capable, my friend, more than capable!”

“I g-g-guess that, um, d-does mean, uh, s-saving people t-t-twice as f-fast…” Snap out of it Selby, it was just a few headpats. You *cannot* get this worked up every time he does that. Deep breaths. In, out. Okay, they think they’re good now. “Won’t you… miss Lady Mara, though…?” Those towers that Lydia said the wolves would be taking the princesses to were several days apart by wagon… Even if they regrouped after each princess saved, that would be weeks at a time where the two were apart. And as far as Selby could tell, Oswald and Mara sort of… loved each other? Like, they hadn’t said that, or anything, but the way they acted together… they had to at least have a platonic bond that was strong enough to be called love.

Oswald hums to himself for a second at the thought, but then answers as cheerily as he always does, “I’d rather things get back to normal more swiftly so I won’t need to worry about her at all, hahaha.” The laugh was just a smidge less joyous than his normal jaunty announcements, but the situation *was* kinda oofy, to be fair. 

Selby nods. “I… guess that’s true, huh…?” Sir Oswald seemed to have the answers for everything, didn’t he? Selby guesses that just means they’re in good hands, though. They have to admit, they are a lot more at ease around him than most people. He seemed to have that effect on everyone, as far as Selby could see. “Do you think the two of them will be alright on their own, though…? Mara and Lydia, I mean…?”

“. . .” A bead of sweat dripped down Oswald’s helmet somehow. “They’ll… be safe from the wolves,” he answered honestly. 

Selby… looked down at their lap. “Y-yeah, I… know what you mean…” 

\- - -

Meanwhile, the thing that he meant was happening. Lydia was the one driving the wagon while Mara sat in the back by herself. Neither woman wanted to be too close to the other, a tense atmosphere separating them ever since they’d been alone with one another. Don’t get her wrong, Mara’s still thankful to Lydia for saving her back at the guild, but fuck, the woman would just not lighten up! Talking to her was like trying to pet a rabid cat!

“So you’re a transmutation wizard, right?” Lydia asks, breaking the silence with a judgemental tone, as if on cue. At least she was just being grumpy instead of directly insulting Mara, for once. Let’s see how long that would last.

“Nope,” the elf answers honestly, “Don’t know why you’d think that.” She guesses her reputation doesn’t precede her enough for people to know what kind of mage she was quite yet. 

“Because you pulled a whole cart out of your ass, don’t be dense!” Yep, there it was. Mara was starting to think it was impossible for the woman to say anything nice. “Ugh, whatever, so a summoner then?” 

“Nnnnnope.” Mara *could* just tell her what brand of magic she used, but that would be polite. And Lydia, as it turned out, didn’t really deserve it.

What the fuck. Was this going to turn into some kind of guessing game? Fuck this. Lydia hates how smarmy Mara is. The situation was serious, but she’s over here trying to be all cute and bratty, being all selective with her info. Bitch. “Well I saw you fire off an attack at that soldier before, are you a destruction specialist or some shit!?”

“No, not that either.” Mara was totally fine with this turning into a guessing game, actually, she had no respect for Lydia’s time and mental energy. 

The hobgoblin’s brow furrows. “Illusionist?”

“No.” 

“Mystic?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Thaumaturgist!?”

“Pfft, what? No, never.” 

“God fucking dammit, are you a warlock!?”

“You’re bad at this.”

“WELL THEN WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU!?” Lydia cracks the reins she’s holding in frustration, making the horses Mara conjured out of the aether both whiney with annoyance. Like jeez, lady, chill out, we’re just doing our jobs. “Would you stop playing stupid games and just tell me what I have to deal with so we both don’t get killed in our first combat encounter!? Fuck!”

Mara pauses after Lydia’s yelling, then just coos, “...you want a hint~?”

“FUCK OFF!” Lydia roars in reply.

Lydia’s grumpiness doesn’t phase Mara in the slightest, however. In fact, she has a smirk on her face as she decides to give her hint anyway~! Because she’s nice~! “I, my dear hobgoblin, am the 2nd most powerful user of my school of magic in the entire world.” Mara wiggles her eyebrows to emphasize how cool that makes her. “The only wizard more skilled in it than me is the person who taught me, as a matter of fact~!”

Stupid fucking… elf games… “And who would that be?” Lydia asks with a sneer.

“Oh, I don’t know if you’ve heard of him,” Mara answers smugly, “He was only one of the players behind the defeat of the dragons in the last tower war!” Which is now the first of two, technically. Weird. “You know, the legendary wizard Smuhg?”

If Lydia was driving a car, she’d slam on the breaks right now, but since the horses are doing most of the work, all she can do is whip her head around and shriek, “You’re a FUCK MAGE!?” 

“Um, rude? It’s called erotimancy.”

“MotherFUCKER!” Lydia yells as she turns her head back towards the road. “Of all the useless shit- How did you even get knighted in the first place!? How did they even let you apply!?” As Mara huffs at Lydia’s disapproval, the merc realizes something and adds, “What the hell does summoning a wagon have to do with sex!?”

Oh, that was actually a good question! To which the answer is… “I dunno…” Lydia snarls a snarl of fury. “I always thought it was kinda weird we learned that one. Seems kinda out of place.”

Gripping the reins tightly, desperately trying to keep herself from attacking the horses out of frustration, Lydia growls, “This is going to be the dumbest quest of all fucking time, isn’t it?” Mara just nods. It probably would be. But hey, that’s the fun of it!

\- - -

They’d been traveling for hours, at this point. Selby had been asking Sir Oswald a few questions over the course of their traveling, about his skills as a knight, about Mara, about… Okay, Selby couldn’t think of anything else to ask about because of their nerves, so… they mostly just talked about fighting and Mara. Sometimes both at once. But conversation ran dry fast, and for an hour or so of riding, the two of them had just been sitting in relative silence, with Sir Oswald’s occasional cheery hum the only thing breaking up the silence. 

Silence meant anxiety. Selby was nervous about seeming too uninteresting and having Sir Oswald get bored of them and wanting a new courtier, which was a ridiculous sentiment, because that would never happen, but what if it happened!? So after a while, they cleared their throat and muttered the only thing they could think to say in the hour they’d been trying to find words, “S-so, um… do you… travel often?” Smooth. 

Oswald perked up a tiny bit when Selby spoke, and Selby took it as a sign that they should definitely be talking more to keep him happy. In actuality he’d just been dozing off a bit… It *was* boring out here, but that’s not Selby’s fault. “Aha!” he says, snapping out of his nap, “Well, for knight training purposes, I’ve been in the capitol for quite some time! But I do admit, as a younger lad, I was on the road more frequently than not.” That was the most detailed snippet of his past Oswald had offered so far. 

“O-oh, r-really…?” Well, it explained how he knew to steer a horse around. “Do you, um… have any tips for… passing the time, then?” Selby wishes they’d had the time to grab a book or two from their room, but after Lydia said they needed to hurry, all they could even think about grabbing in the heat of the moment were their tents. 

“Hmm.” Oswald scratches the part of his helmet under his chin, “Well, with so few supplies, there’s only so many possibilities for enrichment.” Hopefully they’d come across a travelling band of merchants at some point. That was… relatively common? “Things like casual hunting or swimming aren’t entirely options due to the urgency we’re facing… I’m missing my weapon, so sparring is out of the question…” Selby sweats a bit at the idea that sparring was ever in the question in the first place. “I… suppose that there’s always Mara’s favorite activity…” 

“What’s Mara’s favorite activity?” Selby asks innocently. 

Oswald only responds with a telling silence. 

After a few moments of contemplation, during which they remember what Mara acted like, Selby flushes, snaps their head away and stammers, “A-Ah! Th-that! R-r-righ-ri-uh, right…!” That wasn’t! Something that’d crossed their mind up to now!

...That often.

Oswald plants his hand on Selby’s head again, ruffling their hair comfortingly and saying, “Don’t give it more thought than you’d like, dear squire, your comfort is top priority!” He’s assuming that Selby isn’t really the, uh… the type to engage with Mara’s usual tendencies. They didn’t seem… They didn’t seem like a slut, is all. “I shan’t bring up topics you’d find less than suitable any more than necessary!”

While Oswald was trying to reassure Selby that he wasn’t going to be perverted towards them, Selby’s mind was buzzing with the feeling of his hand on their head. Their blush doesn’t go down at all - if anything, it increases. Oswald’s been giving out headpats like candy all day, and they can’t… they… Listen, ever since Selby can remember, they’ve found head-petting… really… it turns them on, okay? And the fact that they’ve idolized knights their whole life combined with their, uh… slightly unorthodox kink… it was just. This was too much. Oswald was trying to gently let them know that things wouldn’t get too lewd for their liking, meanwhile they were struggling not to show how horny he was making them. This was awful! Why were they like this! Ahhhhh!

Oswald, for his part, only noticed a bit of discomfort with the subject at hand (bad-dum-tsh), so he quickly changed it. “How about a rousing game of eye-spy!” he suggests, patting them one more time squarely on the back, helping snap them out of it just a bit. “That’s sure to keep us on our toes, eh? Go on, search for something interesting past the treelines, give me your best shot! I’ll warn you, though, I’m very well versed in these woods, hoho!”

“R-r-right, y-yeah, okay…!” Thank god, road trip games were just about the least horny thing Selby could imagine. Bless Oswald’s heart. “O-okay, um… I-I spy with, um…. my eye… s-something, uh… something… green?”

“. . .” Oswald turns his head towards the woods they were riding next to. Hm. “Is. Is it trees?”

“Y-yeah…” 

“. . .” Bless Selby’s heart. “Let’s try a different game.” 

\- - -

Mara got bored fast. She’d tried talking to Lydia already, and that turned out great, obviously. So now they were both just quiet, avoiding even thinking about each other’s existence for a while. And hey, what do you know, riding in the back of a carriage for hours on end with no possessions and nothing to talk about ended up being hell. It was so fucking boring, god! Luckily, Mara’s *favorite activity* was never too far off~.

It wasn’t until she leaned back in her seat and lifted her dress up a bit that she’d remembered she didn’t have any panties on. Haha, right, she’d dropped them back at the guild, she was kinda stuck going commando now, wasn’t she…? You’d think she’d have noticed sooner, with each cool breeze sending shocks up her body, but to tell you the truth… this wasn’t a rare enough occurrence for Mara to have consciously noticed. She went without panties all the time, and usually with shorter hems than the one her current dress was sporting. It’s not that she didn’t notice all those tickly sensations she was getting, being out in the open air, it’s just that they came by so frequently in her normal life that they didn’t register as out of place. Whoops!

Welp, no need to kiss a gift horse on the dick. She lifts her skirt up above her hips, exposing the bare body underneath more readily to the winds. She prods gently with one finger at her bare pussy, pretty cold and dry feeling after being out all day. Well, it was gonna be anything but in a second~.

She rubs her middle finger in circles around her folds, not stopping at any particular spot yet, just casually feeling around, savoring the feel of skin on skin. She reaches down further until she finds her slit, already starting to get moist, and gives a few rubs around the opening, just softly, just gently. She’ll build up to a more rapid pace later, for now she needed some relaxing gentleness. 

Finally, though, she dips her finger inside, feeling her own slick walls pushing down on it. She easily pushes as far in as her hand will take her, down to the knuckle, before pulling out slowly, beginning to softly fuck herself. Her other hand joins the fun, resting at the top of her crotch and trailing an index finger lightly against her clit. She only has to press down lightly before it sends shivers up her spine. Mara was often in awe of how no matter what new spells for sexual gratification she learned, no matter how many ways she could fuck herself mad with toys, no matter how many intense or unique positions she was put in with Oswald or Master Smuhg, she could still find so much pleasure in the simplest act of touching herself. She was sort of amazing, when you thought about it. 

She lets a second finger slip inside as her other hand presses down harder, rubbing her clit in slow circles. She makes a V-shape with the two digits penetrating her, making her bite her lip as her walls were pushed out around them. As she let a dribble of spit fall from her mouth and against her clit, making the rubbing there even more enjoyable, she started picking up the pace. She thrust into herself faster, pressed down on her sensitive, brown nub harder, started thrusting her hips forward a bit. But when she let a quiet, lust-filled moan escape from her soft lips… 

“What the fuck are you doing!?” Lydia barks, having finally noticed the scene behind her once Mara started making noise. She did not sound happy to find what she found. 

“Getting off,” Mara answers breathily, not even slowing down after being discovered. Her head is turned away from Lydia, her eyelids lowered as she focuses on the sensation of herself. In her defense, she probably can’t pick up on Lydia’s anger right away.

“WELL KNOCK IT OFF!” the mercenary roars. Okay, yeah, that got through to Mara. The elf jumps in her seat, focusing an annoyed glance onto her courtier. “I’m right fucking here, what the shit is the matter with you, stop it!!!” Lydia seemed more upset at this than anything else Mara’s done so far.

“Why?” the elf asks, spitefully continuing her self-pleasure. She even speeds up, spreading her legs more as she glares Lydia in the eyes, causing wet sounds to fill the air between the two. “I’m not hurting anyone. Just ignore it if you don’t want to-” Mara’s sentence is cut off by a boot flying at her head, which just barely misses, landing safely on the floor of the carriage. “HEY WHAT THE HELL!?”

“I said. Stop. It.” Lydia speaks with a calm, murderous rage behind her voice, her eyes darkening as she bares her teeth at the dusk elf. If her looks are anything to go off of, the next thing she’ll throw is her spear, and she’s not going to stop until Mara’s decent again. 

“God, what the hell!?” Mara screams as she pulls her dress back down over her now-soaking vagina. “Why can’t I fuck myself!? It’s *my* fucking wagon!” She does have a point, she even made the horses herself. 

“Because I told you not to.” Even with the shameful display of mage pussy hidden, Lydia still seems close to a snapping point as she scowls at Mara and says, “And if you try that shit when I’m around you again, you’ll be fighting wolves by your god damned self, do you *understand* you stupid whore?”

What! The fuck! Was her problem!!! “I don’t understand your shitty attitude!” Mara spits back at her. “Why are you going so fucking apeshit all of a sudden!? I was leaving you alone!”

Lydia ignores Mara’s whining, snarling back, “Don’t. Do it. Again.” Then she just turns back to looking at the road, keeping an ear out for anyone being a horny creep in her general vicinity. 

“Bitch!” Mara shouts incredulously. She should be able to touch herself whenever she wants!!! She should be allowed to do whatever she pleases, go to hell you freakishly tall prude!!! Instead of defying the order, though, Mara just folds her arms in front of her and seethes. Her brow is furrowed and her mind is racked with what an awful partner and person Lydia is for making her stop having fun. She’s the epitome of Pouting Brat for a good five minutes after the exchange. 

...and then she starts trembling. 

\- - -

Selby is in Hellby. 

It seemed that Oswald was a veritable factory of headpats. If Selby won a round of their guessing game, their trophy was a headpat. When they worked together to catch a jelly ooze for that night’s dinner, Selby got a headpat for good teamwork. They sneezed!!! And Oswald didn’t have a handkerchief! So he gave them a headpat as an apology!!! What was with this guy!? 

By the time it was getting dark and Oswald had decided to set up camp for the night, Selby was so horny they could hardly think straight. Their scalp was buzzing, their cheeks were almost permanently flushed, and all they could think about was how as soon as these tents were up and they had some privacy, they were going to masturbate until their crotch was numb. And then Oswald would probably wander over in his sleep and give them a headpat for cumming. Like, with his pajamas over his armor… a sleep mask covering his visor… That was… a really funny image. “Heh… heheh…” 

As Selby laughed to themself next to the wagon, Oswald came up from behind them and announced, “The firewood has been procured!”

“HEEP!” Selby snaps out of their trance and slips over, landing in a heap on the ground and then twitchily struggling to their feet, muttering, “Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!” the whole time. 

“Hm.” Oswald sets the logs he’d acquired on the wagon bed and examines his courtier closely. “Are you rather alright, dear squire?” He’d definitely noticed something was up with Selby today, but hadn’t been able to put his finger on it for the life of him. But their cheeks were red and they’d fallen over a few times, so it couldn’t be anything good. “If you feel unwell, you should sit. Just let me set up the campfire, eh?” 

God he was so pure why did he have to be like that? Selby wouldn’t be nearly as attracted to him if he wasn’t so damn nice. “I-I”m okay…!” they say, not sounding overly convincing. “J-just stress from, um… you know…” They wave their hand noncommittally. “I-I can still do the campfire! I-I’m better at campfires than tents, I should be the, uh… I can do it…!” They reach out for a log and head over to the little rock ring they made while thinking about what their knight’s cock looked like I mean what they weren’t doing that uh shut up log. 

As Selby turned back towards the campsite, seeming to have flushed even worse, Oswald just hummed to himself. They clearly felt sick, but they were carrying on working anyway. Such a brave soul. “Just promise to lay down as soon as things feel like they’re getting too much for you, alright?” Oswald offers in a soft voice as he heads over to pitch the tents. “You deserve rest just as much as anyone, especially because you’ve been so helpful today.” 

Oh no oh god he was thanking them it was coming wasn’t it? Please no they can’t take any more they’re so pent up already please. Despite wincing at his words, though, Selby feels no headpat come, and turns their head to see Sir Oswald setting up the first of two tents. They breathe a sigh of relief and kneel over to get the fire started. As long as they didn’t get any more headpats before they could get some privacy, everything would be fine. They just had to think about anything other than his big, strong fingers sliding along the top of their head, mingling with their hair as he told them how good they were doing… his soft touch pressing down on their scalp as they get praised, their heart beating harder because of how close together they were… feeling lucky that such a brave and strong knight could be so gentle and kind with them... 

What were they thinking about again…? “Selby, your hat is on fire…” Oswald says plainly as he finishes pressing the last tent peg into the ground.

“Huh?” Oh, the campfire, they’d started it somehow. Oh, their head was drooping, how silly of them, haha! Oh, their hat is- AH THEIR HAT IS ON FIRE. “BWAH!!!” Selby slaps their own head a few times to try and put it out, realizes that that wasn’t working, then shoves the hat off their head and… into the fire… shit. “Bwow…” They did a bad… 

“It’s alright, dear squire,” Oswald says, coming up behind them. “We’ll buy you a new one as soon as we’re able!” Selby’s eyes go wide. They feel his gauntlet approaching. They dodge-roll to the side, ending up on their feet on the opposite side of the campfire as Oswald. Meanwhile, Oswald… stares. Why did. They do that?

“Ahaha!” Selby stammers, looking around nervously. “Boy, I sure am hungry, what do we have to eat again~? Haha~!”

“Ah!” But of course, they were simply getting ready for dinner! Perfect seating positions, he should’ve known! “I’ll delay in the construction of my own tent until after the feast, then, hoho!” He heads back over to the wagon. “Food will be ready in just a moment!”

Selby breathes a sigh of relief. That was a close one. They’re so pat-brained right now the smallest hair-poke would set them off. They eye the tent Oswald had already set up. It was right there, their one safe haven. All they had to do was eat fast, excuse themself before Oswald had a chance to get up, and they were good to go. They could fuck themself into kingdom come and steel their heart against whatever would happen tomorrow. They were prepared now, they could handle it. They just had to get through dinner. 

\- - -

Mara had been quiet for a while. She’d called Lydia a bitch and then she hadn’t made a peep since. Lydia thinks that’s just fine. If she was going to be a snotty little brat about everything, that was her problem. When Lydia had decided to pull over into a clearing for the night, only once the horses couldn’t see in front of them anymore, she’d grabbed the tents and went to set things up by herself, without a word. She didn’t ask for any help because she’s assuming Mara doesn’t have tent or log spells, since all she cares about is dick and pussy. And wagons. 

Lydia was halfway through setting up camp when Mara climbed down off the wagon. Her face wasn’t bearing the usual, self-satisfied smirk that it usually had. She actually looked kind of sullen. Mara looked over to see Lydia already on the 2nd tent and slowly walked over to the larger woman. “Hey…” she offered quietly. “Do you, like… need help with anything?”

Lydia glanced up at her for a second. The mage seemed kinda off, but Lydia’s only known the woman for a day, so who is she to be a judge of what is and isn’t normal for this bitch? “Not unless you can cook up one of those horses you made for supper.”

Mara glances back over at the two horses she made out of twigs and leaves. Their eyes were vacant, their skin smelled of sawdust, and their hooves made no noise upon the ground they walked upon. Their stares sent black, icy shards up the spines of whatever unfortunate souls happened to make eye contact. “I mean yeah, probably,” Mara says, shrugging her shoulders at the horrors of life. “Not really a cook myself, though, so… maybe not me, specifically…” 

“Well then no,” Lydia remarks, focusing her attention back on the task at hand. “You can’t. Just stay out of the way, alright?” 

Mara frowns. She didn’t… ugh!!! Serious things sucked!!! Why did she have to do this every other day, piss shit hell damn! “I… wanted to, um… apologize.” Lydia’s pointed ears twitched. She stops what she’s doing to turn back around and stare at Mara, but doesn’t say anything. Her eyes silently ask what the fuck Mara was about to be on about. Mara, in turn, nervously fidgets with her robe’s pockets. Man, Lydia just had to make this even harder for her, didn’t she? “F-for back on the wagon… earlier?”

Lydia continues to glare into Mara’s nervous eyes. “Go on, then,” the hob states evenly. Let’s hear what you think you did wrong, slut. 

“. . .” Mara still thinks Lydia sucks, especially for behavior like this, but that doesn’t change the fact that she was the one who probably fucked up, not the mercenary, so… “I… crossed some boundaries before. I, uh… I get that now. And I didn’t react properly to, like… being called out, so… I get why that was shitty of me.” She looks like a child getting scolded for stealing cookies, but her voice sounded sincere. And she *was* being sincere, she’d almost immediately regretted the way she’d acted, she just… hated having to apologize. She wishes there was a way to just psychically transplant her sorryness into other people’s heads… She should’ve been a psycher, why did she choose fuck magic…? 

She needs to take a deep breath before continuing, “I promise not to do that stuff around you anymore, okay? Keeping it to myself is the least I can do after everything you’ve done for me, so… y-yeah…” She felt like an idiot standing here like this, having to say how sowwy she is. God. 

Lydia’s brow furrows as Mara talks, and as the mage tapers off, the merc’s expression doesn’t soften. Once Mara’s done talking, she just stares back at Lydia for a few seconds, anxiously waiting for a response of any kind. After several seconds of silence, Lydia just says, “Fine,” then turns her attention back towards setting up the tent, as if nothing had changed. 

“F-fine?” That was it? That was all she had to say?

“Yes. Fine,” Lydia confirms. “Stick to your words and I’ll probably forgive you. Until then, either sit down or make yourself useful. We need sleep if we want to be ready for any wolf soldiers we come across.” 

“...Okay.” Well that was… anticlimactic. Mara’s okay with that, she guesses. Not the worst that this could’ve gone. She just… really didn’t want to end tonight feeling like Chantae was right, that she should feel entitled to her own pleasure at the expense of everyone else. And maybe things between her and Lydia could be… fine? At least? Probably wouldn’t end up as friendly as her and Oswald, but a stable working relationship was ideal, if they were going to be saving the world together. 

Whatever. It’s fine now, everything’s fine. Mara decides to try and see how those twig horses will cook up, seeing as she can just make more tomorrow morning. Fingers crossed that they don’t have termites! As she walks off, she actually manages a bit of a smile, hoping that things between her and her courtier will look up soon.

\- - -

Selby was so, so close. Their food was done, the fire was low, and Sir Oswald seemed just as ready for sleep as Selby was ready to fuck their own brains out. Everything was prepared. It was time. Selby slowly stands up, making sure not to wobble to give Oswald anything to worry about, and then says, “Well I think I’m pooped for tonight, ha…!” Just act natural. Give him a wide berth, get to your tent, and rip all of your clothes off, simple as that. “I’ll be sure to be up bright and early tomorrow morning, sir! G-good night!”

“Well then! Have pleasant dreams, friend Selby!” Oswald says amicably. Selby cheers in their head, thinking they’re finally free. “Ah, but before you do-” MOTHERFUCKER! “-would it be okay to ask for just a moment?” 

Selby turns to face him with a rosy smile, saying, “Sure, what did you need~?” They’re so fucking upset holy shit. 

Oswald stands up and approaches the squire, which was the last thing Selby wanted right now. He says, “I just wanted to thank you for all the hard work you’ve done today.” Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no, this is only going to end one way, isn’t it? “No one forced you to come out here with us on this mission, but you’re still here. And not only are you brave for that, but doing so much while you’re clearly not feeling well shows a true commitment to the cause that I couldn’t have rightfully expected out of anyone.” Selby whimpers to themself. They could *not* take this shit right now, it was basically spot-on with a fantasy that’s played out in their head for years, it was seriously too much. 

“So from the bottom of my heart, Squire Selby,” Oswald says as Selby braces themself, clamping their eyes shut. “I look forward to working alongside you in our quest for peace.” Selby waits… and waits… and then opens a single eye… Oh shit, Oswald is bowing down on one knee to them. Oh their god. Oh wow. That’s… totally unexpected. 

“S-sir Oswald, I… don’t know what to say…” They really don’t, they’re super overwhelmed by the mixture of genuine, real emotion and the fact that they’re about to bust just standing here. “I-I p-promise to do my best…! Thank you for putting your trust in me!” Selby takes a bow themself, just at the hip, their hands folded at their waist. 

Oswald breaths a quiet sigh of relief. He didn’t know quite what was bothering Selby so bad since this morning, but whatever it is, this seems to have helped. He can at least rest easy knowing that. He stands again, saying, “No need to thank me until all of this is said and done, dear friend.” 

Selby goes back to their full height, too, their heart fluttering from all the praise, but their guard more or less down now, because of the oddness of the situation. “Well I think you’re, um… v-very worthy of thanks for doing all that you’ve done already, aha…!” That was a dumb thing to say. Stupid Selby. “A-anyway, I should, um… head to bed now… G-goodnight, sir…!”

“And a good night to you, too, Selby!” Without even thinking about it, Oswald gave their head a single pat, expecting to turn around and head to his tent right after. Unfortunately, when he tried to take a step away from his squire, he found a pair of hands holding his hand fast to their head, leaving him stuck. He turned to face them again and found his trembling courtier clasping his hand tightly. “Err…” 

“Please don’t stop…” Selby mutters under their breath, shaking as they hold Oswald’s hand to their head. “Please, I need it.” 

Oswald… pats their head again? He can’t raise his wrist at all, but he can, er… stroke their hair? As he does so, Selby makes a sound that can only be described as a purr. All Oswald can even think of in response to that is, “Ah…” Well, that was… interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Profile #4: The grumpy sellsword, Merc Courtier  
> Real Name: Lydia  
> Species: Hobgoblin  
> Age: 26  
> Height: 6’7”  
> Hair: Brown  
> Skin: Dark Yellow  
> Love: 2, Lust: 0, Power: 5, Charisma: 0, Intelligence: 3  
> Turn-ons: No.  
> Turn-offs: All.  
> Position: Shut the fuck up.  
> Ability - Self Controlled - Can help allies overcome any addiction, though the process may be painful.  
> “A wandering hobgoblin on a quest to recover from old wounds. Whatever she’s been through, it seems to have left her a bit irritable.”


	5. Headpats

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Selby gets what they've been wanting so, so badly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut Rating - 5/5, this one's all fuckin', babey!  
> Things should be getting a lot pornier from here for a few chapters ;D

Oswald was leaning back in his seat in the bed of the wagon. It was late at night and the campfire’d been put out, so dark he could barely see past his helmet’s visor, but his eyes still focused on something nonetheless. Selby the Squire Courtier, down on their knees on the floor in front of him, still looked slightly guilty about this, but also… eager. Very eager. 

After what had happened earlier that night, Selby had finally explained what had been on their mind all day. Apparently, there had been a rather ill-fated coincidence, and Oswald’s mode of reinforcing praise to his new friend had ended up being… one of their biggest fetishes. And after mentioning to Selby how he and Mara *usually* passed the time together earlier on, well… it seems the courtier’s mind had wandered something awful. 

“Th-this is r-really okay…?” Selby asked timidly. They’d been trying really hard to avoid this, they promise, but after that big gesture from before, their will just shattered. They broke down, begging him to keep touching them, and by the time they came to their senses, well… they had to tell him something… and they didn’t want to lie…

But they hadn’t expected him to suggest dealing with it like this!!! This was so embarrassing, and they were only in this situation because they couldn’t keep their head screwed on straight! It’s not that they… didn’t want to… Because they did. So badly. So, so, so badly. This was more or less a dream scenario, they’re not going to lie. If this really happens, they’ll be thinking about it during their late-night pawing sessions for years. But they still felt bad for just… dumping it all on Sir Oswald at once. Especially after he’d thanked them for being so brave… “I-I promise I can keep myself under control from now on, you shouldn’t need to force yourself to do anything.”

“Selby,” Oswald reassured, “This situation is more than okay, I assure you.” It’s true that the sudden admission that he’d been fulfilling their fantasies all day had taken him a bit off guard at first, but seeing Selby being open and honest with him, finally, had been more than enough to make up for it. He wanted them to be comfortable, first and foremost, and if something like this would help relieve some of their stress, then he’s very in favor of it.

Selby lets their eyes wander from Sir Oswald’s helmet down to his… belt… region. Then they look away nervously and stammer, “A-and it’s… okay that I’m still… It isn’t weird that I won’t, um… p-participate…?” And by that, they mean that they’re still fully clothed. They’d expressed a bit of nervousness at the idea of stripping, to which Oswald’s response was… very reassuring, but they were still anxious because they were always anxious hhhh-

“Selby,” Oswald says with a bit of humor, “If you hadn’t noticed, I myself am usually not one to strip wantonly.” It was true, he was a freak like that.

“B-but…” Selby’s eyes wander to the floor, out of half-and-half embarrassment and shame. “You do that for protection, not… not dumb gender reasons…” During the whole fetish conversation, they may have also let slip that they’re not entirely happy with the body they have… which was why they tried so hard to look and sound androgynous. Haha… oops… 

Oswald has the incredible urge to repeat the comforting gesture he’d been doing all day, but he holds off. For now. Instead, he says, “Those are not dumb reasons, Selby. You deserve all the comfort you’re able to give to yourself. I see your means of emotional protection no worse than my means of physical protection. You needn’t be harsh, dear friend.” 

...big, dumb, shiny, perfect, amazing Oswald. If he had any faults to him to speak of, Selby hadn’t found them yet. Well, other than obliviousness… After he finishes validating them, they look back up to… belt. They audibly gulp. This was… very new to them. 

“I only want for you what’s most comfortable,” Oswald offers. “Remember that you have the power for this to progress as far or end as soon as you’d like.” 

Selby nods softly. They don’t want this to end. Their heart is beating like crazy and their nerves are almost yanking them away all together, but Oswald’s voice is so comforting that… they feel emboldened just enough to keep going. 

They reach a hand up. Shakily, and slowly, but they do. Eventually, Selby finds their palm flush against the metal of Oswald’s grieves. They scoot forward just a bit, their breathing getting heavier. They work at the clasp holding chainmail to steel, eventually releasing the belt keeping Oswald’s pants fastened. They didn’t cartoonishly slip off, though, they were armor… so Selby calmly whispered, “Could you help with this part?” Strangely enough, the further along they got, the easier each next step was becoming. They were almost able to breath normally. 

Oswald hums an affirmation and uses a skilled hand to slip the steel leggings far enough for his nether-regions to become accessible. A truly difficult task for even the grandest of knights, maneuvering in half-worn armor, but in his time with Mara, Oswald had become an expert at it. 

After he was done wiggling his armor down far enough, Selby reached forward and… felt…… it. It was still soft, but it was unmistakable what it was. Still trembling, Selby slowly wrapped their soft fingers around it and brought it forward so that they could see it properly. Y-yeah… that sure was… Sir Oswald’s cock. God, it was so big, too. And they were going to get to… 

“h-Hahaha-, uh- um, a-are you, um, s-still s-sure about this…!?” Selby stammers, nervousness suddenly rising back into their features, both of their hands going to their reddened cheeks, their head turning away again. Everything else was one thing, but actually seeing and touching Sir Oswald’s penis was just… that was something else! “Aha… haha…!” 

Oswald, though, had planned for this inevitability. This is exactly why he held off on doing this for so long. With his gauntlet removed, he reaches out with his bare hand and cups Selby’s cheek, slowly moving his palm up their features and letting it rest on their scalp for a few moments before slowly running his fingers through their hair and whispering, “Selby, everything is okay.”

Selby just melts. The feeling of his hand against them was simply incredible, it completely washed away all of their anxieties. As if in a trance, they move themself forward, almost out from under Oswald’s hand entirely, as their lips connect with the tip of his cock. They bring the head into their mouth easily, lapping at it with their tongue once its inside. Oswald sighs lustfully as Selby starts giving him head for the first time, dearly appreciating the sensation of their warm tongue and soft lips against him. 

Selby feels a small twitch as Oswald begins to harden in their mouth, the member going from soft to deliciously hard against their tongue. They give a hum of approval as they taste him, the dull savoriness of penis a completely new flavor for them. They begin to wonder how on earth they’re actually doing this, how they could be so openly lewd, but then they feel his hand moving through their hair. Dear god, his fingers gripping their head, holding them gently in place while they suck him. When they feel him start to brush his palm back and forth, petting them from front to back, they start to wonder if they’re in heaven. They’re really here, getting headpats with a cock in their mouth. They don’t think they’ve ever been happier. 

Selby pushes their head forward even more, taking the first bits of Oswald’s shaft into their mouth. They keep at him with their tongue, licking at the rod’s sides and bottom. They let their hand travel back up to where it had been previously, softly gripping his now-hard dick, before starting to gently stroke. With their other hand, they reached down to their own crotch and simply rubbed the base of their palm up and down against their sensitive area. They still wouldn’t expose themself at all, but they couldn’t not touch themself when they were like this. Even the slight sensation of blunt pressure against their loin made them feel amazing, probably the best they’ve ever felt down there. 

Oswald continues to stare down at the scene, appreciating the sight of his new ally sucking and stroking him at once. Remembering that Selby’s dream scene also involved heavy praise, he whispers to them, “You feel amazing, Selby.” He’s not used to giving much verbal feedback, usually being quite stoic in his coital activities, but he’d make an exception for them. He feels them twitch around him at the first word. “Your mouth is incredible. You’re incredible.” Selby pushes their head down further, taking more of him into their hot, wet hole, feeling his moistened tip starting to prod at the back of their throat as he began giving off soft moans. “I’d offer you the world to keep feeling this with you~.” He moans again, louder, his deep voice echoing in Selby’s head as he strokes the back of it with his palm. 

They come back up for air. Selby’s breathing is hard as they take Oswald’s cock out of their mouth, trails of excess saliva leading from its tip to their lips, at least half of its length slick with Selby’s spit. Oswald’s at first worried they’ve hit their limit, but upon feeling them begin stroking his full length, with increased speed, that thought leaves his head rather fast. He lets his breathing stay heavy and lusty as he asks, “Something… wrong, friend?” 

Selby’s answer is to place the palm of the hand not rapidly pumping up and down his length onto his boot, curling their fingers around it and quietly cooing, “Can I hump this…?” 

Oswald’s fingers curl in Selby’s hair, making their eyelids visibly flutter. He finds himself hoping he can get used to scenes like this with his new close friend. To answer their request, he moves his foot to their crotch, pressing the toe of his boot into them. “Ahn~!” Selby moans sharply at the sensation, a sound followed by a low whine, “Hhhhhn, fuhhhg yes~.” They dive back down with their face, giving his cock one last, long, hard, full stroke with their tightly-closed fist before taking him back into their mouth. 

This time, instead of just pulling him in and sucking on as much as they can fit, they start actively pumping with their mouth. Selby continues to suck as hard as they can while bobbing their head up and down along his shaft and thrusting their hips forward into his boot. Oswald keeps petting their hair, humming and moaning at the intensifying blowjob. With both of their hands now free, Selby reaches up to massage Oswald’s groin with one palm while the other cups his balls and gives them soft squeezes, their small fingers pressing into his flesh delicately as their mouth works his cock in any way but. 

His moans get more intense. He usually holds back, but now that he’s started doing it, it’s easy to get really into it. His headpats slowly become a grasp on the back of Selby’s head, keeping their face held down onto his lap. Selby had absolutely no desire to speak, and was starting to stop caring about breathing, so they didn’t mind in the slightest. All they cared about at the moment was sucking the cock of the knight who kept saying things like, “Incredible,” and, “You’re fantastic, Selby,” to them, the knight who was letting them thrust their crotch against his boot, the knight who they really, really wanted to bottom for once they felt more comfortable getting naked. They only needed to bob their head a small bit with each suck, now, most of the cock well into their throat by this point. 

Rubbing their hair in circles, groaning appreciatively, Oswald says, “I’m beginning to get close to cumming.” He looks down at them, sees how hungry they are for his cock, how much they’ve drooled all over it, and feels a sharp pang of attachment. He feels like he hardly even needs to ask - with the way they’re slobbering all over him, spit running down their chin, they don’t look like they’ll mind either way - but Oswald always strives to be polite. He pushes the back of their head forward, forcing his whole length into their throat and making them cease their face’s thrusting. It sounds like they might be gagging on his length a tad, their lips sputtering around his taint, but he’ll make this quick, don’t worry. “One lick for your throat, two for your face~,” he hums with a low, affection-filled voice at the squire whose face is pressed flush against his groin. 

Selby is practically slamming their crotch into his boot as they trail their tongue against his shaft twice. It’s not that they don’t want it in their mouth, but the feeling of *appreciation* that accompanied cumming on someone’s face was unrivaled… so they’ve heard. They’ve only ever given or received over-the-clothes handjobs up until this point. But god, they wanted his cum to paint them so bad~.

He releases the back of their head long enough to clear up their airway, allowing them a few coughs and deep breaths (with his penis still firmly planted in their mouth), before he grabs their head again, this time with both hands, pumping his hips roughly against Selby’s face. Selby was squealing with lust around him, feeling him swell against their tongue, grinding against him until they felt ready to burst. They wouldn’t get to cum before he did, though. Before they could even properly react to him pounding their throat so roughly, he pulled back out, all the way this time, holding Selby’s hair firmly with one hand while gripping his shaft hard with the other. 

Selby’s loud noises of pleasure don’t stop once their mouth is free, though. As soon as there’s nothing blocking their throat, their sputtering whines and horny yips are plain to the ear. Hearing them only makes Oswald’s orgasm sweeter, though. He cums hard, ropes of white-hot jizz drenching Selby’s face in an instant. They keep their mouth open, hoping eagerly for some of it to splash against their extended tongue, and they aren’t disappointed. Oswald moans loud as he spunks across their face, painting their forehead, their lips, their cheeks, their tongue, and one of their eyes with cum. The entire time they’re being decorated with semen, they’re whining like a bitch in heat, which at the moment, they consider themself to be. Midway through Oswald’s rope-laying, Selby starts twitching uselessly as they feel a wet spot spread through their pants, their legs clamping down hard on either side of Oswald’s boot. 

Selby’s eyes shut tight with their orgasm, and only one can open again by the time Oswald was done, the other too splattered with semen to obey. With their outstretched tongue, they can taste the sharp, salty flavor already, thrilled that Oswald got at least one spurt in their mouth. They keep their recently-fucked hole open as they breath hard, coming down from their orgasm, watching Oswald come down from his. They both breathe heavy as they share each other’s heat.

While Selby’s mouth remains open, Oswald pushes his hips forward just a bit, so only the tip goes inside. Between hot, satisfied breaths, he asks, “Would you mind terribly cleaning this for me?” Selby’s squeaks with surprise by the re-entry of his head, but upon hearing his request, they see no other option than to happily hum a tired hum and start sucking again, this time softly, just until they lick up and swallow the last of his cum from the tip of his cock. As they do, Oswald’s hand lands at the top of their head again, and he whispers, “Good. That’s good~.” 

After another moment of head-giving, Selby pulls back, deciding their knight’s been sufficiently sucked clean. “Thank you… dear friend~,” Oswald breathes lustfully once its over. Selby reaches up and runs a palm against the eye that had been sprayed with jizz, attempting to wipe it clean. Once they’re able to see out of both eyes again, they bring their palm down in front of their face to examine it. Yeah… that was a lot of cum. They close their eyes and decide to lick their hand clean, too, relishing the flavor of Sir Oswald on the back of their tongue. 

Selby swallows, breathes in and out deeply, then looks up to Oswald. His chest was rising and falling slowly but deeply, his satisfaction clear despite the lack of expression available. Selby feels a sharp tug at their heart as they fully admit to themself that they have an enormous crush on this man. They didn’t know how common it was for him to go beyond friends-with-benefits and move into the realm of romance, but Selby wanted nothing more in this moment than to find out what it would take for that to happen.

They climb up off their knees, off the boot they just came all over, and onto his lap, letting themself straddle him. Wrapping their arms around his neck tightly, Selby leans into him and whispers, “Thank you… thank you so much… thank you for everything… thank you.” Despite being at the start of what may end up being a cataclysmic event in the realm’s history, Selby is, in this moment, the happiest they’ve ever been in their life. 

Oswald doesn’t know why he’s surprised at the affection, but he very much welcomes it. He wraps his arms around Selby, bringing them in close. In the process, he might, um… his dick is kinda… rubbing against their ass quite a bit. Wow, their ass was, um. Large. Soft. Round. They had a very nice ass, Oswald decides. Anyway, hugging, that was also great! “I hope that was everything you were hoping for,” he tells them. 

“Tha’ wis uhmazen…” Selby’s having problems speaking right now, their jaw sore, but they squeeze him harder. They were so happy. They wanted more of him so, so badly. They wish they could kiss him right now, but they won’t ask out of respect. They’ll both be comfortable stripping when they are. Selby wouldn’t force it from him, just like they knew he wouldn’t with them. “Thank you…” 

Oswald pets the back of their head some more. He wanted to get it out of his system while it was still appropriate. He’d have to really hold back to stop himself from doing that normally, ha… “Any time, friend~.” He’s so glad he was able to help. He’ll sleep easy knowing his ally is alright. Selby, on the other hand, will sleep easy no matter what, now. The memory of having their face decorated like a christmas tree with Oswald’s cum would make many, many nights very easy, they had a feeling~.

The two stayed in each other’s arms for a while before actually going to bed. It was a good thing that Oswald hadn’t made the time to set up the 2nd tent yet, because neither of them felt the need to separate. Selby fell asleep in Oswald’s arms, the wide smile on their face keeping him warm through the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Profile #5: The youthful disciple, Squire Courtier  
> Real Name: Selby  
> Species: Human  
> Age: 23  
> Height: 4’10”  
> Hair: Blonde   
> Skin: Pale  
> Position: Sub, Bottom  
> Love: 4, Lust: 3, Power: 0, Charisma: 2, Intelligence: 3  
> Turn-ons: Headpats, Blowjobs, Praise, Cuddling, Anal  
> Turn-offs: Scolding, Spanking, Being Top  
> Ability - Lemminghearted Liberation - Selby can rescue any princess from any tower without a knight’s help, but only once during the campaign.   
> “A young squire with an infatuation towards heroes. They hope to one day follow in the footsteps of the knight that once patted them on the head.”


	6. Bad Girls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ever wonder what the bad guys are up to when the heroes are away? Chantae talks to the Big Bad Wolf.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut Rating: 3/5? - half the chapter is just porn, the other half is at least suggestive, so ig three??? idk this system is totally arbitrary

Within the very council chambers that Oswald and Mara had been knighted just days prior, a scene unfolds unlike any that had taken place in the sacred halls before. There were no councillors, no politicians, no peacemakers, no knights. Instead, there was a heap of furry bodies in the center of the floor: the men, women, and others of the wolf kingdom’s army, all naked and writing against each other. Tongues were against cunts, knots were plugging asses, and there hardly existed a single wolf without cum coating their fur. The throne usually reserved for the High Chancellor is being occupied by a lone princess, the Big Bad Wolf herself, slowly running a diamond scepter against the fabric covering her crotch. She watches the orgy in front of her with a snaggle-toothed grin as she issues herself pleasure. She found herself more than satisfied with the scene already, before even getting to participate personally.

She watches as the guard who helped her trick those two knights was having his ass fucked and his cock sucked by the same wolf, a flexible man who’d given archery support in the initial attack. Her guard yelps into the air, filling his ally’s mouth with semen as he cums, drenching the archer’s tongue and snout with seed. The wolf next to him, a grunt getting their pussy eaten out by one of the airship pilots, giggles at the sight. The pilot wolf looks up as his playmate laughs, and decides to give them a little bit more to laugh about. He brings himself to his knees, prompting a confused look from the one he’s about to shove his entire, fat dick into with one thrust. The princess giggles to herself when she hears the soldier yelp as they’re pinned to the floor and rutted, the pilot’s thick knot already threatening to push into their tight hole. 

The greys and browns and reds and blondes and blues of the wolves’ fur all blend together before the princess’s eyes. The rounded tip of the shiny, new scepter she’d just found presses against her as she pushes it down further, making her whole one-piece feel tighter as it enters her slightly. The faintest hint of her fuzzy lips start showing around the edges of the fabric she’s trying to take in. She licks her chops as she watches her guard starting to make out with the giggly bitch from before, both of the soldiers moaning as their holes are reamed by their respective partners. She looks to the right and sees two lesbian wolves scissoring, a shared wetness slathering them both. She looks to the left and sees two different tongues servicing the same cock, a man and woman both masturbating while lapping at a plump soldier’s cock. She pushes the scepter in, still over her clothes, forcing her one-piece inside her cunt alongside it and giving anyone watching her from down below just the slightest show as she starts fucking herself.

Then the door opens. A single wolven woman steps into the chamber, one with dark blue fur with bright grey peaks. She wears an ornate suit, a fancy hat, and a collar the princess had custom-made, just for her. After closing the door behind her, she scans the room, her eyes more or less passing over the fuck puddle in an instant as she looks for the Big Bad Wolf. Her tail was wagging rapidly. 

“Up here, Kammy!” the wolf princess shouts, taking the shiny dildo out of her pussy and tossing it aside. She wanted to give *this* bitch her *full* attention! When Kammy hears her master’s voice, her ears perk up and her eyes dart to the source of the sound. As she rushes over to the throne, her tail’s wagging gets even faster. The closer she gets, the more obvious it is to her that the princess is soaking wet and partially exposed, which only serves to make her heart pound faster. She has the look on her face that a dog gets when it hears the word ‘walk’ and is ready to burst from excitement. 

Kammy reaches the princess’s side and bows deeply, saying, “Master Princess Master! All of the soldiers and politicians in town are secure in the dungeon, and every other citizen has been released to their homes, Master! Ma’am!” She talks even faster than her tail wags. “Am I a good girl!? Did I do good, mistress, did I!?” This woman, Kamilla, served two roles in life: being the general of the Endless Moonlight Kingdom’s army, and being Big Bad Wolf Princess’s personal slut. She absolutely adored both positions. 

BBWP reaches out with a big, warm paw and scritches Kammy behind the ear, cooing, “Yeeeeah, you’re *such* a good girl~!” Then she applies force to Kammy’s scalp, forcing her to her knees and making the girl eep. “And you know where good girls belong~?”

“Between master’s thighs~?” Kammy answers from memory.

“Yeeeeaaaah~!” The princess juts her hips out from her seat a bit, giving Kammy all the room she needs to get to work on her second shift for today. “Such a good girl, aren’t you?”

“I’m a good girl,” Kammy whines as gets about the task of exposing her Master. She wasn’t allowed to use her hands to do it, and her teeth were off limits until she mastered the snout strat, so she was forced to struggle with pressing her nose into the side of the princess’s pussy until it was freed of fabric. Once the royal’s sex was out in the open, Kammy whimpered at how wet it looked already. It was clear that *something* had been touching her majesty while Kammy was away, and she was visibly distressed at the notion that she’d missed out on something. 

“Just a warmup, Bitch,” the princess assures, seeing the general’s expression. “Don’t get your hen in a twist, alright~? Now be a good girl.” 

Kammy whispers “...good girl…” to herself as she pressed her face forward, absolutely burying it in the larger woman’s pussy. She partially penetrates the princess’s cunt with her blunt snout, breathing in the scent of her sex deeply as she extends her tongue and laps at the soaked, pink slit. Giving off a few more obedient, submissive whines, she feels a tent forming in her pants as the hen in question strains to receive the same pleasure Kammy was currently giving out. Good girls didn’t touch without asking permission, though, and good girls *never* pulled away from oral to speak unless Master yanked on their hair first. And Kammy was such a good girl. Her tail is going so fast now that its making whooshing noises. 

The princess leans back in her throne as her Bitch eats her out. “Good giiiiirl~,” she coos, sliding her paw over Kammy’s head, eliciting more pathetic whines from the whore in heat. While she feels the wide, flat tongue gliding across her folds, the princess looks back out over the orgy again. Her guard was fucking the giggly grunt’s ass now, pulling their hair as he did, making them bark sharply with pleasure. They both looked to be in total ecstasy as a third wolf, standing over them, came all over the pair’s faces, ejaculating from his own hand. The princess’s guard opens his mouth to try and catch the load on his tongue while the grunt he’s fucking just takes it all over their face, cum mixing with fur as they feel their asshole stretch around the knot being forced in. 

Her breathing getting heavier now, the princess says, “I think my Bitch should fuck me.” Kammy leaps to her feet in an instant, her tongue still hanging out of her pussy-soaked mouth as she pries her pants off and lets her girldick flop out into the open, precum already drizzling from the tip. The princess spreads her legs and Kammy practically dives into her, tackling her body against the princess’s as she thrusts her hips forward with wild abandon, fucking her Master eagerly and skillfully. 

As she feels herself being penetrated over and over again, practically splashing as she’s fucked, the princess whispers, “Good girl,” into the general’s ear. Kammy howls, loud and lustful, as she feels the love of her life’s wet cunt clamp down around her thick shaft. The guard down on the floor howls, too, responding to the general as he pulls out of his partner’s ass to spray his next load all over their back. Then they howl, too. Girls stop making out, boys stop sucking cock, everyone in the room howls, a wild cheer for their victory and well-earned rewards. The princess is last, howling happily as her girlfriend reams her tight pussy, her heart filled with pride for everyone in the room. 

\- - -

Hours later, once the orgy had calmed, both the princess and her general are fully dressed as they enter the city dungeons. As fully dressed as a woman who wears nothing but a swimsuit can be, anyway. At least Kamilla was outfitted appropriately. 

The wolves guarding the door salute the duo as they pass, the two most important people within the nearest 50 kingdoms immediately recognizable. “Everyone here either fought back or owned multiple weapons in their homes,” Kammy was telling the princess. Her voice is professional and stern now, nothing like the pussy-addict whore she was being at the orgy. “Some seemed ready to subject to our rule off the bat, but I would recommend not negotiating with any kingdom-affiliated knights or knight-lackeys until we’ve heard word from your sisters of total domination.” 

The princess, still wobbling on her feet from the utter pounding the girl next to her had just given, says, “Yeah yeah, okay. They couldn’t stop us even if they tried, but I guess…” 

“I’m serious, your majesty,” Kammy says in a low growl. She was so deep into professional mode, she wasn’t even using her girlfriend’s name. The princess would be intimidated if she wasn’t a foot and a half taller than the general. “We can’t underestimate the enemy. Giving them even an inch to work with could result in us losing *everything* we’ve gained.” 

The princess just rolls her eyes. This was by far her least favorite part of the job. She wanted to spend her days being worshipped and getting fucked, just like every other princess got to do. This whole war thing was tiring. “I thought the plan was for them to not *be* our enemies. S’not like we killed anyone, what are they even gonna have to complain about?” If she could help it, she’d really like it if the people who were to be her subjects weren’t living in constant fear of her. People living in fear were way less likely to come to the orgies she invites them to!

“Well whether you like it or not, some people can’t be swayed.” As they start to pass by the first of the cells containing their political prisoners, Kammy looks to the side and sees… *her.* “For example…” she growls. 

The princess follows her girlfriend’s glare and sees a white-haired human woman bound to the wall by about a dozen different chains. “Evening, Kamilla~,” Chantae coos to the general, batting her eyelashes at the wolves. She’d wave, but she’s a bit tied up at the moment. “I’d love~ to beg to differ. I’d be simply pleased as punch if you’d let me join your little party~.”

Before the princess can even say anything, because Kammy knows she’s about to, the general explains, “*This* little tart is an ex-general, formerly employed by the Evil Princess. You know, one of the reasons we’re even doing this campaign in the first place?”

Ah. BBWP understands, she no longer feels the urge to comment on how big this piece of shit’s titties are. “Oh come *on~* Kamilla!” Chantae says with a rosy smile, trying to win over the new princess, “I’m reformed! I have utterly no desire to help those mean, old nasties at the Evil Kingdom~! Really, I’m a changed woman~!”

Kammy sneers. “Every word that comes out of this skank’s mouth is a lie, and trying to get her on your good side is only going to end up with a knife in your back.” 

Everything she says is lies, huh? “By the way, you’re looking *gorgeous* today, Kam~.” Kammy just growls, her snout vibrating with malice at the seducer. Then, with a bit more of a sting than a lilt, Chantae adds, “And if I was stabbing you in the back all that time we spent together, you sure didn’t seem to mind.”

Before Kammy can outright explode at the prisoner for egging her on, the princess gives her a pat on the head, saying, “I’m not gonna let her out, babe, don’t worry.”

“B-babe?” Once Chantae processes the meaning of the word, “OH MY GOD IS SHE YOUR GIRLFRIEND~?” 

“Let’s move on,” Kammy growls.

“You’re dating a princess!? You have to tell me about it, pleeease~?” Despite the courtier’s pleas, Kamilla takes her majesty’s hand and leads her away, further down the corridor. “Boo~!” Chantae says with a pout, giving off a dramatic huff, shaking the chains that bind her in the process. As the pair walk away, though, Chantae actually notices a bit of a… hm, interesting detail about the princess~.

“So you two know each other?” the princess asks casually, sparing Kammy a glance as she’s led down the hall. 

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Kammy states plainly, ready to just get this over with. “Let’s start with the house husbands who collected swords, they should be more than eager to bow to your-”

“Hey princess~!” Chantae interrupts, leaning seductively against her prison bars, pressing herself against them and making her fat tits squish forward, almost spilling past the cell. “You have some of Kam’s cum dripping down your leg~!”

Kammy snaps her head around. “How did you get unchained!?” she demands, stomping back over to the cell with her paws baring their sharp claws for attack. 

“Magic~!” Chantae whispers, doing jazz hands for emphasis. “Oooo~! I can make my panties disappear, too, wanna see~?”

The princess reaches down to her inner thigh and feels that there is indeed some leakage going on. After licking the jizz off her paw-bean, though, she just… presses her legs together, feeling the warmth inside of her. Hehe. Meanwhile, Kammy shouts, “Guards! Get in there and tie that bitch down right this time!” 

“Oh, yes~, treat me ROUGH~!” Chantae moans in response, pushing herself against the bars until her nipples are hard, rubbing her hand along the fold in her crotch for bonus seduction. 

“Oh, and bring a winter coat to cover her up with,” Kammy adds, eliciting a deep frown out of Chantae. Glancing over at her girlfriend, Kammy also adds, “And, uh… maybe a towel? For her majesty?” 

“Nah, I’m good~!” the princess calls out.

“Come the fuck on, Kam,” Chantae says quietly, dropping the sexy voice for the woman who knows better. “You know your side is better off with me on it. Don’t be stupid.” 

Kamilla looks Chantae in her beady little eyes and says, “Yeah. We’d probably be much better off.” Then she smiles, her sharp teeth glittering in the torchlight of the dungeon. “And I don’t care.” The guards she requested show up, one holding up the ugliest looking snow jacket that Chantae has ever seen. It doesn’t even match her outfit, ugh! “Make sure she stays put. Assign an extra guard if you need to, just don’t listen to her horsehit, got it?”

As the guards bow to their general, yes ma’aming her and opening Chantae’s cage to tie her down tighter, the seducer scowls at Kamilla. So much for that plan. 

\- - -

After she watches Kamilla and *her majesty* leave the dungeon with a gaggle of freed captives in tow, Chantae slumps against the wall she’s been chained to again. What a bunch of no-fun prudes. All they’re doing is having parties all day and poking at princesses, Chantae wants in on it, dammit! She’s the *best* ally to have, what in the fuck is Kamilla on about!? The wolf *certainly* didn’t seem to mind having Chante on her side when she was getting her dick sucked by the seducer for *three years*. 

Well whatever. She’ll show her. Kamilla will be *begging* Chantae to join the wolf team by the time the seducer’s done. She takes the key she stole from the personal guard she just knocked out, unlocking the last of the cuffs she had locking her in place. Then, mercifully, she rips off that horrid coat Kamilla forced on her. Who in their right mind would wear all that, they must be insane. As she makes her way to the cell door, Chantae remember’s Kamilla’s bitchy little, ‘Make sure she stays put.’ Yeah whatever Kam, get better guards. Dipshit. 

Chantae didn’t even need a key to slip out of the bars, her plain old magic powers will work those just fine~. She *has* a key, and no one is even around to watch her show off, but fuck it, you know? The only reason she was even still down here in the first place was so that she could talk to Kamilla, but if her ex is giving her the cold shoulder like that, getting her whore dick wet with royalty instead, Chantae doesn’t even mind. She doesn’t even care about Kamilla anymore. Fuck Kamilla. She doesn’t care. She does not care. 

She lets her whip sway back and forth as she steps down the hall of cells, not caring that her heels clack on the stone along the way. If more guards wanna come fight, let them. She’s pissed off, she could probably use the distracion, to be honest.

From what she overhead while the royal and the bitch were still down here interrogating people, the only people let go just now were all the local guards and the family men; all of the independent knights were still holed up with her. And what was a courtier without a knight, hm~? She stops in front of a cell with an armored figure still inside. “Hey big boy~,” she coos to the knight. “Wanna help a girl out~?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Profile #6: The ‘ex’ villainess, Seducer Courtier   
> Real Name: Chantae  
> Species: Human  
> Age: Don’t you know it’s rude to ask a lady her age~?  
> Height: 5’5”  
> Hair: White  
> Skin: Pale  
> Position: Dom, Vers (Prefers Bottom)   
> Love: 1, Lust: 4, Power: 2, Charisma: 5, Intelligence: 3  
> Turn-ons: Naughty Boys & Girls, Bondage, Open Flirtiness, Whipping, Latex  
> Turn-offs: Prudes, Soft Stuff, Chains  
> Ability - Enchantress, Seductress, Same Diff - Chantae can make anything made of cloth or leather vanish, making them totally invisible. Perfect for clothes~. And for weapons.   
> “Once the right-hand gal to the Evil Princess, she’s apparently gone clean, though her mannerisms tell you otherwise.”


	7. Sheep Out of Sheep's Clothing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mara pisses off Lydia, then pisses on... well, you'll see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh yeah this chapter is where I be self-indulgent and do piss stuff, sorryyyy~! It has no plot relevance, just a one-shot smut-focused chapter that I made for me because I deserve it, so if you're incredibly turned off by watersports, feel free to skip this one! Next chapter (and many more after) will be as pissless as possible, I promise. 
> 
> Unless people really want more hohohoho~!
> 
> Smut Rating - 4/5, it's most of the chapter, just not all

Mara woke up feeling sore and cranky. She just slept on the floor. God. Last night was terrible, everything felt like shit now. Not only that, but she feels like she seriously missed out on something without having any idea why. Ugh, whatever. Time to get ready, she guesses. She sits up, attempting to shake the stiffness out of her shoulders with a few stretches, her muscles and joints screaming at her to not move so fast as she yawns and opens her bleary, tired eyes. Day 2 out on the road was off to a great start. 

She crawls out of her tent expecting to find a campsite she was gonna have to help clean up, but when the morning sunlight (gross) hits her face, she realizes everything was already packed up. “Bwah...?” Confused, she looks around frantically, only to find Lydia already in the front seat of the wagon, everything but Mara’s tent already packed up. 

Lydia turns her head to see the sleepy Mara blinking rapidly in an attempt to understand what had happened. “About fucking time,” the hobgoblin spat out, getting the elf’s attention. “I’ve been waiting here for 40 minutes.” 

“Buh…?” Mara was still half-asleep, she doesn’t get what’s happening. “But that’s so early… Why didn’t you wake me up?”

“I tried.” Lydia didn’t sound amused. “Hurry up and get your tent in the wagon, we need to get going.” 

“Already!?” Mara slowly got up to her feet, looking down at the tent that she did *not* want to disassemble right now. “Can’t we wait just a little bit?” she whined, “I’m still so tired, need time to-” 

“You can rest in the wagon,” Lydia says. “Sleep until we get to the tower for all I care, just move your ass so we can get going!” The woman was no-nonsense, and didn’t want to waste another second that they could be using to fix the mess that Mara had gotten them into in the first place. “Well? Are you gonna stand around there looking dizzy all day or are you gonna move?” 

Mara blinked slowly. She was really hoping they’d be getting along better after her apology yesterday. Weh. “Can I, like… go to the bathroom first, at least?” she mumbles, punctuating her words with a long yawn. “Unless you want me peeing in the wagon, which is like… jeez Lydia, why are you so interested in-”

“Shut up.” Lydia gets out of the wagon to get the tent put away herself, since Mara seemed useless without a cock to keep her busy. “Just hurry the fuck up and do it far away from me, got it?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Mara says with another yawn, turning towards the forest behind her. “I’ll make sure you’re immune to splash damage.” 

“I mean it, *far* away,” Lydia repeats. “Just be back here in ten minutes, we’ve lost enough time as it is.” 

“Mhm.” That was fine with Mara, she didn’t wanna be near Lydia any more than Lydia wanted her to be near Lydia. 10 minutes, though, that was… probably enough time to masturbate, right? That’s fine. Mara just needs to bumble into the forest until the campsite is out of sight and earshot. No one wants to offend Lydia’s delicate sensibilities with anymore of her primary bodily functions. Stupid fucking prude. 

...why is she thinking like this, what is the matter with her?

Mara shakes her head to try and make herself more awake. You know, like maybe she’ll act like less of a bitch once she has all of her senses about her. Unfortunately, shaking just makes her dizzy. After almost falling over a few times, she’s fairly certain that if she tries to get too much farther away from the carriage than she was now, she’d get lost. So she decides that the tree she nearly just faceplanted into was a good enough spot as any. She leans her back against the bark, sighing. How long of a walk was that? A minute? She *should* be able to rub one out before her time was up. 

She should probably get her actual business out of the way first, though. She lifts her dress up and spreads her legs, not needing to worry about underwear because she didn’t have any! What fun. She pushes down on herself slightly, just to make sure the stream was angled away towards a bush and wouldn’t drip down her legs and stain her socks, or whatever. 

She let her mind wander away from how mean Lydia was and over to what Oswald and Selby were up to right now. She wanted to think of something nice before she tried to get herself off, so she thought about… what if Oswald, like… got his dick out? 

God, she’s so tired that she can’t even fantasize right. She sighs and lets her bladder loose, sending a stream of piss into the bush in front of her and hoping it wouldn’t smell weird because of the… eugh… wood horse that she ate last night. Unfortunately, Mara was a bit too dizzy to even notice the rustling from beneath her wasn’t just because of pee. When she started to spray, someone else started to move, disturbed from their sleep by the sudden warm, wet feeling enveloping them.

A head pops out of the bush, just as bleary-eyed as Mara would be if Mara’s eyes were even still open. The face was that of a certain faun, half girl and half sheep, with white wooly hair and curved brown horns. Also, with piss on her face, because as she rose, she accidentally put her face right in the stream’s path. As the dusk elf pees against the faun’s forehead, and as the faun feels the hot, wet liquid drip down to her face and neck, she realizes that… wait a minute… she never asked for a stranger to piss on her. She doesn’t even like getting pissed on by people she likes! She knows, she’s tried it before!

Deciding that having her face peed on isn’t for her, only after some of it drips into her mouth, mind you, she leans back so that it won’t hit her face anymore, sticking out her tongue and trying to spit the stinging, salty liquid in her mouth back out. Leaning back just means it doesn’t hit her in the face, though, so now Mara’s simply pissing all over her chest, soaking her top and the tits underneath. As the faun feels warmth seep into her cleavage, even getting as far as dripping down to her stomach and thighs, she finally has a chance to look up at who’s doing this. She has no idea who this is… She’s cute and all, but why is she peeing on her? Was this, like, a prank, or something? 

Mara’s eyes are still closed as her stream starts to weaken, the arc falling short of the woman’s chest and trailing across her midriff and the crotch of her overalls as it dissipates, causing even more wet spots than there were already, from when the faun was laying down. Mara was more than prepared to sink to her knees, wipe off with a leaf, and then go to town on herself while thinking about what Selby looks like under all those clothes, but that plan was interrupted by a soft, quiet voice asking, “Can I ask who you are?” 

“Huh?” Did she just hear a voice? Mara opens her eyes and- “WAH!!!” She gets so startled a little bit more comes out, hitting the faun’s cheek, making her flinch to the side a bit. “WHO!? UH!? WHERE!? WHO ARE!?”

The faun blinks a few times as Mara sputters, then looks down at the now-piss-soaked clothes she was wearing. Warm, sure, but not exactly comfortable… “Why did I get peed on…?” she asks. “I’m not mad or anything, just curious.” She sniffs. “It smells weird…” Oh no, that was the thing Mara was self-conscious about!!!!!!!!

Mara, horrified, manages to get out, “I-I’m so sorry! I-I didn’t see anyone and- and I was tired-!” She’s not tired anymore, this little encounter shocked her awake. “I’m so, so, so sorry, are you alright, oh no, holy- ah fuck!” Mara goes from half-awake to completely panicked in less than a second, that had to be a new record. 

Oh! Oh, this must have been an accident, the faun realizes. Well that was okay, then. “I’m alright~!” she says cheerily, hoping to assuage Mara’s fears even as the elf’s pee continues to drip off her chin. “As long as it was an accident, I don’t mind~! I might need to wash my clothes, though.” There wasn’t a might about it, the only thing not covered in pee was her own underwear… ironically enough. The strange elf lady still seems to be panicking, though, so she offers, “Oh, would it make you feel better if I peed on myself, too?” She does kinda need to go… 

“PLEASE DON’T DO THAT!” Mara finally responds, waving her hands wildly to get the girl to stop. Please, *please* don’t give her another thing to have to feel sorry for!

\- - -

Lydia looked down at Mara like a parent looks down at a misbehaving child. Not mad, just disappointed… except she was also mad. She was mad *and* disappointed. The sheep girl, Barbie, was sitting in the back of the wagon, naked except for her pure white panties and Mara’s big, blue mage’s robe, which hung around her figure about as loosely as a sheet. Mara, just in her dress, was looking down at her feet with her arms folded behind her back, avoiding eye contact with the hobgoblin out of shame. 

“L-listen, if she said she didn’t mind-” Mara starts in an attempt to defend herself, but swiftly gets cut off.

“You know why she said that,” Lydia states, referring to the fact that the woman Mara just relieved herself all over had later introduced herself as an Arcana Bearer, a person with spiritual significance rivaling that of the princesses themselves. If Barbie’s soul hadn’t been irreversibly tied to the very concept of temperance itself, she’d have been furious, just like anyone else. “You still have to make it up to her and to me if you want back on this wagon.”

“You?” Mara asks incredulously, looking back up at Lydia’s face finally. “What did I do to *you* that I have to apologize for!?”

“*I’m* the one who has to go find a river so I can get her piss-soaked outfit cleaned!” Lydia answers with hostility. “God knows *you* can’t be trusted to do it! You can’t even go to the bathroom right!”

“I didn’t see anyone!” Mara whines, stamping her foot down. “How was I supposed to know someone could be in there? Who sleeps in a bush out in the middle of the woods!?”

“That’s me~!” Barbie offers, waving from her seat, Mara’s robe fluttering around her and offering a view of her nearly nude form. The warmth of Barbie’s tone makes Mara bow her head in shame again, cheeks hot. 

“A person whose stated purpose in the universe is moderation! *That’s* who sleeps in a bush, you ignorant dolt,” Lydia tells Mara. “I don’t see the problem with you taking responsibility for your actions, *lady knight*. I was under the assumption that’s what we were out here for in the first place!”

“Okay, okay, you don’t need to yell,” Mara said dejectedly. “I owe you *two* now, okay? Happy?” 

“Here?” Lydia asked incredulously, “Around you? Perish the thought.” That one stung. Mara’s been knew she was kind of useless, but… has she always been *this* hateable? Around Oswald and Smuhg, she’d never had this many terrible problems so close together… She was starting to wonder if she was just having bad luck, or if it really was just her fault everything bad happened… “Now, if you’ll excuse me,” Lydia said, lifting a sack of dirty clothes over her shoulder, “I have someone’s *mess* to clean.” She turns away from Mara and heads off into the woods to find a river or lake. Neutral territory needed to be accessible to aquatic kingdoms, so it shouldn’t take long, at least.

Mara pouts for a few more seconds, then sighs and climbs up into the wagon. Guess she needs to… make it up to Barbie, now… “Hello~!” the lamb girl coos as Mara joins her in the carriage bed. “Your name’s Mary, right~?”

“M-Mara…” 

“Riiiight, sorry~!” She knocks on her own forehead, making the robe flutter around her body again, almost enough to show off some nip. Mara can more or less tell what she looks like naked, though, even with the partial coverings. From the hip-down, she was all sheep, with soft wool covering her crotch, ass, and legs, legs which in little, well-manicured hooves. She even had a fluffy little tail, and everything. Her torso, on the other hand, that was all human. Her arms, supple stomach, and gigantic tits were all free of fur, and seemed to Mara to be very warm and inviting. Every part of her looked round and soft, it was hard *not* imagining what she’d feel like to touch… though Mara was still doing her best, out of respect and remorse. “It’s really great to meet you, Mara~!” 

“I-is it…?” Mara asks sadly. They met by Mara drenching her in piss, that couldn’t have been pleasant in the slightest. 

“Of course it is~!” Barbie cheers regardless. “I love meeting new people~!” Everything she said sounded so happy, how did she manage it…? “Especially people who are so nice, teehee~.”

“Is that what I’ve been…?” Unless she was talking about Lydia, which… She wasn’t talking about Lydia, no one could ever call Lydia nice… 

“You gave me your cloak when I needed it!” Barbie responds right away, leaning forward in her seat. “And you’re giving me a place to rest for a while~! And you’re not attacking me with sticks and nuts like the squirrels do, haha!”

“Why would the squirrels attack you!?”

“I think I stepped on one of their tails once, on accident… and then word got around to the rest of the squirrels, so… you know how it is.” Does she…? Mara had no idea squirrels were so vindictive. “But if the critters can’t forgive me, I can at least forgive other people, you know~?”

“Y-yeah, I guess…” Mara averts eye contact. Does she even deserve to be forgiven? “I, um… I promise not to attack you with sticks and nuts, at least…?” 

“Teehee, thanks~!” Barbie leans back again, looking utterly at peace with her surroundings. “I mean it, though. Your friend said you had to make it up to me, but I really don’t mind.” Mara’s brow furrowed at those words. “You already made it up to me by offering to help. I think that’s enough~!”

Mara sat there in silence for a moment, looking a lot smaller than normal without her robe. Her bare shoulders shake in the morning cold, her dress doing little to keep her warm or comfortable. “I…” Her nails dug into her knees. 

“Hey, I promise,” Barbie says softly, seeing Mara’s continued anxieties. “I know you feel bad about it, but you don’t need to beat yourself up. I’m okay, you don’t need to feel bad!” 

Okay, Mara didn’t *need* to feel bad, but she still *did* feel bad. Even if Barbie forgave her, maybe Mara didn’t forgive herself? For caring so little about other people that she ends up doing something like this? Ugggghhhh, she hates how bad this is affecting her, it clearly didn’t need to, but it was anyway! Fuck! “Are you… *sure*?” she mumbles, looking up at Barbie again. “Isn’t there *something* more I could do, just… anything?” 

Barbie blinks. She *thinks* she knows what’s going on here, so she smiles and softly asks, “Would doing me a favor make you feel better, then?” When Mara nods, her puppy-elf eyes glimmering pathetically, Barbie giggles into her hand. “Well, okay~! If you really wanna make it up to me, I think there’s something you’d be perfect to help with~!” She doesn’t wanna give a *mean* task, or anything, especially since she’s not even a bit mad at Mara, so she simply spreads her legs, putting the crease in her panties on display for the elf. “Could you come here for a minute~?”

Mara stares for a moment before her brain catches up. At first she thinks that Barbie’s underwear also got dirty, somehow? That Mara needs to clean them? But then she stops being an idiot and goes, “Oh! O-oh, uh, yeah! Okay, f-for sure!” That certainly was a favor that Mara would be excellent at fulfilling! She walks over to where Barbie sits, getting on her knees and asking, “You mean like… like this, right?” 

“Mhm~!” Barbie reaches down and moves her panties to the side, exposing the wet slit amidst the soft fur of her lower half. The fluffy wool combined with Barbie’s chubbiness made her pussy look unbelievably soft. She was already wet, too, so she’d probably been ready to ask about sex even without considering Mara’s guilt… “Go ahead and dig in, okay~?”

Mara didn’t need to be asked twice. She puts her hands on either side of Barbie’s hips, bringing her mouth and Barbie’s crotch together, nuzzling her face into the soft fur of the faun. As Barbie giggles, Mara sticks her tongue out and begins to lick, running her wet muscle across the folds presented to her. It only serves to make Barbie giggle more, the lamb sounding like she was getting tickled rather than pleasured. 

Mara grabs down hard on the ample, wooly flesh of Barbie’s ass, feeling the absolutely pillow-like quality of her body. “Mhmhmhm~, you like feeling me there~?” Barbie asks cutely, wiggling her lower half even as Mara eats her out. “Touch it as much as you want, okay~?” Mara *definitely* didn’t need to be asked twice there. She happily gropes Barbie, letting her hands travel farther back than just the sides, taking big handfuls of the sheep’s ample ass as she picks up the pace with her mouth. She finds the clit after poking around for it with her tongue, and focuses her attention there, suckling it lightly, finally forcing a reaction out of the arcana. “Aah~! Ahaha, hm-mmmm~,” Barbie moans, “I like that a lot~, heehee~.” 

Mara keeps sucking at her fuzzy nub, turning the sheep’s continued giggles into bubbly groans of fulfillment. Mara brings one hand back from Barbie’s ass and presses it against the faun’s soft, warm folds. After rubbing around the slit with her fingers for a few seconds, feeling how wet Barbie was getting, she lets two digits slip inside, making Barbie give off a sharp, “Eep~!” and a, “Oooh~ hehehe~, I like that~.” Mara finger fucks the lamb gently, feeling her tight walls clamp down eagerly on her hand, sucking on her clit even harder now. Barbie starts moaning more and more, clearly enjoying the treatment. Her hips start to push forward, her hands grasping at the wall of the wagon for support. Once her arms are behind her, her tits start to poke out of Mara’s robe, nipples already hard with arousal. 

“You’re… mmmm~ aha~, you’re reeeaally good at this~,” Barbie coos, her hips starting to gyrate on their own. Mara puts another finger inside, using her mouth to alternate between licking and sucking Barbie’s soft nub. “Mmmmmmmmm~.” Barbie doesn’t seem able to stay particularly quiet during sex, does she? “Mmm-Hmmm~! Mmm, yeah~. Ohhh, I’m gonna start cumming~.”

Mara only takes that as a sign to go harder. She hooks the fingers massaging Barbie’s slick core up, pressing them right into the lamb’s sweet spot, making her squeak, “Aaaaahhh!” Mara’s other hand keeps up with groping at the faun’s fat ass, digging her nails in and shaking it up and down. “Aaaa, ah! Yyyye, mm~!” Her tongue gets faster and rougher, pressing firmly into Barbie’s now spit-soaked clit with her eager tongue. “Mmmmmmm-AH! Cumming~! Cumming cumming cumming cumming~!” 

As Barbie cutely chants her arousal, she bucks hard against Mara’s face, hard enough to knock any lesser slut straight to the floor. Mara was a Grand Slut, though, so she kept going just as hard as before, just using the force against her to press more deeply into the pussy, more harshly against the clit. After several seconds of Barbie screaming, “Cumming!!! Cumming, cumming!” over and over, several seconds of her pussy trying to squeeze Mara’s fingers off, the sheep falls back down onto the bench with a heavy thud, breathing heavily. Her chest heaves with her breathing, her breasts proudly visible. “Fu-fuh… Fuck~. Mmmmm~.”

Mara’s pace slows steadily, not all at once once she knows her partner’s orgasm ended. She keeps pumping her hand into Barbie softly, giving the clit gentle kisses and appreciative licks, for around a minute before finally stopping, Barbie cooing with satisfaction the whole time. “Ahhh, amazing~,” Barbie says once Mara finally pulls away, replacing the elf’s pussy-slick face with her own hand, pressing down with her palm against her practically dripping folds. “That was one of the best blowjobs ever~.” 

“Yeah…” Mara agreed, still… sounding a bit sad. “That was a lot of fun, huh?” Maybe… a bit too fun. Mara wanted something to make it up to Barbie, but that didn’t feel like she was doing work, she was just doing what she normally does when she meets thickly built women. That was like saying Mara had to breathe for a whole day to pay for her crimes, like, it was no effort. 

Still rubbing her tingling vagina, Barbie looks down at Mara and asks, “Is something wrong?” That was pretty good for her, more than a favor in Barbie’s opinion. 

“Meeeeeh,” Mara whines, visibly drooping. “I don’t know! I should be fine now, I have no idea what’s the matter with me!” Her forehead thunks against Barbie’s crotch, and Barbie turns her post-orgasm rubbing into a headpat for the dusk elf. There there. “I just… I dunno, I feel like I still need to do more. Like, I did something bad, but all I had to do for it was look at a pretty girl naked and then get her cum on my face, those are all good things! Nyeeeeh!” She feels like she’s whining for no reason and probably just making things worse, at this point. 

Barbie, though, font of patience that she is, doesn’t mind at all, continuing to smooth over Mara’s hair as she asks, “So you want punished, is what you’re saying~?”

. . .was that what she was saying? Is Mara, like, more into S&M than she thought she was…? No, it didn’t feel like a kink thing, but still… “I mean… kinda? I guess?” 

“I have an idea for that, too, if you’re really desperate,” Barbie says with a smirk. Mara’s… not sure she likes the sound of that, but should she? Punishment doesn’t sound like something she should enjoy. So she nods her head nervously, making Barbie giggle and say, “Okay~, if you insist~!” She gets to her hooves and offers a hand to help Mara up, too. “Could you take your clothes off for me, first?” 

Mara hesitates, because something that involves her naked sure doesn’t *sound* like a punishment, but she still says, “Yeah, okay?” and starts to undress anyway. She kicks off her shoes and socks, then unbuttons her dress before pulling it up over her head. That was it. Most of her clothes were already gone. :,) Her entire body is in the open air now, her small tits with their nipples hardening at the breeze, her smooth, slim waist, and her pussy that was starting to need a shave, after a couple days out here. 

“No undies?” Barbie asks curiously, running her hand along Mara’s waist appreciatively.

“Oh, uh…” Mara mumbles, feeling her sides tingle as Barbie felt her up. “I mean, small boobs, don’t really need a bra, and um… I kinda… lost? My panties? Haha…” 

Barbie smiles, finding that utterly charming~, as she takes Mara by the hand and says, “This way, please~!” Mara follows, being led off the wagon and onto the forest floor. She feels the mud and grass on her soles and finds the small, traditional-elf part of her feel comforted. “Could you lay down~?” Barbie asks, pulling Mara’s robe off her shoulders and stowing it on the wagon. Uncovered by the mage’s cloak, Mara actually pays attention to Barbie’s boobs now, and holy fuck. The tits had to be E-cup at least, probably more, with large nipples standing on end in the cold air. Looking at a rack like that, Mara is simply unable to argue, and sinks down to the floor, laying on her back and looking up at Barbie as the faun slides her panties off, too. What was she…? 

“Okay,” Barbie says mischievously. “If you really don’t want to owe me anything, absolutely nothing at all, the only way to do that is for the same thing to happen to you, right~?” Oh… Oh No. Mara felt her heart sink and skip at the same time. She absolutely dreaded the prospect of having that happen, but also found herself getting just a bit excited at the idea of being punished… you know, humiliated and whatnot… maybe she was more into S&M than she thought… “Is that okay with you~?” Barbie asks, ensuring consent before she makes another move. 

Mara sighs, shame and embarrassment burning her cheeks, but says, “Yeah… that’d be fair…” She prays to the forest spirits that Lydia takes a really, really long time to wash those clothes. She didn’t want anyone to see her getting a golden shower… 

Barbie smiles and then leans against the wagon, keeping her legs spread, the same position Mara had been in earlier. Only now the roles were reversed, and at least one of them seemed to be getting something out of it~. “Are you sure this is a punishment~?” Barbie asks tauntingly, “You seem kinda wet already~.”

“I-I was just eating pussy!” Mara stammers, looking about as innocent as a man in a prison uniform with a big sack of money draped over his shoulder. “You were there, you remember me doing it, anyone would get turned on from that!”

Feeling her dominant side taking over, Barbie simply responds, “Keep your mouth open~.” Mara starts with shock at the sudden change in tone from the Arcana, but she guesses you can always reverse a tarot card… She obeys, closing her eyes and sticking her tongue out of her mouth. “And spread your legs a little more okay~? Hands above your head, too~.” Mara makes the pose Barbie wants, her eyes clamped shut out of shame. “Oh, one more thing. Eyes open, please. You should see it coming~.” 

God dammit. Mara opened her eyes, staring up at the sheep girl standing above her. She watches as Barbie smiles down at her, watches as the softness in her eyes turns into a sadistic glee, watches as her fingers press down on the soft flesh above her bladder, and watches as… 

Piss hits her in the forehead, just like Barbie’d gotten it first, too. It’s hot, steamy in the morning cold, and she can immediately feel it start to drip around her features, leaking down the sides of her face and into her hair. Mara had to close her eyes to keep them safe, but the stream wouldn’t focus on that spot for long. 

The saltiest taste imaginable hits Mara all at once as Barbie redirects her piss into Mara’s mouth, and it takes Mara all of her willpower to make it so that she doesn’t gag from it. “Eyes open, watch me pee on your tongue,” Barbie says happily. Mara obeys, forcing her eyelids apart so she can see the yellow liquid pour from Barbie’s puffy cunt and into her own mouth. She can feel it start to pool inside, and she has no choice but to swallow it, drinking Barbie’s pee right from the source. The heavy, salty flavor hitting the back of her throat is almost enough to make Mara tear up. 

It keeps coming, the warmth trailing down Mara’s body. She feels it splash against her tiny tits, staying there long enough to thoroughly soak both in the hot golden shower, before moving further down, drizzling across her stomach and making a pool form in the slope of her sternum. She feels it against her crotch, and based on how long Barbie chooses to aim the pee at Mara’s pussy, she has a feeling she knows why there was a request for her legs to be spread. After that, it goes back up, trailing piss across her stomach and chest again before going back into her mouth. Mara coughs and spurts around it, sending some of it down her cheeks and chin, but in the end swallows as much as she can. The stream gets weaker, and as Mara feels the last of it taper off, she looks up to see-

Barbie is much closer than before. Before she finishes peeing altogether, she sits on Mara’s face, rubbing her moist cunt into the elf’s tongue. “Drink,” Barbie states dominantly, and Mara obeys, lapping at Barbie’s folds one more time as the faun’s piss flows out of her and into Mara’s waiting mouth, overwhelming Mara’s sense of taste. When Barbie’s bladder is finally empty, she stands, leaving Mara gasping with her mouth still agape. 

After taking a moment to recover, wiping the liquid from her face, Mara sighs, closing her mouth and allowing herself to breathe. “So, um… that was…” she begins, but gets cut off by a hoof against her stomach. “WH-!?”

“Who said we were done, Mara~?” Barbie asks, her aura of dominance so strong now that Mara can feel its heat. “I wanted to ask if you had any left, actually~.” The hoof presses down lightly against her bladder, and despite having already relieved herself, like, 20 minutes ago, she could feel the pressure building. 

“R-really?” Mara asks, already sounding thoroughly punished, she doesn’t need more punishment, does she? “Do I have to?” 

“Well, I told you to, so…” Barbie trails off as she rotates her ankle, renewing the pressure on Mara’s bladder without even having to press down harder. 

“Uggh…” Mara groans, but… she asked for this. Specifically requested a punishment, if she remembers correctly. “Okay…” Barbie removes her hoof and takes a few steps back so she can watch. To tell the truth, Barbie had about as much love for piss play as she did for squirrels, but this did seem to be helping Mara *a lot*. The avatar of temperance hopes that Mara can find herself a nice, harsh dominatrix soon to keep her anxieties down~.

As Barbie smiles down at her, Mara… lets it loose. She feels herself leaking, only a trickle because of how little there was, but that was almost worse, because instead of leaving her in a safe arc, it just… dripped down, wetting her. “Press your legs together,” Barbie says, noticing the same. Mara whines, high and sharp, but still does as she’s told. She feels her crotch and inner thighs start to get warm as the liquid coated them, and Barbie giggles at the sight of pee pooling in her thigh gap. “Thank you, Mara~,” she coos, and Mara feels an explosion in her chest at the soft reassurance. Barbie was right, she *really* needed her own dom. 

She pees herself for a few more seconds before it slowed, feeling herself puddle around her ass, warming and wetting her body. When she was finally done, she let her legs separate, the small pool that had formed dripping back down over her soaked cunny. Barbie smiles, leaning over and offering a hand to the elf, asking, “Do you feel better now~?”  


Mara has to be honest. “So much…” 

\- - -

Luckily, it didn’t take as long for skin to dry as it took for clothes to dry. Mara felt utterly filthy, having been laying in a pool of mud, faun piss, and *her* piss, but after Barbie helped her get at least a bit cleaner with some donated wool, she figured the hassle of having to take a bath as soon as she could didn’t outweigh the benefits. After the watersports were over and they were both cleaned off, Barbie and Mara sucked on each other’s tits and masturbated until Lydia got back, neither of them owing the other anything this time. It felt amazing to just… be with someone, letting herself relax after so much stress had built up.

When Lydia arrived, Barbie quickly got dressed… along with Mara, who’d been naked when the hobgoblin showed up. Lydia scowled for a second, but just rolled her eyes and turned around until the elf was decent. Mara was, after all, keeping up her end of the bargain, technically. With her cute outfit restored, the tube top and matching overalls covering the round, soft features that Mara had quickly grown to appreciate, Barbie was ready to head off. “It was nice meeting the two of you~!” she coos, all semblance of her dominant streak totally replaced with her fluffy, kind personality. “I hope to see you again, sometime~!”

“You, too~!” Mara says, giddy after all the comfort. “And be careful out there!”

“I’ll be okay~!” Barbie responds, and even if Lydia’s a bit skeptical at that, Mara has a feeling that the faun has quite a bit hidden up her sleeves for any wolf that might try to get to her. 

As Barbie wanders back into the woods, Mara sighs peacefully and says, “She was nice.” In many ways~. She looks over to Lydia, sees the hobgoblin rolling her eyes, and just giggles. “So, we gonna get going, or what~?”

Lydia’s brow furrows. “We ate our horse-ghosts last night, idiot, I’ve been waiting all morning for you to make more.”

“Ah! Right, shit, okay, gimme a sec…!” Mara rushes off to go find the material to make more hopefully-soulless horses. She really hopes that she isn’t bringing actual living creatures into the world just for them to be eaten later, but she’s still really not sure how it works, if we’re being honest. Fingers crossed! With that, though, they were off. Their first tower couldn’t be that far off, Lydia said, and Mara was prepared. Maybe a bit dirtier than she’d have preferred, but more than prepared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Profile #7: Symbol of personal moderation, Temperance Arcana  
> Real Name: Barbie  
> Species: Lamb Faun  
> Age: 24  
> Height: 5’3”  
> Hair: White Wool  
> Skin: Pale  
> Position: Switch (Prefers Dom), Vers  
> Love: 4, Lust: 4, Power: 2, Charisma: 3, Intelligence: 1  
> Turn-ons: Post-Orgasm Play, Humping, Edging, Outdoor Sex, Somnophilia  
> Turn-offs: Pain, Quickies, Dirty Wool  
> Arcana Ability - Temperance - She can either half the cost of a mage’s spells, or double their effectiveness in exchange for a toll on the user’s body.  
> Lust Gift - Endless Chalice - Liquid in this cup will never run low until you pour in a new liquid.  
> “Once a lazy lout, her life changed when she gained the temperance arcana. She still has some moments of sloth here and there, but not as often”


	8. Towers...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The moment you’ve all been waiting for! A princess awaits the first of our heroes!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut rating - 2/5??? IDK this system is arbitrary as hell
> 
> Updates are slowing, yes, but in my defense I'm depressed as hell!!! B)!!! Writing smut cheers me up though so hopefully this can be the one thing in life I am consistent with B)!!!!! I have 4 more chapters already written, just in need of re-reads and revisions, though, so there'll at least be that many.

Selby felt nice. Last night had been just… wow. And this morning wasn’t much worse, to be honest. There might have been… just a *bit* more of, um… some more, you know, like… close… the two of them… Selby sucked his cock again. Oops! Oswald kinda woke up to getting his dick sucked, what can they say! They are! Horny!

Anyway, they’d packed up camp and got back onto the road in a hurry once they were both awake and standing, unlike Mara and Lydia. Oswald, knowing his trusted courtier was chipper and bubbly, felt much better prepared for the challenge ahead. And for winning that bet! Oswald had made sure that Selby and Lydia both had pocket watches on their persons, so the instant Oswald and whatever princess was up ahead were safely within the carriage’s confines, he’d make sure Selby got the time down. Victory was just as guaranteed as the safety of whoever was in his care. 

Speaking of… “Th-that’s it, isn’t it?” Selby asks as the carriage rounds a corner. Oswald looks up and sees a spire of stone jutting out of a clearing and up into the sky at an odd angle. Its peak was high above the trees, high enough to make jumping from the square window at the top floor seem like a very bad idea. It was identical to the one Oswald had visited in his travels as a young boy, though with a much more scenic backdrop, here in the neutral kingdom’s forest. 

“Indeed,” he says with a hum. “This is where we’re heading.” He pulls sharply on the carriage’s reins, pulling the horses off the road and into some bushes. 

“S-sir Oswald…?” Selby asks shakily, “Wh-what are you doing? D-don’t we have to, um… g-get there? First?” The tower was big enough to see from pretty far off, and it looked like at least a 20 minute walk from where they were now. 

“I’m hiding the wagon, dear squire~!” he answers jauntily. “If anything follows us out of there, I don’t want it harming our only means of escape, hoho~!” Selby sighed. That was… yeah, they get the sense behind that, but… couldn’t it get hidden, you know…? A little closer? “Now come!” Oswald declares once the horses and buggy are all thoroughly hidden from the road, shrouded by trees and shrubs. Oswald jumps from his seat and lands with a clinky thud on the forest floor. Holding up his hand, offering it to Selby for them to use to safely descend, he says, “Let us be off to our first victory, friend!”

Selby pauses for a second, but then smiles sweetly and takes his hand. Okay, if hand-holding was involved, then Selby guesses it can’t be that bad~.

\- - -

Selby was wrong, it was bad. Even with Oswald’s cheerful humming, walking so far on uneven ground with the knowledge that there was only danger at the end of the journey was torture for them. Oswald, on the other hand, was only getting more excited as they drew closer. This was it, he was finally going to put years of training to use. He would invade the tower, conquer whatever trials it had in store for him, and save the damsel in distress. This is what he was born for. 

Selby was starting to think they’d been born for tailoring or floristry or something else that involved far less danger and walking, but that was neither here nor there. What *was* here was the tower. They’ve reached its gates, two large, wooden double doors, big enough to allow even giantesses passage; the dragon princesses would often come and go to taunt their captives during the first tower war, so everything about the towers were sized for their sake. 

From a human’s perspective, this made everything seem rather grand. Oswald lays a palm against the reinforced iron of the handle, feeling heroism surge through his body as he prepared to throw open the door that was thrice his size. “A-are we, um… d-def-f-fini-itely ready…?” Selby stammers, much less enthusiastic about whatever’s on the other side. “Y-you still don’t, um… e-even have… a new sword, yet…” 

It was true, he’d lost his trusty sidearm during the encounter with the Big Bad Wolf. Oswald wouldn’t back down, though. Fear was the furthest thing from his mind. “I’ve never been more ready for anything!” he declares, pulling the door open with all his might, exposing the tower’s inner workings to the light of day. 

As soon as he did, Selby’s heart sank. They had to take several steps back so they wouldn’t be afraid of falling in on accident. “Wh-what!? Why is…!?” They could feel the heat on their face as soon as Oswald opened the door and exposed the room with a wide pool of lava instead of a floor. “H-how did they even g-g-get that in here!?”

“Hm!” Oswald hums, “Very curious indeed!” His tone heavily contrasts Selby’s meek fear with bright optimism. “You’d think it likely a bygone of the dragon age, but the old puzzles and traps were all but cleaned out by knights like myself! This is a wolven original! Quite incredible, hoho~!”

Selby is several feet away, not wanting to take any chances, and, frankly, wishing Oswald would take a few steps back himself. “H-how do… how do we even…?” The circumference of the room must’ve been 30 feet around, its outer walls the same as the walls of the tower itself. The pool of lava, its bubbling surface even with the dirt ground outside, covered the whole floor. The only thing but lava in the room was another wooden door, but it was all the way on the other side of the room. It wasn’t like they could jump across… “Sh-should we just… climb… the outside…?” Glancing at the tower, though, they could see the stone walls were polished smooth. Maybe an insect or someone made of duct tape could climb up, but humans without any rope or grappling hooks were probably a lost cause.

“No need to worry, dear squire~!” Oswald announced, “This is simply a puzzle for a competent mind to solve through deduction! That’s what these towers are designed for, after all~!”

“They’re… d-designed t-... to be b-b-broken into?”

“All we have to do is uncover the solution to the puzzle!” Oswald says, ignoring the question. “Hm, building a bridge of branches is no use, they’d burn up. And we lack a bucket, so there’s no collecting water to douse the flames… curious, very curious. Perhaps it’s fake lava? Though who would want to check, eh? Hoho!”

Selby sighs. Oswald was definitely committed to this, and they doubted they could say anything to change his mind, no matter how long they whined. So instead of running away, they take a few steps closer, not close enough to be in danger, just close enough to see a bit more of the room in question. It truly was just… a giant pool of lava with walls on all sides. The ceiling was high, accounting for the dragons, and there was obviously no furniture or anything of the like jutting from the pool… Looking as close as they can, though… “O-oh! Sir Oswald, l-look at the inside walls!”

While the outside of the tower was as smooth as can be, the inner walls seemed jagged and rough. It didn’t exactly look safe for rock climbing, but they might not have another choice! “Ah, good eye, friend~!” Oswald responds, reaching out to the left to test the firmness of the rock… and immediately breaking a piece off. “Whoops!” Luckily, he didn’t put any of his weight on it, but he didn’t have a decent enough grip on the brittle stone to keep it from falling from his grasp and straight into the pool. Immediately upon hitting the fiery surface, the rock sinks in and causes a pillar of lava to erupt from its spot, blasting heat in all directions. Oswald can almost feel his armor singe with the wave of heat that hits him. “Ah.” 

“ARE YOU OKAY!?” Selby shouts, startled into falling backwards. “Th-that was-!? What was that!?”

Oswald scratches his helmet’s chin, saying, “I was right, it *is* fake lava! Real lava wouldn’t have exploded nearly as violently.” 

“Th-that doesn’t… that’s not good…” Selby wants to give up. They thought there would just be soldiers inside or something, people for Oswald to beat up, take some loot from, and move on past. They *knew* he could handle something like that, but they had no idea how *anyone* was supposed to figure something like this out. 

Oswald, though, is far from giving up. Humming to himself as always, he looks closer. What were the key pieces to this puzzle? There was lava, of course, along with falling rocks and explosions. How could he turn those to his advantage? He looks around the whole room, examining everything very, very carefully. Then, formulating a plan, he rakes his hand across the wall with a claw-like fist, sending as many of those rocks down into the pool as possible before retreating a few steps. 

Indeed, lava splashes violently out of the tower, just barely missing the spot where Oswald’s arm had been moments before. Selby squeaks with surprise as they hear the eruption, watching as lava pyres up into the air and then falls back down. When everything calms, though… “S-sir Oswald! Th-that’s so smart!” In the space where the rocks had fallen, there now jutted up a small stone platform, barely the size of Selby’s foot, because of the pile of rocks Oswald had sent down. Not exactly a bridge, but with enough work, it could definitely become one. “A-all we need to do is p-push enough rocks into th-the, um… in there!”

“Oh?” Oswald asks, looking down. “Ah! Marvelously astute observation, Selby! That’s a wonderful plan!” He crosses his arms and nods proudly for his courtier. “And here I was, trying to burn a hole through the roof, hoho!” Selby deflates a bit when they realize Oswald wasn’t, er… *as* clever as they were assuming, but… they had a plan now, at least!

Oswald continues the process of scraping stone into lava, stepping back, and then coming back to repeat the process. Soon, there was enough of a plateau forming that Oswald could take a step into the room. It was dangerous, being so close to the volatile fluid, but the more rocks Oswald got into the lava, the easier the work became. With more space to stand, there was more wall to access. With more wall, the floor started appearing quicker, less and less magma remaining. Within minutes, almost the whole room was able to be stepped across, leading right up to the single door in the room. 

“Amazing work, Sir Oswald~!” Selby says once they can see the path ready, fear finally subsiding enough for them to step into the tower themself. The ground was still… a bit shaky, but… “L-l-let’s k-kee-keep m-moving, okay…?”

“I couldn’t agree more~!” Oswald says, opening the next door. On the other side was a staircase, hugging the outer wall of the tower and leading upwards. “Forward!” He sounded *very* excited as he began to climb the stairs, Selby trailing close behind. 

As the pair climb higher, they pass a few doors that Oswald firmly instructs Selby to ignore. Either barracks or storage rooms, he remembers, completely useless to them. “Isn’t it, um… o-odd that no one’s… here?” Selby asks meekly, looking at the ignored doors over their shoulder.

“The wolf army might still be too distracted with the cities and castles to be idly manning towers,” Oswald answers calmly. “That, or they’re all laying in wait just behind all of those tertiary doors, hoho~!” Selby clasps both hands onto one of his wrists after he says that. “Either way, though, nothing in there should be of any concern!” They needed to reach the next main floor. 

After what feels like 10 stories of stairs, all steep and hard for Selby to mount, they finally come across the top of the staircase. “I… I really… uh-under… est-t-timated the… amount… of walking…” Selby stutters, struggling to catch their breath. 

“Your rest will be well worth it, once we’re on the road again, dear squire!” Oswald says, opening the door carefully, making sure he’s not about to step into lava or whatever other caustic fluid the tower holds. It’s just floor, though. Normal stone floor, for about a foot, anyway, until the corridor is completely blocked off by black iron statues. 

Metallic figures obstruct progress, their poses intertwining with each other and only allowing sparse view past, and only towards the next set of statues behind them. The door that presumably waits at the end of the corridor isn’t even visible, just more black statues. The figures themselves all appear to be princesses, based on the sculpted crowns on their heads; their variety is also a dead give-away, with humans, elves, orcs, trolls, insectkin, goblins, ghosts, all sorts of different women from different kingdoms. All of them are performing attacks, either holding weapons locked in place with another’s, or firing a spell towards someone, the sculpted blast of fire or lightning taking up even more space in the corridor than a sword or hammer would. Lastly, but most immediately noticeably, every figure was nude, the breasts, vaginas, and occasional cocks of the princesses all being lovingly rendered in iron. 

“Well now!” Oswald accounces, “How different from the puzzle downstairs! I was expecting something fire- or island-related based on the lava bridge, but this seems entirely separate from the themes I had in mind.” Oswald leans forward, examining the iron face of a kobold princess thrusting a dagger towards an orc. “I wonder who’s stored here.” 

Selby tears their eyes away from the frozen scene of violence and sex to direct their attention to Oswald instead. Why are they all naked…? “Wh-what do you m-mean…?” Selby asks, “Th-the princess we’re here for…?” 

“Indeed, Selby!” Oswald raises a hand to pat them for their intuition, then remembers better and simply gives a thumbs-up. “Back in the dragon days, these towers would be stocked full of traps and baddies that were themed around the princesses inside! If that holds true today, I’m not sure what I’m expecting up on the top floor, hoho~!” He was more than eager to find out, though. “As for now, we need to find a way past these facades!”

“Can’t you… um, c-can you m-move them…? Or just… break…? Them?” They were just statues, even if they were blocking the way now, they couldn’t be invulnerable.” 

Placing a gauntlet upon the frozen arm of the kobold, Oswald answers, “No, they seem to be rooted in place. And they’re quite sturdy, too!” He tries to shake the figure, but no luck. Her iron feet almost seem grafted onto the stone floor beneath them. Clenching down around the arm, he feels no give, and he knows the statues are solid metal. Even from a Grand Knight, no amount of punches and kicks would be enough to shatter this many hunks of iron, at least not without damaging something he needs for further princess-saving. “I’m afraid we’ll have to find a less-conventional solution.” 

Selby looks around the room. The statues were so numerous and tightly interlaced, it would take a slime to crawl through without moving them. And other than those, there was nothing around except for the wall behind them and- wait, what was that? Selby closes the door they’d come in through, and sees an iron plaque attached to the wood. Only two words are carved into the metal face: ‘Past Mistakes.’ 

“Sir Oswald…? What do you th-think this means…?” Oswald turns to see the sign, and simply hums curiously. Turning back to the scene in front of him, he tries connecting the dots. They were in neutral territory, and the statues and lava had to be related somehow. Were those truly clues, or were the wolves simply remixing old concepts they lifted from the dragons? Past mistakes, in relation to princesses fighting… 

His best guess is, “This may be in reference to the first tower war? Prior to the dragons’ assault on the realm, the many kingdoms were locked in many bitter rivalries. How strange.” Everything put together, he *might* have an idea of which princess was trapped here, but that did nothing to solve the puzzle that would get him to her. 

Selby looked back at the horde of naked statues. “Why aren’t they f-f-... they fighting anym-more…?” Selby knew many of the kingdoms were still on edge, but none had an all-out war going on. Especially not naked ones.

“Well, post-dragons, they put their differences aside to join hands in ensuring mutual survival. Almost all of them having been bedded by the same knight didn’t hurt their opinions of one another, though!” No good partner wants a partner’s partner’s death, that’d just be rude. No one other than the old Dog Princess, anyway, but the famed Sir Knight had her muzzled, Oswald thinks. “In the generations following, the bonds only strengthened, for the most part. Now everyone’s on too good terms to start frivolous wars~!” Unlike Mara, Oswald could fight *and* he knew things. 

“...so their p-problems were s-s-solved by…?” By having to share a dick. They all got along because they were in bed together as much as they were at diplomacy meetings. “W-wait, d-does that mean the solut-t-tion is…!?” If ‘past mistakes’ were solved by everyone getting fucked by the same guy, then…

Oswald bows his head. “You *may* be onto something, dear Selby!”  
“But… but that’s so weird!” They wanted him to fuck a statue!? How would the wolves who were going to be guarding the tower get up to the princess, did they need an iron orgy every time she had food brought to her!? What the fuck, who designed this!?

“No reason not to try, though!” Oswald says, clapping his hands. “We’ll have to reach the princess somehow, and if this is the way to do it, then I have no complaints!” He didn’t? None at all? Those things couldn’t feel pleasant. 

As Oswald undid the buckle of his grieves, Selby was still apprehensive. They reach out to feel the cold metal of the statues, resting their hand on a cat princess’s stomach, and the sensation sends a chill up their spine. Who would wanna have sex with someone made of metal, Selby wonders uncritically, completely ignoring the fact Oswald never took his armor off and they fantasized about his dick in their ass all night. Anyway, would Oswald even be *able* to fuck these things? Very few of them had spread legs, would it even fit?

They slide their hand down the statue to the vaginal area and… find that it’s a lot softer than the rest of the thing is. Oh. Oh that’s weird. It was cold and unreactive, more like a silicone than flesh, but it definitely felt fuckable. Why would someone make this? Whose fetish is this and why are the metal and sex toy parts blended together so seamlessly? 

As Selby questions why the world needs to work this way, Oswald has already gotten his dick out. It’s a bit limp, still, because even he has to admit, he’s not super excited about fucking this many inanimate objects. “Er, Selby, my friend?” he says, a bit more awkwardly than his normal voice, “Would it be too much of a bother to ask for a helping hand, for a moment?” 

Selby looked over and saw, uh… yeah, yeah that made sense. “Um… y-yeah, o-okay…” They walk over to his side and slowly wrap their fingers around his flaccid shaft, giving a few soft pulls to help him get ready for, ahem, puzzle solving. Their face begins turning a light shade of pink as they feel him harden in their hand. “Is, um… is this okay?” 

“Quite alright, dear friend!” Oswald chimes, not seeming phased by the casual handjob at all. “Thank you greatly for the assistance!” He gives them a couple headpats as a reward~.

Selby’s face gets much redder, and then they >:T. “You d-did that on p-purpose!” they say grumpily as they pump him rougher with their hand. 

“Perhaps!” Oswald teases. He has to admit, it gave the effect he wanted. Their increased speed and blushing face definitely helped him along. Eventually he’s hard enough to pull away from his friend and say, “Well, time to put this theory to the test, I suppose!” He approaches the iron kobold, a thankfully crouched figure, and does his best to position himself so that this will go over well. Seeing as how the statue is completely unmoving, it’s a bit tricky at first, but he’s eventually able to fully position his member in front of the artificial scalie pussy. 

He prods at the iron facade’s hole with his head, making sure it will indeed be softer than it’d seem, and upon feeling it more welcoming than damaging, thrusts forward to penetrate it. Still blushing, Selby asks, “D-do you… feel anything?”

“Indeed!” Oswald says, “There seems to be some ribbing within the inner walls of this curious item. Definitely meant for this purpose, if you’d believe it!”

“...” Selby cannot believe they’re falling for this guy. “I-I meant… if it… something puzzle r-related?”

“Ah! Then no, not yet.” It seems that simply putting himself inside wasn’t *quite* enough. “Let me try…” He pulls himself out about halfway before thrusting back in. He does it again and again, actually fucking the world’s least soft sexdoll. Even if this doesn’t work, at least he can say it felt okay? 

After a few moments of repeated penetration, though, the iron statue rumbles. Just a low vibrating, not enough to damage anything, but it’s noticeable. “B-be careful…!” Selby says, cringing at the thought of something going wrong. With a few more thrusts, though, a sound emerges from within the metal. 

“Ahn~!” Not an organic voice, more like a magical pre-recording, but it gets the point across. After moaning, the statue’s physical form fades, vanishing within Oswald’s grasp and disappearing altogether. 

“Well, well!” Oswald says, standing back up, cock still erect. “It would seem we’re onto something, eh~?”

“Y-yay…” What joy, they get to watch Oswald have fun with… all these inanimate objects. That was… good. 

Oswald wastes no time. He moves towards the orc statue that had been positioned to fight the kobold next. Hooking his hands on the tall, fake woman’s elbows, he enters it from behind, fucking its artificial pussy until the same, tinny “Ahn~!” comes from it, as well. It seems whatever mage constructed this puzzle didn’t feel like getting more than one moan recorded… 

No matter, because Oswald is eager to get past this sooner rather than later. Without pause, he proceeds to a slender elf with a bow and arrow. Then, to a rotund goblin holding bombs above her head. Going straight down the middle of the room, wanting to carve a path through to the next door, he takes a centaur next, having to practically ride it in order to fuck it into nonexistance. Moving onto one of the human princesses, this one with an erect cock as she lobs a fireball, he finds that the anuses of the statues are just as soft and built for cock as the pussies. He moves through a dwarf, an imp, a sphinx, a minotaur, a manticore, about 3 different elves. After only a few, he was starting to feel the heat a bit, so to speak, and by the end, his length was starting to become slick, despite the sex dolls being utterly moistureless. 

The last statue, at least the last one in the way of the door, is a wyvern with a shield. Oswald needs to duck under an axe from a spear from two separate, more out of the way statues, as well as the shield the wyvern itself held to even get to the fuckhole. Laying on his back and with a good half of his body beneath the ironwork, though, he manages to thrust himself upwards into the waiting cocksleeve. It lasts the longest, but after a minute or two of steady thrusting, Oswald hears the last magical moan as the facade melts away into the aether. And with that, he can see the door handle awaiting him. 

“Phew!” he cries, sounding just a bit tired from the endeavor. “That was definitely a work-out, aha!” Selby has been watching this whole time. Their eyes focused less on the statue women that Oswald was going through, and more on the knight himself whenever he was fully in view. They were very aware of the fact that he had been getting coated in his own pre-cum. Oswald stands and says, “Now that that’s over with, we can-” 

He’s cut off by a soft hand wrapping around his fully erect cock. Selby had approached from behind while he’d been focused on the door leading upwards. “We don’t want to meet the princess without dealing with this first, do we?” Selby whispers, beginning to stroke him softly. 

Oswald’s taken off guard at first, but the warmth of Selby’s body is *very* welcome after all that cold metal and silicone. “Is this… revenge for the headpat?” 

“Maybe~,” Selby answers, hugging him tightly with their free arm. “You… you seem close, this won’t take long~.” They weren’t lying, their stroking was already making audibly wet sounds. Oswald can’t seem to find himself disagreeing, so he places a hand over the one Selby has wrapped around his midsection, making a shock of emotion jolt into Selby’s body. They pick up the pace of their stroking, leaning into his back to hold themself steady. 

Oswald wasn’t going to deny that fucking a variety of differently-textured sex toys for the past fifteen minutes hadn’t gotten him a bit riled up. Knowing they’d have to be coming through here again soon, though, he’d avoided cumming into a statue that would simply vanish once he was done with it, the princess shouldn’t have to see something like that. W-wait, speaking of… “It might be best, dear squire, if you swallow this time… For the princess’s sake, of course.” 

He can try and sound all cool and professional all he wants, but it just makes Selby snicker. It was cute how he kept up with that stuff even while getting jacked off. “Yes, sir,” Selby coos before stepping around Oswald’s form and getting on their knees. They keep stroking him, squeezing down as hard as they can with their tiny, soft hand. They look up at Sir Oswald’s face, right into his helmet’s visor, and open their mouth wide, sticking their tongue out sluttily. 

Oswald responds by grasping their face and thrusting himself into it, penetrating their throat and fucking it roughly. They’d done this twice already, but Selby was still getting used to the feeling of being face-fucked, so they sputtered around his cock just a bit as his length ran along their tongue and down their throat. Not that they mind when they feel his hot load start to squirt out, filling their mouth and forcing their cheeks to puff to keep it all in. Feeling him pulling out makes them sputter even more, though, a few drops of cum ending up on their face rather than in their stomach, but they greedily swallow whatever they’re able. The two of them might not be alone together very often once princesses start joining their party, so Selby savors every second of this while they can get it. 

It doesn’t take long for Oswald’s orgasm to end, though, or for his full length, now slick with spit, to be removed from their face hole. Selby breathes heavily once their airway is free, wiping their face free of spit and cum with the back of their hand as they regain their breath. “Well,” Sir Oswald says happily, tucking himself back into his pants, “Thank you very much, friend, but I believe we have a princess to meet.” 

He extends a hand down to Selby to help them up, making Selby smile sweetly at the gesture. Sure, this tower business might suck, but if it sucks *this* way, it can’t be all that bad~. 

\- - -

There’s another flight of stairs leading them up higher into the tower, past more doors, and with the added discomfort of knowing that they were many, many yards into the sky by now. Selby’s almost glad there weren’t any windows, as far as they could tell, because they did not want to look down. Oswald, as always, was unphased. This was it. They should be near the top now. All they had to do was open one more door, and a princess was as good as saved. The first of many for his career as Grand Knight. His heart was racing even more now than when Selby was sucking him off a minute ago. 

When the iron door leading into what should be the bedchambers comes into sight, Oswald practically leaps up the remaining stairs to get to it. “Careful, Selby!” he says, taking no heed of his own warnings, “The bedchambers have also been known to bear traps, just as the lower floors did! Don’t take anything for granted!” 

“I’ll… I’ll be c-careful!” they respond, short of breath. The only thing keeping them from feeling like they were about to collapse was the aftertaste of cum on the back of their tongue, which caused an airy feeling in their mind each time they remembered it was there. 

Oswald reaches the door. This was it. This was his moment. He could practically *feel* Mara still wandering through the forest, trying to find her way to her own tower. This wasn’t just his first act as a knight, this was a triumph. He could feel it in his bones. He throws open the door to reveal the bedchambers within, pride booming through his chest. 

The room beyond the door was a wreck. There was a bed by the wall that had been flipped over, its mattress torn through. The doors leading to the other rooms of the suite were ajar, looking ripped open by some kind of animal. Linens and papers were strewn across the floor as if a hurricane had blown through the room, most of them shredded to pieces by now. The wardrobe was knocked over, its contents a charred mess. The princess was nowhere to be seen. 

Selby, not even knowing what they were looking at, quietly said, “W-what h-h-happened here…?” They could receive no answer. Even as possibilities of being too late or of wolf cruelty swept through Oswald’s mind in an instant, all the worst possibilities in front of him, a sound very unlike him answered Selby’s question. It was a low rumble, like a feral animal growling with fury. It was far away at first, but grew closer in an instant. 

A head the size of Oswald’s entire body burst through one of the doors, the purple-scaled, triangular head of a great beast. Its teeth shone brightly, smoke billowed from its nostrils, a chained collar holding it in place within the tower walls. It seemed almost too big to fit within the room, until one noticed the slight gleam coming off one of its horns. 

Selby nearly tumbled down the stairs as the creature roared upon seeing the two of them. The squire cowered in the corner of the stairwell, sure that this monster was going to blast them with fire until they were singed to crisps. “SLAY IT!!!” they yell to Oswald, urging him to put his knightly skills to work. Surely this beast must be guarding the princess, surely that is the last ‘puzzle’ for them to conquer. 

Oswald smirked under his helmet, knowing far better. It seemed his theory from before about who would be waiting for them at the top was correct. He calmly walked into the room that the dragon’s head had entered, the snarling beast bringing its long neck past the doorway. Oswald was met with a single, grand claw, swiping at him after just barely managing to squeeze into the room. As Selby screamed with fear, Oswald knew exactly what to do. The dragon roared again, blind with rage, and brought its mighty hand down hard on the space Oswald had been standing microseconds before. The knight, though, simply leapt up to the claw in question, bouncing off one of its spiked toes and towards the beast’s face. Just as flames begin to brew within its jagged jaw, however, Oswald reaches up and grabs the collar just below its scaly chin. With a single yank, the chain breaks, and a flash of purple light engulfs the room. 

Selby’s eyes snap shut, and in the confusion, they worry something awful has happened. “SIR OSWALD!?” they yell, worried for his life as he seems to have just jumped right into the beast’s maw. 

“Fear not, dear squire!” he calls out after them, the light in the room returning to normal, the soft sunlight from the window against the far wall illuminating the ruined bedchambers. “We’re both more than fine!”

At Oswald’s feet, a figure much smaller than it had been moments before laid among the wreckage of her former suite. With the collar administering a beast’s curse to her body now shattered, the true form of the dragon becomes clear. Still large, but not the size of a whole building, the 10-ft tall woman slumps to her knees in front of the knight. 

Her scales were a soft lavender, a darker, deeper purple making up her horns, with a pale, almost pink shade for her underbelly. Her figure was easy to see, with all that remained of her dress being ripped tatters; even with an hourglass figure, she was of a healthy weight for someone of her height, her arms, legs, breasts, and stomach plump under her scales. Her unfortunate dress droops down over her shoulders as more of a rag than an outfit, revealing her breasts to the knight and squire - round and ample, with scaled, purple nipples at their peaks - along with the faintest hint of the blushing, pink scales of her pussy just under the hem of the ruined fit. Her neck was long, just like the dragons of old, and speckled with darker and lighter shades of mauve, making her throat almost resemble dyed cobblestone. Her wings were large, but delicate-looking, their flesh a deep, almost shimmering purple. A large, reptilian tail hung limply from just above her ass, bearing deep mauve spikes near its tip. Her eyes, though lidded, shine with a sparkling magenta. 

Finally, most importantly, a crown rests upon her head, right in the middle of the mess of horns she possesses. As the Dragon Princess regains her bearings, breathing hard as she takes in the situation as a whole, she pulls her tattered dress back up over her breasts and says, “May I… please have a moment… to myself… Please?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Profile #8: Reformed Reptilian Kingdom’s, Dragon Princess  
> Real Name: Ryspe  
> Species: Dragon  
> Age: 22  
> Height: 9’9”  
> Scales: Lavender, Purple, Mauve  
> Horns: Dark Purple  
> Position: Sub, Vers  
> Love: 2, Lust: 2, Power: 3, Charisma: 3, Intelligence: 4  
> Turn-ons: Creampie, Hyper, Mile High Club, Horn-Pulling, Dominant Partners  
> Turn-offs: Rough Sex, Toys, TF  
> Dowries - The Old Draconic Bikini gives anyone wearing it a shiny set of scales, or makes scaly people fleshy instead. Wearing the Platinum Lord’s Ring makes any hole, no matter how large, feel tight around the wearer’s body.   
> Lust Gift - Dragon Queen’s Crown - Holds the secrets to ancient histories, and can summon all five (now much milfier) ex-princesses from the Grand Tower Kingdom.   
> “The lone princess of the once great dragon empire. She’s under constant scrutiny from every other kingdom, while her own people expect her to return them to greatness.”  
> \- - -  
> It's the first princess of the series, and guess what! Yeah, you may have noticed the Post-Canon tag up there. A lot of the princesses, even the ones from official charts, aren't going to resemble the originals very closely. This is gonna be a very loose rule, bc there are a lot of designs I like so much I'll just want to keep using them! Lydia and Selby look pretty close to their canon appearances, after all. But for a lot of princesses, especially the more, uh... *problematic* ones... I'm gonna put my own spin on their concepts. Dragon Princesses 1-5 were fine and all, and may show up in some capacity later on, given a certain someone's Lust Gift, but for the story I wanted to tell with this, the dragons in particular needed a bit of an update.
> 
> So yeah, along with my own brand new princesses, designed from the ground up, one of which... might be seen in the very near future... there are also gonna be Remixed princesses. If there are any that readers wanna see relatively in-tact from their original appearances, though, feel free to make suggestions in the comments! A bunch have been pre-planned, but there are slots to fill along the way, if you get my meaning. Eyes emoji.


	9. ...and Towers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The moment you’ve all been waiting for, Mara Edition! It’s time to meet another princess!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut Rating - uhh... like 1.5? 2? let's say 2/5. I didn't feel like re-reading and revising a 2nd time like i did for all the other chapters, so sorry if its just a tad rough lmao

Mara and Lydia had been riding through the same forest for a while before the scenery started to change. The Dragon Princess’s tower had been in neutral territory, but there were only so many towers there for the wolves to store princesses in, so the pair had moved into the next land over, the Cotton Vineyard Kingdom. Whether the princesses would be held in their own kingdoms, though, would be something that remained to be seen. With a good amount of kingdoms having multiple princesses, and some princesses being without kingdom at all, there would be plenty to go around throughout the available towers. 

It wasn’t long before the standard forests of the neutral kingdom gave way to vast fields of farmland. Even in the outskirts of the kingdom, without any of the fancy, industrial farms of the capitol, Mara could see plenty of wild grapevines and cotton plants, the gently rolling, green hills of the kingdom dotted with purples and whites. Quite the sight for a prospective tourist, if you ignored the enormous slab of grey stone sticking out of the landscape. 

Mara and Lydia were able to see their target tower from much farther away than Oswald and Selby had been, without all the trees blocking their line of sight. “Almost there~!” Mara says, bouncing up and down in the carriage bed as she stares ahead. “You ready to save the day, Lyds~?”

“Never call me that again,” Lydia responds in an even tone. 

“Right, sorry, worst mistake of my life,” Mara says, still trying to keep a smile on her face. “Anyway, let’s get these horses kicked into high gear! We gotta get to ours before Oswald gets to his!” She was gonna win this for *sure*!

Lydia goes, “Tch.” Classic asshole move, Lyds, keep up the great work. “Are you really more concerned about your bet than the princesses actual safety?” 

“What? No, of course not,” Mara answers genuinely. “I mean, like… Okay, define ‘concern.’”

“You’re unbelievable.” Lydia doesn’t know why she’s surprised. 

“Listen! We *know* I’m gonna save them, right? So it’s, like, more important, obvs, but it’s in the bag, y’know?” Lydia does not know. She doesn’t think that’s even slightly accurate. “But I have actually *try* to beat Oswald in a race, so I really wanna get going! Getting pregnant sucks, I’d really rather not go through that again!”

“You staked pregnancy on a b-?” Lydia stops mid-admonish as Mara’s words catch up with her. Then she feels her skin go cold at the realization. “Y-you’ve been pregnant before!?” 

“Eh, only, like… two or three times.” Mara shrugs. “Part of the erotimancy training. What better way to learn all those spells than to use them on yourself, right?” Not that she could do that for every spell, a lot of them were phallus focused. That’s what Master Smuhg was for, though~!

“*YOU* have children!?” Lydia yells, balking at the horror that is the thought of Mara as a mother. 

“No!” Mara immediately responds, astonished Lydia would jump to that so quickly. “*Obviously* someone else has ‘em!” Clearly. “Didn’t exactly think they were safe with me, on account of the whole, you know, slut thing.” She thinks she made a responsible decision, all things considered. 

Lydia’s head bows in shame for Mara’s sake. “You had children… for the sake of a *spell*... and just… dumped them somewhere. Three lives- no, you don’t even *remember* how many! What the fuck, Mara!?”

“Oh please,” the elf says, rolling her eyes, “Are you from one of those weirdo cultures that think you need, like, a single straight couple and nothing else to raise a kid? They’re *way* better off with community leaders and nurseries, being raised by people who are trained in that sort of thing, than me and *Smuhg* of all people!” Also, the magic meant her body suffered no ill-effects post-birth, so she was golden there, too! Totally in the right here, Lydia, don’t know what you’re on about!

She had them… with the guy whose name is literally synonymous with ‘asshole.’ “Whatever,” Lydia says, just wanting to ignore this aspect of Mara’s character as soon as possible. 

“So can you make the horses go faster, or-”

“Shut the fuck up.” 

\- - -

There are no woods to hide the carriage in around here, but even if there were, Mara would’ve chosen to pull up right next to the tower anyway. When you can just make new wagons whenever you want, it was hard to feel like it was worth it trying to preserve them from ambush. As the horses come to a stop in front of the large doors of the tower, Mara hops out excitedly, her robe and dress fluttering around through the air as she does. Her pussy might get shown off for a second, but who cares, Lydia’s not watching. 

“Alright~!” Mara yells excitedly, smiling wide. “Let’s get this bitch done!” Feeling just a bit less confident than Oswald in winning this bet, Mara wastes no time cherishing the moment, she just kicks one of the doors open and looks into the tower. Then her smile droops into a confused frown. Looking inside, the first floor of the tower seems to be just a normal, emptied out hull of a former dragon dungeon. Had the wolves really been here, after all? Maybe she was right all along, and they’d only succeeded in taking over the only city without a princess? Hm. Still keeping an eye out, because towers could be tricky, Mara takes a few steps into the plain, stone room.

Well, she thought it was stone, anyway. As soon as she’s a few feet in, she sinks into the floor all the way down to her chest, only her arms, shoulders, and head sticking out of the ground. It hadn’t been like water, or even quicksand, though, it was like falling right into a… a cushion? A really, really soft pile of plush. It’d be a perfect place to take a nap if it weren’t so dusty.

Hearing Mara yelp a bit from the fall, Lydia picks up the pace in joining the mage, feeling pissed-offedness rising because the impatient slut hadn’t waited for her. “Mara! Are you oka-” Then she sees Mara’s dumb face smiling up at her from the floor, the elf enjoying the feeling of comfort being surrounded by a giant pillow brings. “What.” 

“Lydia, you’ve *got* to check this out~!” Mara calls from the ground. “It’s like a whole room is hugging me at once, it’s great~!” Mara feels like she could sink into this stuff and fall asleep forever~. 

“No?” Lydia sounds disgusted, more by the idea of hugs than by whatever this actually was, but disgusted nonetheless. “Get the fuck out of there, we have shit to do.” Oh, *now* she wanted to hurry, once Mara was enjoying herself. I see how it is. 

“Weeeeh, Lydiaaaa~!” Mara calls out, admittedly sounding… even less responsible than normal. “It’s coooool, thoooough~!” She wiggles a bit trying to emphasize how nice the plush pit was with a few sexy poses, but um… she can’t… seem to pull herself out. Oh well, that was fine, she was cool with staying here for a bit. 

Lydia, though, sane as she was, sticks out the blunt end of her spear and pokes Mara in the forehead. “Get out. Grab this if you need help.” 

Mara reaches for it at first, but then her hand just droops. “Naaah, I’m fine.” Okay, Mara was a worthless idiot on her best days, but this was too much even for her, Lydia’s deciding. She pokes at the floor-wide mattress with her hilt a bit, and spots a cloud of pink dust being given off by the impact. Whatever this shit was, it was affecting Mara with more than just comfort. 

Well, that was fine. Two can play at that game. And by ‘that game,’ Lydia means COMBAT. She flips her spear right-side-around and jams the sharp end into the mattress, which gives off an immediate reaction. Not only does the thing seem to squish down, out of the way of the attack, like it could see and dodge what Lydia had planned, but it also visibly clamped down on Mara’s submerged body. 

“OW!” the elf yells, momentarily struck from her trance. “Ow ow ow ow, don’t do that! Stop doing that, whatever it is, just don’t!” 

Lydia growls under her breath, but… she has to withdraw the spear. As much as she wanted to think she could save princesses on her own, she had to admit that she was somehow the brains of this operation, Mara was the one with all the ability. How the fuck that happened was beyond her, but Lydia doesn’t need more shit to deal with right now, so she pushes it out of her mind. “Alright… alright. This is a problem.” Glaring at Mara, she adds, “What the hell were you thinking just walking into the tower on your own!?”

“It looked like stone!” the elf shouted, inadvertently breathing in more of that noxious dust. Her shoulders droop around the mattress monster with the cobble pillowcase. “Weeeh, what even is this thing?” 

“Whatever it is, it seems like it’s alive,” Lydia answers. “It dodged my attack. Also, it’s probably slowly killing you, so you should really let me stab it to death before that happens.” Brains of the operation. 

“I’ll die anyway if that happens!” Mara sleepily yells. “Baaaah!” The floor was alive and eating her, great. It was fine, she just had to think. How does she get out of these kinds of situations normally? “...sleepy…” 

“WAKE UP!”

“Fuh!?” Mara’s head rises back up with a start at Lydia’s shout. 

“You’re getting digested, idiot, do something!” Lydia’s not being a very good brains, is she? “You’re a wizard, aren’t you!? Fire off a spell, or something! Teleport, shift planes, you must have *something* useful!”

“Not unless… it’s sex related…” She can do anything as long as it has something to do with genitals, more or less. As Lydia roars at her uselessness, though, a thought *does* pop into Mara’s head. This thing is alive, huh? Hm. “Hey,” she whispers blearily to the plush pit, “I can make you cum if you let me go.” No response. Well. Alive didn’t mean it can talk, she guesses. Might as well try anyway, if it’s either that or she dies, right? 

She swirls her fingers around and brews up a Rumbling Pleasure spell. Not exactly an insta-mega cum like she uses as an attack, just something to get this whatever it is going, if it’s really sentient after all. Pressing her hand into the plush, her hand bubbles with a dark grey, pinkish energy, sending her spell directly into the surface of the mattress. Instantly, she feels it loosen up around her, its surface starting to mildly bubble. Welp, this is working. So she turns the spell up a notch, ramping up the pleasure for this whatsit.

As the mattress trembles around her, she can feel it try to hug on tight to her body, a last-ditch effort to keep her in place and prevent her ascent up the tower. Fortunately for her, feeling a big, soft mass pressing down on her chest, stomach, and thighs does absolutely nothing to deter her. If anything, she likes it. She cranks the spell up again. Then again. The entire time, the pillow pit fruitlessly laps at her body with its folds. With her dress having ridden up when she fell in, there’s no resistance when she feels it starting to press against her pussy. She rubs her hand around the mattress’s surface in a circle coaxing it, deciding to pulse the pleasure spell at intervals instead of just blasting it down. “Do it,” she whispers, barely audible and immediately followed up by a loud yawn.

She bites down on her lip, reminding herself to stay quiet so as not to offend the hobgoblin a few feet away, as she feels the soft material enter her. This thing really *was* alive, and it felt *nice.* Mara presses her fingers into the plush, and the creature forces more of itself into her. Then it draws back and presses itself in further. Her eyelids flutter as she feels herself getting fucked, but she keeps the spell active. Having to concentrate on magic was helping her stay awake, at least.

Then she feels it hit her sweet spot. “Nn…” Okay, if she doesn’t stop this soon, she’s either gonna start moaning or fall asleep, and either way she’d get yelled at, so time to wrap this up. She’ll give the monster something nice to remember her by, at least~. She blasts off several orgasm spells, her senses coming back to her a bit as the entire floor of the tower quakes with pleasure. 

Lydia, watching this, has no idea what’s going on. She just sees the floor deflate around Mara, making the pool-like shape of the actual room clearer. Turns out there was a bridge from one door to the other winding around the side of the room. Mara’d just walked right off it. Typical. “What did you just do to that thing?” the hobgoblin asks. 

“Do you want a real answer?” Mara asks as she pulls herself up onto safe ground, leaving a wet spot behind, “Or do you want blissful ignorance.” 

Lydia thinks for about a second before answering, “Fuck it, let’s just move on.” She eyes the plush pit thing as her and Mara make their way to the next door, opening their way to the staircase leading up. Her last thought on the creature was a mix of disgust and… more disgust, it was mostly just gross. She wishes she didn’t know this thing existed. 

\- - -

Unlike Oswald, Mara stops to peek into one of the extra doors along the way to the next floor. Just as they all thought, though, the room was totally empty, the soldiers apparently not having time to occupy these forts yet. Well, better safe than sorry. Who knows when the wolves could be staging an ambush? 

After that, though, the pair climb up until they reach the next main corridor, surely just as rigged with traps as the last. Mara… would relate strongly to Selby, if she knew they were having trouble with these stairs. Stupid, tall dragons, making towers for giants. Her knees are killing her. 

Anyway, Mara doesn’t want to waste any more time, despite her sore legs. She pushes open the door to the next main room and finds… you know, a room. At first it seemed like a normal hallway, with average carpet, windows, drapes, etc. But after a second, Mara’s eyes adjust and she can see a thick fog blanketing the hall. Good thing she didn’t just run in like last time. “Is this… that sleep powder from earlier?” she asks quietly, still recovering from the effects it had on her. 

“That shit was pink,” Lydia answers, her eyes narrowing as she examines the corridor. “This looks different, probably not the same. But it’s definitely not safe, whatever it is.” She sticks the tip of her spear in for testing, but nothing happens. It just feels like stabbing the air. There aren’t any swirling dust particles, either, so this isn’t some kind of poison cloud, it’s actual fog. “Hm.” 

“Well there’s only one way to find out!” Mara says hubristically. “Just pull me out if I pass out, or something, alright?” Lydia responds with a low growl. “I’ll take that as a yes~!”

With her poorly planned out rescue decided, Mara sticks a hand into the fog. As her fingers and knuckles penetrate the mist, she feels absolutely nothing. Maybe a bit colder, but the window was open, so that could just be a draft. She reaches more of her arm in, and once her sleeve enters the fog, she can feel a slight tug, but nothing else past that. Definitely something going on, but as long as she stays on her toes, she should be good!

So she takes a step into the room, not feeling like she’s breathing in something deadly or being crushed or anything. “Hm,” she says once she’s standing in the fog, “Maybe we can just walk to the d-”

Before she can finish her sentence, Mara’s shoved out of the room. She feels a tremendous force applied to her entire torso, like a bunch of invisible hands running her down, and she practically goes flying backwards into Lydia, who is the only reason she didn’t just get launched down the stairs. Always bring a courtier, everyone! “What the hell did you do!?” Lydia barked, still recovering after having an elf shot at her like a missile.

“Nothing!” Mara retorted grumpily. “I just… *ugh,* there’s some kind of spell!” Which, like, duh, this whole room was dedicated to being a trap for knights like her, but she at least thought she’d be able to stand still without being in danger.

“Well figure out what it is, then,” Lydia says, shoving Mara off of her and back onto her own feet. “You’re the mage, you should know *at least* this much, right!?” 

Lydia would have a point if she weren’t talking to a complete moron. “I mean… I only ever *closely* studied the one kind of magic I was learning to use! And this definitely isn’t an erotimancy spell…” She doesn’t think so, anyway. “Okay, gimme a sec, um… Here, you try going in so I can watch what happens from the outside.”

“No?” Lydia answers immediately. “Why would I do that? I managed to catch you from sprawling down the stairs, that doesn’t mean you could do that for me! We’d both die!” 

“It’ll be fine!” Mara shouts, trying to pull on Lydia’s arm until she goes into the room on her own. “Listen, it’ll be way easier to tell what kind of spell this is if I can see it happening to someone else. Pleeeeaaase~?”

Lydia smacks Mara’s hand away from her, grumbling at the elf, “Swear to god, you’d be so fucking useless on your own.” If it helps this get less stupid, though, Lydia moves past Mara and into the fog. Unlike Mara, she doesn’t feel anything on her arms, but once she’s fully inside, the cape around her neck yanks backwards, momentarily choking her and making her stumble. Well, as much as a woman built like a steel girder can stumble. Unlike Mara, Lydia just backs out on her own, her spear drawn and her cape clutched in her fist to keep anything from yanking. Hope that was useful. 

“Okay, wait, what did that feel like?” Mara asks.

“It felt like being strangled, asshole.” Lydia rubs the front of her throat. 

“Okay, but you didn’t feel anything against your chest?” Mara definitely didn’t get strangled, she just got shoved. 

“No?” Lydia hates mages, why can’t these traps just be spears shooting out of the walls? She could deal with that, she loves spears. 

“Okay! So!” Mara flaps her sleeves around in excitement for being smart for once. “I think I actually do know about this one! There’s this spell called Invisible Army, where you can summon a mist that can interact physically with your targets? But it can only interact with one specific element, and most people use it for, like, skin or metal so it can fight against people, you know?” Mara’s only ever even heard of this spell because she tried experimenting with its sexual uses… it, like, *kinda* worked? “I think it’s like that but for fabric! It pushed back against my whole upper body because I have my dress and cloak on, but since you’re wearing armor, all it could affect was your cape!” She’s way too excited about this… 

“Okay, whatever, you know how to cancel the spell then, right?” 

“Haha, no~!” Mara coos, almost making Lydia pop a blood vessel. “But don’t worry about it! All we need to do to get past is take all the cloth stuff off! Easy!”

Lydia… doesn’t like this plan. Mara would need to get totally naked, and Lydia would have to take off her cape and her sash and her boots… and maybe the… the clothes underneath and.... The thought of taking *anything* off in front of someone made Lydia nauseous, let alone in front of some naked slut, and LET ALONE *everything.* “No,” she says, sounding just a tad sick. “No, I’m not going to do that.”

“Wha-why not…?” Mara asks, already half-way out of her robe. 

“Because I’m not,” Lydia answers immediately. “Is there actually no other way to do this, or are you just being an asshole and refusing to undo it yourself?” 

“N-no, I don’t… Dispelling things isn’t something I learned how to do, this is… are you alright?” Mara sounds both upset and worried at the same time, because usually when Lydia yelled at her, it was just anger, not like… she sounded ill. And Mara really thought she’d finally figured something out, and it just ended up making things worse… 

“I just don’t want to do that!” Lydia barks defensively. “Just… I’ll wait in the carriage, don’t get yourself killed.” And with that, she turns around and walks back down the stairs, leaving Mara without a brain. The mage droops, never understanding what’s going on with the goblin. She’d really thought she’d done good this time… 

Well… she shouldn’t let that get her down, she guesses. She might feel like someone just punched her in the chest, but she still has a princess to save!

Huzzah. . .

Mara strips and bundles all of her clothes up into a ball, tucking them under her arm as she stands naked before the fog. It’s still kinda cold here, and she only feels it more as her bare feet touch the stone floor beneath her, so her nipples stand on end and her skin runs with goosebumps. Trying to push the angst out of her head, she steps slowly into the room of fog. 

And for what it’s worth, it seems like she was right! The only sensation she feels is a tugging on the ball in her arms. Other than that, she seems completely immune to the spell’s effects. Nice! If she was in a better mood, she’d see what would happen if she laid some cloth against her pussy and just let the invisible army go to town, since she’s never thought of using this spell against anything other than skin before, it was really interesting… But she thinks she’ll just move on, after the workaround she’d been getting earlier. And after. Emotional distress. 

About halfway into the room, though, Mara stepped onto the carpet. Which is probably one of the things Lydia would’ve been good at preventing. The rug is ripped out from under her feet, making her fall onto her ass and drop her clothes. “Fuck-” Mara can’t even finish her swear before the carpet starts to wrap itself around her waist, probably to either throw her out of the room or out of the window. 

She wasn’t a Grand Knight for nothing, though, and it’d take more than an enchanted carpet to take her out. She uses Sensual Blink to teleport out of the rug’s grasp… and onto the nearest vaguely phallic object she could find, which happened to be a door handle. She could do anything, including teleportation, as long as it was sexy. Not that she found getting fucked by a door particularly hot, but it was better than nothing. Pulling the knob out of her pussy, leaving behind some slick, she rushes to get the door open before the carpet can snatch her up again. Her hand nearly slips off as she opens the door because of her own wetness, but even as she hears the ruffle of the animated cloth coming up behind her, she manages to throw open the door, throw her naked ass into the passage beyond, and slam the door shut right in the rug’s… well, not face, it didn’t have one of those, but you get the idea. 

She breathes heavy as the final staircase leading up into the princess’s suite lays before her. Sure, she’s naked, but she can, uh… pick up her stuff on the way out, right? The princess will have to strip to follow her out, anyway, it’s fine. It’s fine. She stands, stretching her slender frame out as she prepares to climb the stairs. Princesses are, like… fine with it, right? They knew how knights… were… How knights were… most of the time… in the past…   
…

Mara grumbles angrily and opens the door at her back. She’s gonna get her shit back. By the time the carpet’s far enough away for her to open the door, though, she can see her outfit animated, acting on its own as if to stop her. Well, that was fine. Just gave her a target~. She runs a finger up the length of her slit, drawing out its wetness on her finger. Then, with a flick of her wrist, the moisture extends into a long spear-like pole, solidifying into solid, magical, horny matter. She was *supposed* to make dildos with this spell, but no one ever said you couldn’t improvise. 

She wields her pussy juice like a sword, and when the invisible army makes her own clothes rush her, she twirls the cumstick in front of her, catching her robe up on its end and quickly flinging it behind her, out of the fog. Her dress doesn’t bother with the fancy formation, it just tries to wrap itself around her and drag her back into the room. When it does that, though, she snaps her fingers and causes a rapid breast expansion, trapping her dress in her cleavage and allowing her to pluck it out and throw it to safety. 

As her chest returns to normal size, she briefly contemplates leaving her socks and shoes behind. She didn’t *really* need them, right? But then again, if the princess had a foot fetish or something, Mara can’t take any chances. 

Her socks jab at her like blunt spears, trying to bludgeon her, probably, as her shoes try to sweep her feet. A physical fighter Mara is not, but what she is is versatile. She briefly deflects the blows with her cunny rapier before realizing something as she looks at the rounded toes of her shoes and the cylindrical shape her socks had taken on when they were made into weapons. Well that was just too easy. Her pussy glows briefly as she charges up the Sensual Blink, only this time, she was prepared for a quadruple penetration. In a flash, she was back in the safety of the stairwell, with a shoe and sock combo shoved up her pussy, with the other member of each pair lodged up her ass. “Nnha…” Yeah, she was kinda glad Lydia wasn’t here now. Having to watch Mara pull her footwear out of her holes probably wasn’t going to improve the merc’s improvement of the mage. 

But with that, her outfit is complete, and she’ll be sure to be more careful around that carpet when she comes back through. Getting dressed, Mara was finally ready. She climbs the stairs in a hurry, ignoring the pain in her legs and the wetness between them from all that horny magic she just did. This was it, the moment she’s spent 3 years training for. She was finally going to prove that she was worth something.

She reaches the door at the top of the stairs, throws it open, and finds a completely empty room on the other side. Not *empty* empty, there’s furniture - a wardrobe, a bed, a mirror, even a door leading to what Mara presumes is a bathroom - but absolutely no people, let alone a princess. 

That was fine, maybe she was taking a piss or something? “Hello?” Mara calls out, receiving no answer. “Helloooo?” She enters the suite carefully, looking around the room for any possible traps. She can’t see anything, though, and definitely isn’t hearing anything. “Is anyone here? A princess? A wolf?” No response. “Anything!?” She throws open the bathroom door and finds a small room with a toilet that also happens to be devoid of life. “The fuck, man!?” 

Did Oswald beat her here? No fucking way, there’s no way he managed to cut her off! Last night, Lydia had kept driving way past when Oswald would’ve thought it was necessary to set up camp, she *had* to be in the lead, right? One of the other Grand Knights? Did they even know what was going on yet? There’s just no fucking way that someone beat her here, is there? So then where the fuck is she!?

Okay, calm down. Think about the traps. She remembers from Oswald’s ramblings that they were always themed. So there was a big mattress that tried to eat her but ended up fucking her instead. It made her sleepy. The last trap was about fabric? Invisible… fog people? Was there a fog princess? Invisible…? 

Wait! She turns her attention to the bed, running over to it and throwing off the covers, expecting to find something. Instead, there’s just a bed. The pillows are two different colors, but other than that, it just looks like a bed. “MOTHERFUCK!” She throws a pillow against a wall in frustration, ready to start yelling some more asking what the hell was going on, but as the pillow she just threw hit the wall, she hears a squeak. 

“Ow! Okay, okay, I’m getting up, jeez!” Mara turns her head in the direction of the voice and sees the pillow she just chucked standing up, stumbling onto a pair of cushiony feet. “You don’t need to yell, you know…” It wasn’t just that the pillows on the bed had been two different colors, its that one was an inanimate pillow and the other was a sentient being. With a face. And a crown. 

The pillow girl lazily got to her feet, standing at what couldn’t be more than four and a half feet even if she hadn’t been slouching. She had on a purple tank top with a heart on the front, along with matching pajama shorts. Her entire body was fluff, her limbs just rods of pillow and her head a large cushion, all of it looking unendingly soft. Her round cheeks bore a slight, blue blush, and her eyelids were lidded with fatigue. As she yawned, stretching her plush arms over her head, Mara realized that she’d just chucked the Pillow Princess against a wall. 

“OH MY GOD!” Mara yelps, bowing out of respect, “I’M SO SORRY!”

“Stop yelling!” the princess retorts with sleepy annoyance. 

“R-right…! S-sorry…!” A-at least she did it…? Yaay…! Oh god what did she just do…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Profile #9: Decadent Dakimakura Kingdom’s, Pillow Princess  
> Real Name: Serena  
> Species: Plushkin  
> Age: 25  
> Height: 4’3”  
> Fabric: White  
> Cushion: Baby Blue  
> Position: Whatever’s Less Work (Always bottoms)  
> Love: 2, Lust: 4, Power: 0, Charisma: 2, Intelligence: 1  
> Turn-ons: Somnophilia, Submission, Body Fluids, Erotic Lit, Public Use  
> Turn-offs: Active Participation, Any position where she has to stand, Effort in general  
> Heirloom - Shimmering Sheets - With this, the princess can turn any sub into her own personal dom. A knight can use it to make their skin soft and cushiony, raising defense.   
> Lust Gift - Plush Knight - Anyone who cuddles the doll while they sleep will live out their comfiest fantasies in their dreams.  
> “The soft and fluffy princess of the plushkin would prefer to stay in bed than get rescued, so don’t expect her to do much on your quest, okay?”  
> \- - -  
> Here's a visual reference for the new princess! And a sneak peak at my personal chart. I literally cannot believe no one making a Towergirls chart has done this before lmao  
> https://imgur.com/a/TZNxOrx


End file.
